why do people look down on you when you liv ein a mobile home?

Question

I have always had a nic ehouse until now I am going to build one, in a year and a half. one lady came by that i know, and she said "why is it so randown" ? I told her its a trailor while she was talking about her daughter was living in a 2 million dollar house and bragging about it, I have a husband with parkinsons, and it is hard to keep it up and a son with autism, my prood sister in law was to good to come in, my bro, came in and my bestfreind came to see me she dont care where i live I know what is lik eto be looked down on for the little that you have. an dthe people that dont care to help mow the yard when my husband is dying and if god willing i get a house, the people who shun me can just stay away I will get back on my feet god helps those who help themselves, tell me what you think thank you

Answer 1

I came from a poor, working-class family. We lived in a small tract home my dad financed through his VA benefits and both parents worked full time to pay their own way while my sisters and I excelled at school. We were poor but were given love, morals, ethics, education and a clean home. I was born with bad health but considered my life blessed. Due to my health problems, I always focused on being well, being loved and loving and finding a good challenge out of any problem. I thought my family and most other folks did too.
By the time I was 30, my parents had divorced and remarried and my sisters were married. I married too and bought a very nice townhouse. My father lived in a sprawling antique mansion in an exclusive neighborhood, my mother owned her own upper middle class home, and my sisters owned homes which were featured in newspapers and magazines and bought new cars every two years.
After living in my townhouse for 3 years, I became permanently disabled and my husband who'd worked since he was 14 in construction became disabled as well. We could no longer afford our home, so we left and found a mobilehome in a rural canyon for $3,500 far away from the city. We were financially a mess but happy. Soon our savings were gone and I got a modest disability check while he applied to Social Security for his disabled worker benefits, but we knew the process would take years and we had to make a new plan and move again. To make a long story short, we lived on my check for 9 years and never asked anyone for a loan or got welfare or did anything but stick together and eventually lived in a forest in a very large and nice 10-man tent to save as much as possible every day & to rent a motel room once a week to obtain our dream goal: To eventually own a mobilehome in a nice park and to have pet cats (I was unable to have children). We did not want a 30 year mortgage to worry over, or to rent someone's house or apartment. Just a cozy singlewide trailor in a small, quiet park to enjoy our lives in peace and privacy.
Well, he finally got his benefits going and we had enough money to find exactly the right trailor in the right place next to the right neighbors and moved in our cats and felt like we won the lottery.
It took me about a year and a half to realize that all my open invitations to both our families were never taken up on. I just assumed that one sister was busy with her hectic job, and another was too far for a one-day visit, or that an in-law wasn't able to navigate their Mercedes to my distant town, etc. etc. During a family get together, while I was describing my new domestic bliss a brother-in-law asked me, "You don't mind if we call it a 'trailor' instead of a 'mobilehome' do you--after all, it does have a hitch and wheels underneath that aluminum skirting."
I made no real answer, just thought about what a idiotic comment that was to someone who was so happy and proud of her achievement and security.
I've heard my share of ignorant comments from people about "trailor trash" and other tactless remarks, but they just rolled off my back. I didn't care because I am happy to have made it and to have my husband with me.
But I'd be lying if I said it didn't matter what my own family really thinks about my lifestyle and environment. I feel that there is a chasm between us that quietly grew during my homeless years while they watched and kept upscaling their homes and jobs and it's strange to me because we all started out from such small means in that little tract house and I never noticed that they were materialistic and still are acquiring more things, a new vacation home, a new BMW, one just bought a million dollar home.
But it's all good, because I fended for myself and am content with what I sacrified to have and no one helped me and my husband do it. In fact, I'm kind of glad that these relatives don't visit so I don't have to act any differently. The people who do come to visit are sincere and always offer us a helping hand and that is special.
I realize it's not a simple and easy road to travel right now for you, but your question made my day. As for that weirdo answer about being weak and the hunted of the predators, he doesn't want to think or hear your story not because of his evolutionary 'theory' but because deep down he knows he could never walk a day in your shoes with grace and stamina.
I am glad that I cannot identify with false pride, shallow and materialistic humans who measure themselves and others by possessions and money. Life is SO MUCH more than those fleeting things. Thanks for your question.

Answer 2

I used to live in an old 12x50 trailer when my husband and I were first married. I was proud of my trailer because I was young and paid for it myself without the help of my parents. Nobody bought my car for me, paid for my education, helped me raise my children, etc. I still have fond memories of the trailer. I also have a child with autism and these things truly become irrelevant. I have a nice car now. I have a nice home with a nice yard. Ask me what I would give up to help make my child better again...the answer would be everything. I would live in a cardboard box and be happy for every minute of it. You really can't buy what matters most. I know you must be having a hard time and to have such a classless human being step on your spirit really reflects on them. They may be rich in their pocketbooks, but their souls are empty. The question is why do they have to put on such airs if everything is so great? The answer is because it's not. When you have to tear someone down just to feel better about yourself, then you know how rundown your humanity is...and they have the nerve to point out your trailer is rundown!! How moronic is that? Maybe they should use some of that money to buy themselves some class? Look, it doesn't matter what others think when you compare it to what you know to be true. They may say hurtful things, but they are like spoiled children who haven't had to struggle and be humbled by life. Try to be grateful you know how to treat a person like a human being and that you have enough heart to never humiliate someone else just to make yourself feel big. I wouldn't want a 2million dollar house if it meant I had to be that kind of person. Be strong, your soul is deep and rich and beautiful. Let ugly people continue to behave themselves into ugliness. It is no reflection on you so you don't need to carry that burden anymore. It even helps to pity them for being forced to live such a fake life. Imagine how shallow their little world must be not to be able to come into a family member's home? Gee, such problems they must bear. My dear, you have GUTS. And you will get back on your feet. That is what I think.

Answer 3

Jealousy. People can't get over the fact that not everyone needs to live in a 12 room house. There is absolutly nothing wrong with living in a mobile home. Some are nicer than most houses I've seen. Why have a big house if three quarters of it is never being used? I wouldn't worry about what other people have to say. You seem like a strong person, especially since what you have to deal with on a regular basis. A house is a house, it takes more than a lot of rooms to make it a home.

Answer 4

Ok, I lived in a trailer house from the time I was born til I graduated and moved out. I don't know what exactly is so repulsive about trailer houses but for some reason they are. I always had issues with it growing up. That doesn't mean that people are right for giving you crap about it though. You're doing the best you can with what you have and you should be commended for hanging in there, not looked down upon. Screw those people for being so superficial and you should only keep the supportive people in your life. You'll feel better that way.

Answer 5

I will love to answer your question! When people are critical of any durned, silly little thing, it's most often because their self esteem isn't the size of a dust mote, & looking DOWN makes them feel superior. Isn't it a laugh & a half? I anyone said something so rude to me, why...I think I'd just give them a BIG SMILE & say: "Must be just because I'm a little old piece of trash." Many years ago, I'd cut my hair, & someone said: "Oh my goodness! Why'd you do such an ugly thing with your hair?"
I put on a sad (fake) face, & said: "I'm so disappointed! I did it just for YOU!" Stopped her in her tracks. I've gotten so I wouldn't even notice if someone gave me a nasty look, or word. I'm sure you've heard "consider the source." It's true. People like the ones you describe aren't worth your time, or even your thoughts. You have so much to be proud of. A very strong woman who--I think--should love herself--so just stay on the course, my dear, & don't be bothered with ignorant people. You WILL get back on your feet--I've been through Hell for some years, & bottom line, even the friends one would hope to count on for little things aren't there when you need them. It's amazing what you can do FOR YOURSELF, ALL BY YOURSELF. There's lots of satisfaction in that. I did it! Just keep hanging in, & I believe your "faith" will definitely help you. Best of luck...

Answer 6

This might come as a surprise to you, but the modern habit of caring for the downtrodden and defending the weak is a very recent development in the history of life on Earth, and it's probably a temporary freak of evolution that will be corrected eventually as those who share their sustenance with the doomed discover themselves sharing their fate, also, though usually too late to do anything to save themselves.

For millions of years, predators watched herds, to learn which of their prey were weak, injured, slow, defective or for whatever reason deficient in the skills of evasion or defense. Those were the animals who died. The strong and fast animals survived -- but they survived because they did not do what liberals today insist that humans do. When the predator charges, liberals want...somebody...to stand with the weak, to defend the botched, to take the bullet for the incompetent, to sacrifice excellence to sentimental charity.

People who live in trailers are poor, and by our measure wealth is strength - at least for now. Other people, who live in nicer, more expensive houses, look down on you because you belong to that part of the human herd which is the natural target of predators.

Nobody wants to be like you. Nobody wants to identify with you. Everybody fears being associated, in the minds of their peers, with the weakness that you represent.

There. Is that clear enough for you? Or must I resurrect Friedrich Nietzsche to explain it better than I can?

Answer 7

*What's important is not the size of your house or the style but how big your home and your heart is. I think you have most people beat on that score. Just keep your head high because what goes around comes around!

Answer 8

You still have your dignity and respect. It sounds pretty ignorant to me for them to act that way. I bet they are in so much debt, they lie awake at night worrying about how to make payments on their big house. Now that's real smart, right.

Answer 9

People will not look down on you unless your mobile home is next to a high-rise apartment building.

Answer 10

People have pride, ignorance and cold hearts.