I am pregnant, due in 5 weeks. A month ago the babies dad my ex boyfriend kicked me out of his parents house told me he didn't love me or want to be with me anymore. Then he started playing these head games with me saying I want to be a family and then turning around and showing totally different. Recently I found out he is running around with a 34 year old married woman, and he is very far into an addiction of cocaine and alcohol. He denies all of these things of course. He still goes to my doctors appointments with me and yesterday he had a hickey on his neck. Then in the room he wants to kiss me touch my belly tell me he loves me. I told him not to because he obviously doesn't care for my feelings. Then he presumes to tell me he didn't like having sex with me because it is weird having sex with a pregnant woman. With my belly and he thinks the baby might know. This I have heard of before. Please help... what should I do?
2006-09-30 17:25:52 · 11 answers · asked by JB 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
He started messing around with this woman after we had not been together. But at the same time he was saying he wants to work this out. Also do you think her husband should know?
2006-09-30 17:40:38 · update #1
Do you think he is afraid of the responsibility? And he is trying to live life while he can? We are only 22 and 23.
2006-09-30 17:48:25 · update #2
hey if hes doing drugs thats one thing you don't want around the baby and thats the reason he keeps playing head games with you don't fall for them just tell him that if he really wants to be with you and your child that hes goign to have to go into a clinic to help him out with the drug problem because you don't want something bad to happen to you or the baby. just keep in mind if he is sleeping with someone else then he didn't really care that much about the fact that you two are about to bring this child into the world cheating is never a good thing weather the woman or man is married or not and having sex with a woman thats pregnant is kinda weird but its ok its not bad and it wasn't right for him to kick you out like that exspecally since your pregnant if he did that then hes not good for you or your child your better off alone with the baby raising it alone just keep in mind that it happens to alot of people and for no reason it happened to me as well and my ex loved me enough to quit drugs and help raise our daughter we are no since broken up for fighting but its nothing to bring a child into.
2006-09-30 17:34:18 · answer #1 · answered by baby d 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you already know the answer, you are about to become responsible for the raising of another human being, you will be the most important thing in this child's' life, and you want HIM around her? Just because he's the sperm donor doesn't make him a dad. If you were my daughter or friend I'd be telling you to tell him to hit the road Why would you want to have sex with him knowing he is cheating on you? How do you know he doesn't have any diseases, if something happens to you who is going to take care of that baby? Him? Right. Can you seek counseling from your church or a single mom support group? You need to become self supporting as soon as you can. I know most people hate doing so, but you need to file for every kind of federal assistance program available to you, housing, medical, and even some type of education for yourself so you can become self sufficient and take care of you and the child without any help from ANYBODY!!! And remember, asking for help temporarily isn't a sin, it's when you get lazy and take advantage of the system.
Good luck and if you don't already, pray for guidance... your job is just beginning and it is worth every second, I promise. You be the best mom you can be! And don't forget that child support! When you go into the hospital, ask to speak to their social worker (privately), she'll get you into the right programs or at least in the right direction.
2006-09-30 17:49:20 · answer #2 · answered by ♥alsmom♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Normal reaction from the man not wanting sex with you. My husband and I had this problem. Perhaps he is afraid of hurting you, yet he can try and be intimate with you tenderly. Now far as his addtion and having another woman that is bad. I would tell him to get counseling with his addiction and get a blood test cause his relationship with the other woman to make sure no harm has been done to my baby. Then we would talk our future since a baby is involved. This type of situation happens all the time and surely you have heard it before.
2006-09-30 17:42:41 · answer #3 · answered by JoJoBa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is a total rat. Get away from him and make a life for yourself and the baby. Make sure you file for child support. He must pay support for this child. If necessary get a protective order to keep him away from you. He sounds like he has mental problems or is deeply into drugs.
2006-09-30 17:28:42 · answer #4 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For now, forget about him. Think only about your baby. And therefore stay where you will have a roof above your and your baby's head.
After the child is born, try as hard as you can to become self-sufficient, so you can support yourself and your child on your own.
2006-09-30 17:33:11 · answer #5 · answered by OC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh honey, run don't walk away from this guy. Get a Christian girlfriend or lady from a nice church who will go to those appointments with you and stay away from this guy. I don't think from the sound of it that he should even be around your baby.
It's totally up to you but get away from Him enough to think about this objectively please. And get prayed with by some good bible believing Christians who are not afraid to pray with people.
2006-09-30 18:19:25 · answer #6 · answered by Makemeaspark 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey get away from him. dont bring that baby into that kind of relationship, its gonna be hard enough, and drugs and showing up at your apts with hickeys then telling yu he loves you. tell him you and the baby deserve better, tell him to go play in someone elses back yard. places for you to go to and get the help yu need. if you baby is a girl would you want this type of relationship for her? good luck
2006-09-30 17:31:50 · answer #7 · answered by hamhead 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should move on - he is obviously showing signs of addiction to cocaine and having mental health issues as well. You should seek help from your family or local agencies and do what is best for you and your baby.
2006-09-30 17:29:55 · answer #8 · answered by JJJJJJJJim 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
as hard as it's going to be..kick his *ss to the curb he does not deserve to be a part of your and your baby's life! you can't have a precious child around someone with a cocaine and alcohol addiction, that not fair to the child. he/she didn't ask to be brought into this world, and it's YOUR job to keep him/her safe!!!find a man that will respect, love, and care for you and your baby! good luck
2006-09-30 17:30:29 · answer #9 · answered by *KiM* 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first thing you do is file for child support,and then run as fast as you can from this sorry excuse of a man.
2006-09-30 17:35:11 · answer #10 · answered by glasgow girl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋