Wife is blind abt affair but as hubby gets terminally ill, tells her he has had another woman for 5 years and would like to see her before he dies. Hubby assures wife that he loves wife but also has learned to love the mistress. As the wife, would u grant his request to see the other woman? Would u let ur kids know that about their dad's clandestine affair?
2006-10-01 04:45:11 · 21 answers · asked by Milie88 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No. I would just restrict all the visitors so that only the immediate family was permitted.
In fact when I was alone with him I would tell him he is not going to get a fancy funeral but is going to end up being donated to a medical school as a cadaver for autopsy practice. I would tell him that it was going to be soon since every time I visit I will wiggle the plug from his life support so that it was on the verge of falling out of the outlet. I would also tell him about the special spot in hell reserved for cheaters and liars like him and that is probably where he is going to see that sl** the next time.
After five years of my hearing his lies he deserves to hear some from me.
2006-10-01 04:58:54 · answer #1 · answered by Rich Z 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! What a burden on this wife. I think that she must love her husband very much so despite his affair she seems to make sure he is comfortable for his final days, she will allow the other woman to see him. Her children should be told if they are old enough to understand. Why should she have to deal with a terminally ill husband and a five year affair all on her own. This woman has enough to deal with.
I think if poor daddy is healthy enough to be thinking about his mistress then he should tell his children himself about his infidelity before his poor wife lets the #%#$$ anywhere around her husband.
I would also advise that she check to make sure this "mistress" hasn't moved in on the financial aspect of her terminally ill husbands life.
2006-10-01 12:04:12 · answer #2 · answered by midlifemommy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I work at Hospice. It helps the person have a more spiritual and peaceful death if they have talked to and seen everyone that they need to see. Sometimes things lay on their hearts and cause them to have emotional pain and it helps them to know that everyone knows how they feel. However I think you need to have a good talk with this man about the affair that he has had. I know that would be terriable to find out that not only is your husband dying but the last time that you had on earth with him was a time that he had spent sharing with another woman.
2006-10-01 15:46:42 · answer #3 · answered by gaillee9 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I would not! There's no need to tell the kids and mar their feelings for their dad unless the other woman makes it an issue. The other woman is his mistress. She has no rights. He is cruel and selfish to confess such an affair to his unknowing wife on his death bed.
2006-10-01 11:52:22 · answer #4 · answered by Blondie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think I would let him see the other woman. Should have told wife about her before he got terminally ill.
The kids would never have to know, no need to tell them.
2006-10-01 11:48:12 · answer #5 · answered by Michelle *The Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you've ever had a husband that cheats you might know the pain. Would like to think I'd be a bigger person than I am, but HELL no. He denied me having his full affection, so I'd deny. Unless I had time to absorb the betryal and then could make a decision. Spure of moment. NO. If he can't get up it is my choice.
Just being honest.
experience: Married 15 years to someone who cheated.
2006-10-01 11:51:43 · answer #6 · answered by Babydoll 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
he can see whoever he wants but he wouldent see me anymore as soon as i found out my husband was cheating terminally ill or not i would be gone so far gone he woulent know what hit him let the mistress watch him suffer while he dies i wouldent tell my kids unless they were over 18
2006-10-01 11:49:48 · answer #7 · answered by lisaisfunn1 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No I would not. Family and friends yes, mistress no. And my kids would not know of his affair and request.
2006-10-01 12:04:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no i would not allow him to see her, and no i wouldnt let the children know, i would let him know how i felt and i would be very angry at him, and i would let him know that to but i would also be compassionate for what he is going thur and would stand with him til the end, but i wouldn't give up because i would have to forgive him, because he was dieing, but i would let him know how i felt and i would have to deal with one issue at a time, if he insited on seeing her i would leave him and never return and i would tell him that, abecause he cant love me and cheat on me too
2006-10-01 11:51:03 · answer #9 · answered by cuteangelbreeze 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would absolutely allow her in if it is going to make his last days happier...the kids thing is really a personal call and has alot to do w/ their ages....but to deny such a simple last request would be somewhat selfish on her part...good luck making it through this hurdle and remember that what does not kill us only makes us stronger in the end
2006-10-01 11:53:45 · answer #10 · answered by chereeder 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋