My brother is 18, and I just had a conversation with him in which he told me that "****ers" wanted to jump him and his friend. Then he and his friend showed the knife and baseball bat they had, to get the guys to go away. I said that this was just asking for more trouble down the road, and they should have NEVER done that. He said something about "what do they expect coming into white town". I'm disgusted. This is my own brother and we were not raised this way. He is NOT hard - our father is an attorney, and our mom is a teacher. With his language and attitude I'm afraid to bring home my black boyfriend for Christmas. His attitude and actions disgust me. I would NEVER use the N word. A couple questions:
1. How many of you have experienced situations similar to this (I think he's doing something to increase the likelihood that he'll have these kind of experiences)?
2. How can I get through to him about his ignorant white trash attitude?
2006-09-30 19:04:03 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Other - Cultures & Groups
Doesn't anyone have any stories about white kids getting the shi* beat out of them for using the N word? That's the kind of story I need to deter him from using this kind of language.
2006-09-30 19:10:05 · update #1
You won't deter him just by telling him stories...It will have to happen to him and believe me...if he actually says that to a black person, it will happen. If you want, he can come to my house and I will do it for him...and I'm a female, but that word brings out the worst in most black people, but most white people know better than to say it in front of black people and they usually only do if they are drunk...or asking to get their asses kicked.
2006-09-30 19:13:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I have a similar problem with my brother, minus the boyfriend, subtract a couple of years, and open the category to include racism against basically all races.
My brother's fourteen and he's the most racist guy I've ever met, which really confuses me because we were raised by the same parents so you'd assume we'd have the same open outlook. I'm still trying to get through to him, but it's really hard.
I'd recommend maybe taking him to a diversity workshop, that's what I'm planning to do with my brother so that he can see how damaging and hurtful racism can be. Make him watch something like "Mississippi Burning" or " A Time to Kill". Those are pretty good movies that illustrate how horrible racism can be. "American History X" was pretty good, too, but it was also really controversial so I'm not sure if you'd be interested in that. Hope that helps.
2006-09-30 20:31:33 · answer #2 · answered by Love, Jealous One, Love 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to realize right now that you can NOT change his views, he's 18 and it's his choice regardless his upbringing and your opinions. As far as the possibility of his enticing situations, he probably is. I have a brother like that and I once dated a black guy, they got into and honey beat the crap out of him, so bad the police told him to go to the hospital. He never voiced those opinions around me again. He hasn't changed and that was about 20 years ago.
As far as bringing honey home for the holidays, depends on how strong the relationship is, how do your parents feel about him? Does he know how your brother is? And, face it... will it be worth the hell your brother is going to cause ruining everyone's holiday?
Let me tell you my situation...my husband is a legal resident from Mexico and my father is a "Minuteman/wanna be Border Patrol" in AZ, you have to accept you can't change someone, only they can do it themself.
2006-09-30 19:20:58 · answer #3 · answered by ♥alsmom♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will never be able to change his mind, unless you introduce him to a cool black male. As a black woman, I have to say your brother may have started this conflict. If not, then he is going to have some serious conflict in the future. This IS my advice, tell him to gather up some friends, any race and fight. Then the black boys will then know your brother has clout. More of a 'rooster' type of challenge. To see who can yell the loudest. That's all it comes down to. To see who's weak. Around black folk, NEVER show happiness, tears, soft attributes, or that you don't have too many friends. It will only show WEAKNESS to black folk, to other races it shows 'decency'. GOOD LUCK.
2006-09-30 19:18:41 · answer #4 · answered by denisebrown190 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Fear isn't a suitable motivating factor since his hate is already coming out of fear. It will reinforce his incorrect views.
I'm a Caucasian / Native American. My first buddy in the Army is a black man. He is an honorable and great friend and full of integrity. He is also a brother of mine in Christ.
We are all God's children.
Fear opens the door to Satanic deception, and turns God's children against each other.
It will take a decision to serve the Lord before any will serve their fellow man.
2006-09-30 19:36:42 · answer #5 · answered by Just David 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I knew of some guys visiting US from Aus. One of their surnames was Black. While walking on opposite sides of the road, one of the Aussies innocently called out "Hey Blackey" to his mate. That was his nick name, after all. All hell broke loose, as a few coloured guys took offence and started punching into the group.
2006-09-30 19:16:24 · answer #6 · answered by eddie_schaap 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, he's 18. I'm not justifying his behavior, but he is extremely vunerable to outside influences at his age. I would just continue to talk to him, like you have, and hopefully he'll come to his senses. Hopefully you can help him realize that race shouldn't matter. As far as the bat and the knife go, he's using it as self defense. Would you rather that he go up against these guys empty handed? What if they seriously hurt him? He has every right to protect himself against someone. No matter who they are.
2006-09-30 19:13:07 · answer #7 · answered by munkees81 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Racism does not go away with any one conversation. He needs to meet some black people that he likes or respects and the racist thing will go away. If he likes sports, get him to talk about the black people he likes
2006-09-30 19:09:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Tell your parents about it and try to get him to go up north. Nobody's racist in New York or New Jersey or places like that.
I feel sorry for him. And you. Why don't you try talking to him?
2006-09-30 19:07:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
there is really nothing u can do about, he has to figure it out on his own
2006-09-30 19:13:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋