Husband lied?

Question

My husband lied to me about the stupidist thing. He bought a dell DJ from dell.com but he told me that his mom bought it for him. Actually when he first told me about it, he said he didn't know who was sending him a Dell DJ but when it came yesterday, he said his mom sent it. I don't know why but I did not believe him at all. I checked his email and there was an order confirmation from dell with his credit card, and the shipping and billing to him. I could care les if he bought it. We have looked at many MP3 players at stores including IPODS. My reaction is always the same, if ya want it, buy it. He never did. Now he buys it behind my back and says it was a present from his mom. I am so tripped out by this. I have yet to confront him since it just happened and he is at work, but I am so pissed. Why would he lie? Now I feel he lies about much, much more. Can and should I trust him?

Just for reference-I don't get mad if buys things. He is a huge car enthusiast and a big gamer. He usually tells me when he wants stuff even if it's expensive. We talk about it, look at the finances and decide. But for little stuff we just buy it. I don't really care what he buys as long as we have money in the bank, which has never been a problem.

Answer 1

Ha...if your pissed off and I would be....cal his mom. thank her so very much for the gift she sent to your husband....do NOT reveal you found the email because it says you dont trust him. Play the game girl! When his mother is stumped that is the card you play. The famous"Oh gee I guess I miss understood what my husband was trying to say" will get you where you want to go. You hold the cards...now how you run with them is the important part. You shouldnt be lied to...even over the trivial crap. Remember that.

Answer 2

Sometimes men find they need to lie about the smallest stupidest things I guess to see if they can get away with it. I can't say wether u can trust him r not. This isn't a big thing he lied about that's what makes it just crazy to even lie in the first place. Has he done things are said things in the past to make you doubt him. If so got w/ what ur gut tells u. Usually it's always right.... Hire urself a PI if u think it's that bad and u really need answers. R hell just go PI urself. Follow him around and see if he's lieing about other things.

Answer 3

remember that this is your husband and not a child. I don't agree with him lying to you about it but obviously he felt the need to lie. Maybe he felt it was something you could not afford as a couple but wanted very badly so on the spur of the moment ordered and then felt really bad about doing it. It sounds like you are a very young couple. I think this is a small lie and not worth getting a divorce over. When you approach him and ask him why he lied he is probably going to get defensive. You are a couple do you not get to see the credit card bills? I get to see all of our bills even if they are only in my husbands name. I think if you approach it in the right way things will be fine but you will have to use a lot of tact.

Answer 4

1. confront him about it and have a huge argument that will only make things worse.

or

2. confront him about it and tell him you are not angry but you would have appreciated it if he didn't lie to you about it.

I think you are upset with him because he bought it and he doesn't want you to get mad so he lied and told you his mom got it. How do you react when he buys things for himself? Do you get mad all the time so now he has to lie to you about it? If he wastes money that you need for other things then he might be selfish and you should talk about buying things that you both agree on. Remember marriage is a two-way street and you both have to compromise.

Answer 5

This is a small thing but I have to wonder why he would lie about it also. Confront him and see what he says. Ask him why he lied about it that you know the truth. And then ask him does he lie about other things. If he see's that you have busted him he might come clean. Lieing is not the way it goes. Being honest does. Maybe he lied cause he thought you might get mad about him getting one. Who knows what men think sometimes.

Answer 6

Unfortunately, some men are just like children. No matter how many times you say its ok, he still lies when he buys something. Maybe he paid more for it than he thought you would approve of. Who knows. I would tell him what you found (the email) and let him know you dont appreciate his lying and this may cause you to mistrust him. Call him on it whenever you do catch him in lies. Maybe he will stop eventually.

Answer 7

Confront him right away! I don't want to go into the "can and should you trust him" area, because I personally cannot stand liars, I've been married to one man who lied all the time about everything! I don't know your husband so I don't want to make sweeping assumptions, but I just do not like being lied to, who does? I'd find out what's going on asap, before it drives you nuts! Then find out why he felt he couldn't tell you truth.

Answer 8

Yeah, you are sooo right. When they lie about trivial things that do not matter, that means they have a deceitful nature!! So, I know this is going to sound bad, but you need to evaluate this relationship alltogether, because if he is lying about this, then how dependable will he be when the big stuff comes up????

Answer 9

Buy a Thank You card and when he gets home, insist he sign it and tell him you will mail it to his mother. If he goes for it, mail it. To him. And include a copy of that email you found. Add a note inside the card that reads: "You've been busted in your lie!"

Answer 10

Yes, u can and should trust him... Becoz this is the relation which stays alive by the belief.... It's ur own tactics that how should u deal with the matter to force him to tell the truth...
I think it's possible by nurishing love in ur heart