custody cases?

Question

ok here is whats going on ...i am a single mom of four teenaged boys ,well one just turned 18 and is graduating.whom i am very proud of i might add .
well i have been divorced 10 1/2 yrs i have custody well now he is trying to get them from me .
i will tell you what happened when i told my ex i wanted a divorce i also told him i am keeping the boys and i am going to go for support well i was young and dumb he turned around and told me he would give up his rights and never see his kids well i didnt want that kids need there father in there lives well he took them every other weekend no problems for 9 yrs we remained friends of course for the kids sake.well he got married a second time to a nice women got along with her she is great .well he left her after they had a son together and she was 5 months pregnant for another women well since this new gf come into our lives its been hell .she is trying to control everyone and telling myself and his soon to be 2 ex wife how to raise our children ,,she controls my ex and tells him what to say to both of us ...well anyway back to why i am scared ok april 25 th 2006 my ex came to the house to pick up our 16 yr old son he wanted to stay over his house the other boys stayed with me ..well our other son whom is gonna be 13 was coming down the street well my ex started on him ,see he sprained his ankle a couple of weeks before this his p.t. told him to start using it so he was well his father was like well it looks like your better your out jumping around and acting like a retard your acting as if you never hurt urself well my son got upset walked away from his dad came over to me to tell me about what his dad said all i know is next thing he has him over aganst a garage i couldnt see what was going on i assumed he was yelling at him from walking away till he went to leave my son was holding his throat that is when my other sons had told me he had him by the throat i said why didnt you say something i took my son into the house he was holding his throat and crying he couldnt breathe well my bf took him to the sink trying to splash cold water on his face to calm him down when my son coughed there was some blood in his spit he wanted me to have his dad arrested i couldnt do it cause i knew one day he would want to see his dad again so i told my son come on we are going to the doctors they took xrays he sprained our sons neck and gave him a contusion,well after that happened the two little ones didnt want togo over there so i wasnt gonna force them i told them when you are ready pick up the phone and call him i would never stop you from seein your father i did tell the gf what had happened and she said fathers do that to there children i said not to mine she said well he does it to my son to keep him in line i said well you can then ,but he is to never touch my sons again well he stopped my support of 50 aweek to nothin so i took him to domestics for support now he wants to sue me for custody.i am a full time mom ,i take them to all there appointments (dentist&doctors).i take care of them when there sick.i was with my son all the times he had surgery .i was here for my boys since birth ,here for them 24/7 they are my life.nothing comes before them . he wasnt always in there lives he has been in alot of different relationships were those women we more important then his boys ,well not me i have been with the same man for 10 yrs i lived on my own 9 of those yrs and raised my sons.still raising them doing the best i can .i go to school meetings i do everything i can to get the kids the help they need in school.i cant lose them they are my life. my world.everyone tells me not to worry about it i am a great mom and everyone knows it.my sister said tina it will come out that you have been there for your boys always. that you take great care of them ...see when i would call my ex and tell him all the help i get for my boys he tells me there is nothing wrong with them they need a foot up there **** .he would be like give them two me for a couple of weeks i ll straighten them out im like no thats ok .see he was abusive when i was married to him i know what that meant and i am still afraid of him till this day

does anyone know about the law?

my ex sued me back in june for custody after i sued him for support and we got ordered in july to pay for a home evaluation i paid my half he didnt i just got a letter from my lawyer that he didnt pay his so he is being held in contempt of court so does anyone know what will happen now ?we have court on oct 6th ..

i didnt call the police cause i was still afraid of him i went to the doctors i went to women in crisis and i went to the school guidance counsler for help...so its not like i just let the abuse go without seeking some help ..and i took my son to the doctor to get checked and to have it documented ...my ex beat the hell out of me when i was married to him im sorry i still fear him but i will never make that mistake again ..i will have that bastard arrested ..........

i did tell my son i made the mistake and i would never do it again....sorry i made a mistake !!!!!

Answer 1

First of all, take a deep breath. It appears from your letter, that you are a good mother. Your boys are almost adults and ususally when children hit a certain age, the courts let them make up their minds as to where they want to live. Usually this age is 12--it may be different in your state. It appears that your boys enjoy living with you and have established their friends, school etc. while in your care. I believe the court will do what is right for your boys--not for you or your ex.

As far as the abuse mentioned in your letter, I will tell you that it is best to have documented evidence when charging someone with these accusations. If you really feel that your ex is a danger to yourself and lives of your children, please contact your local police on obtaining a restraint order that will provide adequate protection for all parties involved. Do not hesitate in contacting your local enforcement when intenvention is needed.

There are various times you mention that you are concerned that if you charge your ex with a crime, that you fear your boys will never see him again. You must understand that if you are in fear of this man, you MUST take adequate measures to protect yourself and children. Your children SHOULD BE your priority and not the feelings or future of this man that seems to be living life on a whim with whatever woman will play house with him at the time.

Please obtain some legal representation whether it be through a local legal aid society (which is at no cost depending on your income) or retain legal representation within your state who will be able to provide legal advice and is educated on the laws within your state.

Good luck to you.

Answer 2

Whoever was once worried in any of those occasions will support you to achieve sole custody of your little one. Even if there was once no file I might move asap on your historical boss and get this in writing to have while you want it. Also, friends, loved ones whoever could have heard or witnessed some thing threatening too can support and could also be had to name on in court docket. The extra ammunition you've the larger. The courts continually wish to do whats first-class for the little one. If he does not exhibit up or they are not able to discover him you must be ready to dossier for sole custody. Unfortunantly, its difficult to attend, I understand. Good Luck and feature the whole thing you'll suppose of in a position. Most importantly police files when you've got them.

Answer 3

shame on you, you are there to protect your children, your son will never forget that incident, may God watch over him, and pray that your son knows that behavior is not acceptable, i feel very sorry for your son right now, he looked up to you, and i feel you let him down by not calling the police, you should have showed your son you love him more, than trying to protect the dad, its too late now, but you son will always have that on his mind everytime he sees his dad. make amends now to your son, tell him you will always be by his side, admit that it was your mistake that you did not call the police,

Answer 4

The way things sound, he doesn't have any evidence to prove that the children will be better off with him than you.