Its mainly for chatting to women,theres no point in me going up to a woman if i have absolutely nothing to say.Plus i struggle to talk to friends as well,like i said most of the time my mind is blank and i have nothing to say.PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME,THIS IS MY BIGGEST PROBLEM IN LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-30 08:46:53 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Sociology
Simple. Ask her something about herself, then you won't have to have anything in your own mind, and she'll think you're attentive. Although I'm sat home alone on a Saturday night, so don't listen to me.
2006-09-30 08:49:17 · answer #1 · answered by Andy R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are very simple ways of keeping a conversation going. First of all you make a simple comment to break the ice, e.g. "Nice here isn't it?" If you use an environmental cue, e.g. the temperature/weather/time of day/actual place you have started a conversation on something you can both talk about, as it is something you are currently sharing. As someone talks you can easily invite further conversation by using simple question words such as "why?" "how?" "really?" "when?" and phrases such as "why's that?" "did you like that?"
When conversations lull and your question words either stop working as you have exhausted all avenues, or one or both of you is bored or at least appears to be, don't try to be clever, just be yourself.
The easiest way to choose how to continue the conversation is to know what you want to know about your conversational partner. If you want to know how many brothers they have, where they like to hang out, or what music they like, ask!!! Ask one question, listen to what they say, and use some question words, or offer your own anecdotes or preferences. The other person will have their own agenda and will have plenty of things to ask you and say to you too so it won't be a one way struggle.
Also remember, girls spend a much larger portion of their lives talking and communicating than guys do, so they will generally find conversation easier and be happy to chat away.
Don't panic, and don't worry too much about pauses, just don't let them grow into awkward silences. Girls don't generally mind a shy guy, and as for your mates - well the same tricks will work. You know what they like, just start babbling about it, be it the lastest xbox 360 game, the cars you like, or who won on the footie.
I'm sure you'll be a little chatterbox in no time!
2006-09-30 16:38:09 · answer #2 · answered by old_but_still_a_child 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. I never have anything to say either. I'm a really funny guy, but other than the occasional quick wit, I'm all out. After some inner searching, I realised that I really don't want to talk. I realised that I am just comfortable in my own little space and being outgoing does not come naturally to me at all. An outgoing person is energized by conversation. An introverted person is exhausted by conversation. However, introverted people (believe it or not) tend to be funnier, more intuitive and aware of the details in life. I understand your dilema, but make peace with yourself first, and THEN try to improve your conversation skills. You might find it easier.
2006-09-30 15:58:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try and be more confident and talking will just come naturaly.
No small talk about the weather and stuff - that's just boring. The conversation with women should flow, it can't be just you talking, she will respond and ask you things too.
Confidence in a man is attractive - just not cocky, arrogant full of themselves. That's a big turn off.
So just try and go for it and think screw it if it doesn't work. Plan things to talk about with girls you meet like...... if you wanted to chat to a girl in a club, smile at them first vefore talking to them. If they smile back then go and speak to her, if she's all stuck up or not interested she will ignore you and you'll know not to waste your time on her.
Just DON'T buy girls drinks - only when you KNOW they're interested, there are far too many women who just want free drinks all night. It's true. They'll see you as an easy target.
Good luck and don't put yourself down!
2006-09-30 15:53:24 · answer #4 · answered by Vickyandbump 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Women are God's most complicated creatures, even though they all have very simple minds. First, stare at her breasts until she notices and then comment on how you can't read what it says on her shirt. That is after you are together, before that, buy her favorite version of "Trivial Pursuit." Memorize every question in that game and you will never have dead air again. Ask her a basic question like, "How many licks...?" Have new questions form in your mind about her answers. This will work until you are ready to get laid and then she'll just, "Moo..."
2006-09-30 15:56:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay mate, I was you 20 years ago, the problem is you are to worried about what people think about you. relax, be yourself and try not to be too deparate, Be a decent guy and the right girl will magically show up, Try going to a nightclass or some kind of activity you enjoy where you can meet like minded people. Nightclubs are rubbish for meeting women if youre not MR Hansome (like me) But if you can met girls on a one to one level they will see you for you. Relax mate Enjoy you life, dont worry, it will be cool for you.
2006-09-30 16:00:50 · answer #6 · answered by Thornsey 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
can you remember the word FORM? F stands for family/friends ask her if she has any brothers etc, women love to talk about kids, do not interrupt her she will want to tell you about her mother as well, be a good listener and let her tell you about the family member who is in hospital or armed forces etc.O stands for occupation, ask her what she does for a living, again listen try to nod your head in the right places. R stands for recreation, ask her about holidays and hobbies, ----- and lastly M stands for me this is your turn, keep it brief and she will think you are the best talker in the world and will want to talk to you again.
2006-10-01 17:03:59 · answer #7 · answered by melas 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
personally i hate small talk, i yawn if someone bores me with this time wasting nonesense, if you want to make a contact or strike up a conversation get a pen and paper and go to jokes and riddles, i have learnt loads of funny things it cheers me up and as iam cr@p at remembering jokes by writing them down i keep them in the kitchen and pick them up and read them so i have lots of jokes in my head waiting for the appropriate moment.
lets face it if you can make a woman double up with laughter, she will definately be attentive (avoid the crude jokes about women though) you may get a slap.
2006-09-30 16:42:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow. I am sure you have something in your head or you wouldn't have thought to write this question. maybe the "fake it till you make it" method would work for you. I do that when i sing out loud..i PRETEND to be a singer and then i seem to be able to do it tolerably. if i actually try to sing it comes out badly. It takes the pressure off and that is what it seems you have on you...pressure. if you can't just chill on your own, make it a game.
2006-09-30 16:05:20 · answer #9 · answered by same here 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her where she is from.... how many brothers and sisters she has.... what she does for a living (or goes to school)... what is her major? Does she watch "Dancing With the Stars" or whatever shows you know something about.... That should get a conversation started.
2006-09-30 15:51:40 · answer #10 · answered by farahwonderland2005 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋