my grandaughter keeps staying out.?

Question

My grandaughter keeps staying out and not telling me where she is, she lives me with me and i get fed up with roaming the streets trying to find her, she did it the other night and i got in late and went to bed as i was exhausted and not up to it again. anyway she did not come back so i went on the search for her and people see her with people but i called the police and she did not come home. They asked me why i did not call the police the first night and i feel guilty and now they have taken her into care, why does she keep doing this to me, she used to be a good girl but she does go around with a bad lot and they get her into trouble the social worker said they found her at a unsuitable address, to be honest i am sick and tired of her she plays up at school and i have to go in every day and sit with her, everyone expects so much of me and i know i did wrong not calling the police that night. well she is going into foster care now. will i see her again i am worrried i wont.

Answer 1

There are things you can do if you get her back. But without knowing what you have or can use as a carrot, it is hard to say. I do not know what financial shape you are in and such. I could not suggest you use any technique involving removing a computer if you live in the hood and don't have one, or MP3 player etc. What you can do at about any income level is hit them in the stomach, food wise I mean. Each day after she has sneaked out. that day every meal she get fed "juke balls". The law say you have to feed her a nutritious meal but they didn't say how it had to be done or presented. Take everything everyone else is eating, pork chops, peas etc. And put it ALL in a food processor or blender and mix it all together. It should be like a dough. Cobble it like a loaf or put it in a bread pan and bake it until it is stiff. And that is what she east. Secure ALL the other food so she has access to only the "juke ball" and confiscate any allowance she has so she cannot go out and buy McDonald's or anything. A couples of days of eating that, I think you will see her attitude change. Nothing like hunger to motivate. If she eats it, I will be highly surprised. Could give you better suggestions but I don't have enough facts.

Answer 2

I can't help but wonder where the parents of this child are and why she is living with you. Personally, I would have done the same thing you did. Being a grandmother myself I can imagine how upset you were and wouldn't even think about calling the police. For some reason in the beginning we think in the positive. "oh, I'll just go out and find her"...but that seldom happens. At least now she is not going to be a burden to you. You can be a loving, caring grandmother without having to deal with the emotional upheaval that she seems to cause you. We brought our kids up and now it's our time. It's sad to say but no matter how much we try, kids today have no respect for their elders which is why she did that to you.
Now that she will be in a foster care situation you will have time to get yourself together and think about having your own life with no major worries. Sure you will worry about her but in a different way. Now you won't have to go out in the middle of the night looking for her. That in itself should be a relief for you. We're not getting any younger. Good luck to you and your grandaughter...

Answer 3

Stop beating yourself up, you did what you think is for the best interest of your granddaughter. She has to take some of that responsibility, since she would not listen to you, then she will have to listen to someone else. May be you saved her life, who knows what would have happened, if you did nothing, just keep praying for her. You can see her in foster care, you will have visits. and you can call her, to check on her. May be she needs that structure. Remember this is the consequences for her actions, she did this to her self, so get yourself together, and start to take care of you, this had to be very stressful for you.

Answer 4

i really do understand ur situation and feel sorry for u..don't wry,things will be alrite..i am just 22yrs old and i think that i am not old enough or experienced in life to give u advice..still will try my level best to help u out...if u get an oppurtunity just sit with ur grand daughter and have a small conversation with her in which u have to make her realise that u care a lot for her and she is very important to u...also try to make her aware of the consequences of bad company which she is having now...she is just not matured enough to decide b/w rite and wrng..i think she will be back in to track if u show her some love and make her realise tat wat she is doing will not do gud to her in future..if at all u trust in god, just make it a point to pray for an hour daily thru which u will be able to get some peace of mind which is important at this age of urs..there are certain things in this world which cannot be resolved by human...at some point of time or other u need the help of super power to give u some comfort..hope u wud agree to this...i am sure u wud meet ur daugher....don't wry..hope this small piece of advice has helped..all the best and convey my regards to ur daughter.

Answer 5

the mind ,the feel ,and our behavior specially these days ,are just under our control ,we do every thing we want ,the modernism ,and less warm relation between us ,our good friends and family ,living in big crowed cities ,all are matters that we as parent cant control ,i am sure u were good grandma but freedom of mind and idea this days the way that is growing our indepence also threat our teenagers ,the most bad guys use of this attribute of society to get teenagers freedom in decision to their benefits ,any way u couldnt and cant do more for her ,any way she must by her self had experience ,i never say its good ,but u cant restrict her ,the social care service is really good idea ,she will grows any way ,u never have bad feel ,u did all u could ,just try to understand her ,her age ,the teenagers never look at the world as me or u ,they are the kings of their little world ,and every body that wanted to restrict them is opposite of freedom ,the jail commander to them,then just be her close friend ,try to find good friends for her ,good fun ,and let her mind and her experience grows ,after years i am sure she will be the good one u wished ,but u must to know u never must hurt u ,be sure she more need her good grandma rather that u be sick by ur self,let time goes ,and try to far care of her ,and u work on her bad thoughts ,not directly ,by ur movements and ur patient and ur care ,by my heart i say i wished to have grandma as u
let time goes
ur sincerely

Answer 6

Sorry, but there might not something you can do to change the way she behaves all you can do is make sure she comes home in one piece, but she has to decide to change her behavior make sure that you sit her down and express the way that she makes you feel when she behaves like that.

Answer 7

Get some help from social services i did it worked, ask for a child support friend, if you dont things could go wrong

Answer 8

Well, what the heck do you think she is doing??

Wise up, gran..

Sex, alcohol, and drugs are good bets for starters.

Either take control or get with the authorities and get her out
of your house and out of your responsibility.

You are doing no one any good by shirking your responsibility.

GOOD GRIEF!!!!!!!

Answer 9

I'm sure you can get her back, if drug mothers can retain custody of their kids again. You definitely could. Good Luck

Answer 10

idk :(