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and over the last few months noticed he was speaking to over 70 females, some of which had contact numbers next to them, so at first i asked questions indirectly, do you speak to other women on the net etc..., it would really hurt me if you did, ... he said he did, but he just tells them hes taken etc.. not whether they flirt with him etc... and he had deleted them, and said he would give me his password, not knowing i already knew it. I said no, its ok, and have left it for a few months, until recently, I checked and is back to his old tricks, and there now appearing again, one by one! I dont know what to do, any advice? i've asked him if he still has girls mailing him, and he says no, i should trust him. I then mentioned that i've had this done before, and cant help getting paranoid..... :-S We dont live together, and I suppose we have a longish distance relationship, well 200 miles, and see each other every 5 days. can anyone help? am i stressing for no reason

2006-09-30 07:51:52 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

I dont speak to other men, no

2006-09-30 07:56:59 · update #1

23 answers

set yourself up with a new email address unknown to him. then make contact and see how loyal he is

2006-09-30 07:56:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3 0

oh dear, sticky situation hey?
its verrrrrry unlikely that those 70 women are friends. And the fact that hes now lying to you is even worse! So, what you should do is ask him for his password, and if he hesitates you will know that something is up.
Still, even if he ends up being innocent its not right that he speaks to so many women, somethings bound to happen.
You don't really want to hear this, because i know you probably have very deep feelings about him.
But, seems to me that hes not right for you and i expect maybe the distance is whats causing the problem.
Get a guy you can trust, you shouldn't have to be paranoid, because trust is one of the most important things in a relationship, and if there isnt any, is it really worth all the fuss?
My decision is that you ditch the guy, but then its up to you to decide the next step. I hope you make the right one

2006-09-30 08:07:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I would like to say that it is all Innocent as the net is the way of the world and many people chat to people and it is Innocent, but then you have to think about the distance between you and the time you spend together and if you have seen the emails then you will have seen what is in them and how far they go, can you assess them and tell if they are just Innocent and maybe just a wee bit of computer flirting. at the end of the day it is up to you what you do, try getting out a wee bit more you never know you may even meet the man of your dreams a wee bit closer to home.

2006-09-30 08:02:44 · answer #3 · answered by ooooh look @ me, lol 3 · 0 0

I would be concerned if he was in contact with just one person , let alone up to 70 !!!!!

How has he got in contact with them in the first place ?

I would advise against pretending to be someone else to catch him , unless you are sure that you can handle the truth .

Own up to knowing his password and checking his e-mails , and tell him he`s not changed and can`t be trusted . And its over .

You really should resolve this issue as soon as possible , you will end up getting more stressed if you don`t .

2006-09-30 08:33:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Honey I've been in your shoes and just found myself getting stinged along for over a year.then one fine day he's got her name all over the net he's marrying her.
So he is doing it to you slowly but surely he's gonna bin you and you can't say he's all your's ok.
I was shocked about what was going.I though I was the only one in his life till he just blanked me.
front him and do it in such a way that you know for sure where you stand and then move on because long distance is gonna be making you lose him.
You want to put a bet with me honey,he is just using you.so be very careful and don't be a fool for you deserve better.
I wish you stop getting paranoid and the best thing you can do is your better alone then unhappy.
I'm much happy without him,that's not right but it's ok.
yes you are very very stressed for no fault of your's honey.stop think and move on and find someone who is close to you and who love's you only and who is not going behind your back.
think about it honey,i've been there and know the hag you get for not being there at the beck and call.so move on.

2006-09-30 08:09:14 · answer #5 · answered by mariolla oneill 5 · 0 0

There are very many people who have internet friendships without having any desire to take things further. The difficulty will come when he either finds out that you have been checking up on him, or if the paranoia gets too much for you to handle.

You know him better than anyone on here, so you should know whether he is capable of taking things further with any of these contacts.

I will keep my fingers crossed that everything works out for the best.

SS3 xx

2006-09-30 08:05:34 · answer #6 · answered by silversilver3 2 · 1 0

properly it really is a good theory to modify your password each now and again. possibly he became aggravating his password were compromised? possibly he had only study an editorial on hackers or some thing and needed a better safeguard password? Why do you want to carry close his digital mail password besides?

2016-11-25 04:14:48 · answer #7 · answered by zito 4 · 0 0

Just so we are clear... you are secretly reading his e-mails and you have trust issues with him?!

Take a look in the mirror honey, paranoid or not - you can't tar every guy out there with the same brush!!!

I don't think you should have a boyfriend at all, until you can sort out your own self esteem and trust issues.

2006-09-30 12:21:44 · answer #8 · answered by rabbit rhodes 1 · 0 0

What is he saying to the other women in these emails? The content of the email is what you should be concerned with.
If it is sexual, than this is unacceptable.
70 women Friends is too many, one or two would be fine. Do some more investigating, he could have an addiction to on line chatting

2006-09-30 08:24:58 · answer #9 · answered by blondie 2 · 0 0

No you have good reason i think. I am single and i have girls on my friends list. I will flirt sometimes but if i was with someone i would stay in touch with them but not flirt and i would also let her have my password. I was in a ldr 250 miles apart and its difficult to trust. Especially if he does things you see for yourself. gud luk to ya xx

2006-09-30 08:00:52 · answer #10 · answered by paulcartwheel 3 · 0 0

He was willing to give you the password seems like it has nothing to hide. But if you feel like you can't trust him just don't be with him.... a relationship won't work without trust. If something bugs me too much like that I would leave.

2006-09-30 08:00:30 · answer #11 · answered by STARS 3 · 0 0

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