i had a GF for 7 years and we have a son together, everything was good until i sent her back home for the holidays early this year. apparently she was ' hanging out' with a guy abit too often and my friends informed me of this. everybody including her friends told her that this guy is no good, a looser and player. when she came back, i confronted her about this. she swore that nothing happened and i believed her. things were not smooth since. she neglected things and became more demanding and selfish. we got into a fight and i told her to go back and leave our son. a few weeks ago i found evidence that she had an affair with him, so i called her parents and officially broke off our relationship. i kept my son cause i have alot more to offer him (i am canadian while she is african). in terms of education, upbringing, etc. it has been 5 months now and my son doesn't even ask for her!! she is now officially with this guy.
my question is, why is she pissed off at me and being vindictive?
2006-09-30 10:31:41 · 17 answers · asked by ali k 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She's not pissed off at you...she's done with you and her son. I don't know what she is being vindictive about....she has basically kicked you and the baby to the curb. I wouldn't take her back for all the money in the world if I were you. I know ...you have a baby together. She hasn't made any attempt at trying to see him though. She's done! Period! Raise your son in the proper manner and go on with your own life. I hope you go through the proper procedures to make sure you have whole legal custody of your son and she cannot decide one day to come and take him from you. Of course we are hearing just your side of the story and like they say...there is yours, hers, and the truth. But from what you say, you sound logical and have a good head on your shoulders. BE CAREFUL with your heart! Do you want her to come back and someday do the same thing all over again? Keep her away at all costs!
2006-09-30 10:41:46 · answer #1 · answered by honeybee4u2c 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In her mind you are a bad person that confronted her about the affair. Lots of women don't like being put on the spot and caught in the act persay. Allow her to be angry, eventually she will realize how dumb it all is and not remember why she was mad at you in the first place. Your son is the most important issue here. You have him....you support him....so you keep him. If she wants anything to do with him then you decide. Always keep logs of when she visits and if she pays child support. Who knows...maybe down the road you two can sit and talk about all this. Just give her time to cool off and it will be ok. You, on the other hand, move on, she has, but be careful. Good Luck
2006-09-30 17:38:44 · answer #2 · answered by whisper_sass 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My guess is that she is mad at you because you used her child to hurt her. What she did was not right but denying a child his mother is worse. I'm sure there is a way that you could have handled things so that your son isn't hurt by your grief. The reason your son does not ask about his mother is because he knows that you are angry with her and he is afraid that if he talks about her that you will be angry at him as well. Your actions are doing more damage to your son than anything she has done. Call her and work something out so that your child is not permanently damaged by this. Don't kid yourself into believing that your son does not miss his mother. Regardless of what she has done to you she is still his mother and you are the one who chose her to be the mother of your child. Do not punish your son for your poor choices.
2006-09-30 17:41:28 · answer #3 · answered by B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her be she is the one who chose to leave you and your son. If she thinks that she will have a better life with some other guy than let her do that. She will regret it later. She will still have a son but, won't see him. I think hat you should go on and live your life. You and your son. Have son father son time. I don't know why she is pissed at you. She is the only one who knows.
2006-09-30 17:38:36 · answer #4 · answered by lblondie15 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because she got caught. Back into a corner and no way out. It sounds like she wanted to have her cake and eat it too. By the way good for you dumping her and keeping you son.
2006-09-30 20:11:20 · answer #5 · answered by Sexy-n-Hot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my god you deserve awhole lot better then her asshole self.besides that's just messed up if her son doesn't even ask for her then you guys are alot better off.i'm happy for you that you are so much better don't worry about her asshole self because she didn't love in you the first place just because i'm 19 don't mean i don't know how to love and what isn't love because i was in love with my fiance and he cheated on my *** if you read my question you'll realize that to.but whatever somethings just happen for a reason.anyways goodluck and i wish your son good luck as well in life and i hope he don't find a girl like his mother because i pray to god the girl he finds is awhole lot better and makes him feel better to.well good luck.
2006-09-30 17:41:39 · answer #6 · answered by Angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry for the bad news but well she is blind at the moment I think I would hae to say she had a lot of responsiblility when she was young and she came to be very strased and well I will thing that once she understand that you really do care about her I think that she will return to you but she is for now considerd t be blind
2006-09-30 17:38:25 · answer #7 · answered by abeshawiwe!! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the first person...you proved her wrong.
But you know you did the right thing, and you have your son. I give you props for that. ^_^
She's mabye regretting that she had the affair and she wants to blow off some anger on you?
Anyway, I hope everything goes well.
2006-09-30 17:39:09 · answer #8 · answered by La Reina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's pissed because you made her be accountable for her own actions and nobody likes to admit that they are wrong. It is easier for her to blame you and be angry at you than it would be for her to admit she is the one that screwed up. Do yourself a favor and forget it, take care of yourself and take care of your son, Karma will take care of your ex.
2006-09-30 17:50:28 · answer #9 · answered by sweetie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cuz shes got a problem. She knows she did wrong and shes taking it out on you. Im glad you got your son, she doesnt deserve him. Forget about her, concentrate on your son now.
2006-09-30 18:16:09 · answer #10 · answered by ~~ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋