No i tried to get him to a counslor but he refuse. I am not a nag. I'm seeking 4 advise. I'm currently saving 2 get out but @ the same time this is MY house & everything is under my name. He sign the quit claim deed meaning he had nothing 2 do with it. I think it is the kids that makes me second guess myself. At the same time I am afraid if i leave my sole property he will not pay the mortgage. I am afraid that my credit will be messed up. I don't want my credit go bad because i know when i am on my own w/ the kids than credit is very important. To get shelter, food, clothing & emergencies. That is 1 reason why i don't want to leave my house. I can sell but my area is not a sellers or buyers market. Everyone else in the area is selling but no one is buying the houses since the prices more than double of what it was worth 4 years ago. I am really hoping that i would get some pretty good answers & not just someone trying to message to get points.
2006-09-30 20:45:10 · 7 answers · asked by smartie2828 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What can't he understand? I am so confussed about your whole situation, but the first thing that came to my mind is this...go see a lawyer, get a restraining order against him. Pack his crap and put it on the lawn. Have the locks changed. If the house is yours, then there is no reason for you to leave. He's the one that has to go. The restraining order can be temporary, in MS it's ten days and you don't need a lawyer for that one. You go to the courthouse, and tell them the situation, and you will go before the judge and if he believes that you need one, he will grant a temporary. If you need one for longer than that time, then you have to get a lawyer to file for a permanent one.
Are you physically afraid of this man? If so, then I would say hell to my credit score, pack my bags and the girls up and leave. Your credit can always be built back up. If you can handle him, then tomorrow, I would call an attorney and get the ball rolling. Find out your legal rights. You are going to have to stand your ground, and it's going to be rough. But if you want him out, he's going to have to go whether he wants to or not. Try to do this all in one day, the attorney, the restraining order, and please remember to change the locks. Pack up his stuff nicely, and set it outside. Put it on the porch, under the carport. somewhere if it rains it won't ruin.
I know you don't want to hurt the girls, but if Mommy is not happy, and she can't deal anymore with the Daddy-they can't really truly be happy themselves. It's going to be an adjustment for all of you. My friend told me, the old saying "you don't really know a person until after you marry them" is wrong......"you don't really know a person until you are going through a divorce" is the real truth. Her husband was similar to yours, but he would toss her out, and then want her back in a couple of days. He threw her out 5 times in 2 years, and promises that things were going to change, and she wanted the marriage to work, so she would go back. Finally, when he physically tossed her out the door in the middle of the night, she woke up. Their divorce will be final soon, and he's still calling wanting her back, he loves her, and wants to make things right. She finally had had enough.
Honey, divorce is never easy. I can't understand how he could want to stay where he's not wanted, but you know he has some major issues, but when he refused to seek help...he might as well signed the divorce papers then. First thing in the morning call a lawyer, find out what you can and can't do. You shouldn't have to live like this it's not good for any of you, even that stubborn husband of yours. Praying for you and your family that you can find the answers to your problems, and that you have the strength to deal with all of this.
God bless us all....................
2006-10-01 03:27:23 · answer #1 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u are wanting to leave him, and this is your house then why not make HIM leave instead? If he's refusing counseling then that means he doesn't see a problem or issue. U can lead the horse to water but u can't make him drink so u decide what u are going to do with this marriage. If u want out, file for divorce and kick him out of your own house as it seems like he wants the family but not the responsibility.
2006-10-01 03:50:54 · answer #2 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Focus, right now you are living in hell, but you have to focus. So simply set your goals. Do you want to make a profit from selling the house, or do you want to fix your life?
Put your house up for sale, you might have to lower your selling price.define where you will move, talk to the lawyers you need to talk to, and set yourself a deadline. Otherwise you will be stuck there for a long time without improving or moving. You simply have to take decisions, realize that anything you do will cost a price, and act on your decisions and be ready to pay for them. Only then will things in your life change for good.
Good luck, and remember: FOCUS
2006-10-01 04:25:45 · answer #3 · answered by avll 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if it's your home and he has no right to it while he is out or at work File for divorce, pack up his stuff put in out in the driveway and change the locks and tell him to leave. If he don't listen get the court involved.
2006-10-01 03:54:20 · answer #4 · answered by kittykat78 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you put your credit befor eyour life you r a fool
2006-10-01 03:58:36 · answer #5 · answered by jac 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be your self
2006-10-01 06:01:57 · answer #6 · answered by mazen71j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ah.......ha
2006-10-01 04:07:18 · answer #7 · answered by 185 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋