does anyone think it's ok to date interracially?

Question

i'm an older frmale that is attracted to black males, i want to date one, but my two children are not very happy about it. they both say
it's my choice, buy have told me in the past that they would strongly disapprove of me doing this if i ever decided to. what should i do, i have met someone i like and he is black, and i want to date him, but i'm afraid my boys will disown me if i do. i'm a widow, i'v dated white men, and can't find happiness and i'm attracted to this guy he likes me and i like him. we both like each other a lot. i want to go with our feelings, but i don't want to cause alleanation with my two sons. i'm caught in a big web of confusion
here, help.

Answer 1

bet u r!
sit those kids down and explain ur entitled 2 some happiness 2.
give them a time limit 2 get used 2 the idea, it's ur life.
u go 4 it lovey and make urself happy.

Answer 2

This is your life and you are the one who is in control....Your boys have to consider about what makes you happy. If they try to boss you around and tell you how you should live your life than they are just being selfish. Or maybe because they doesn't want anybody to take their father's place....All you need to do, is to communicate with them and let them know your true feelings for this guy....after all, they are your children and definitely they would understand. Good conversation is always the key to solve any disputes or things like that. Black men are damn HOT!! and there's nothing wrong if you find them attractive or want to date them.... In my opinion Color of the skin shouldn't be a obstacle if you like somebody . Don't get stressed and go for this relationship if it feels right.

Answer 3

The only thing we are after in this life is happiness, right?
If you think by being with this man, you can find it, why not try?
If you have fear of being alienated, perhaps that's the price we have to pay? We know things always come with consequences, so it depends on your own priority. Not being alienated means more to you or being with this guy? If either of them causes grief then you should approach your children and let them know you need an opportunity for yourself, not at the expense of them. Clarify it. Try to find synergistic solution instead of conventional win-lose paradigm. Talk with your children and try to see why they would be unhappy about it. Once you are clear.. maybe you can help them relieve their fear?
Look the answer within... Just listen to your heart with an open mind. Whatever happens, it happens for a reason :) All the best to you.

Answer 4

going by your question, seems your sons are grown? Personally I see nothing wrong what two consenting adults want to do, its none of anyones buisness, and those who would get all bent out of shape have issues...Your sons gave you no grief when you dated a white guy?...or did they...We can't make people see things the way we do individually, and that is where the problem lies. You could talk till your blue in the face, and it may not matter, your sons are going to think the way they do...But your the one who is responsible for your happiness....And you are the only one who can make that choice....Your boys are living there lives, and you may be their mother, but your still a woman who would like to be treated like one....So you may have to go with your heart and hope when/if the boys meet this man, they will see why you like him....good luck to you...

Answer 5

There is nothing wrong with interracial relationships. Regardless of a man's ethnic make up you need to choose a good man. There are lots of losers out there of all colors and shades. If you find a good man you should go for it. Depending on your families and your backgrounds you may face additional strain on your relationship if you come across discrimination and bigotry, but the only way for society to learn to change is for couples to have the courage to show that interracial relationships can work. Love is colorless. Best of luck to you. You are the mother and it is never too late to teach your children. Your boys will have to make their own choices and if they place distance between you because of who you choose to be with then you should place that burden upon them and let them carry it. You have a life to live.

Answer 6

You are a grown a-- woman. Why do you care what you adult, (need to get their own lives ) sons think? I could understand if your children were minors and you wanted to be sensitive to their feelings. You can't let anyone tell you how to live your life, you need to live your own life on your own terms. If your sons cannont accept this, then this is their problem. You are lucky that this man is still even interested because your insecurity/immaturity would drive most men away.

Answer 7

First of all, I know that you are concerned about what your children think. However, don't let their prejudices guide your happiness. If you really like this man, then go for it. You are entitled to be happy and entitled to love and affection. If your children have a problem with it, then that is their problem. You are their mother and they will eventually get over it. Until then, enjoy the happiness that this man brings you. It sounds to me like you deserve it. Good Luck.

Answer 8

First of all - YES!!!!
But 2nd and more importantly - rascism and hatred of other races is taught. Your boys learned these attitudes and you need to seriously evaluate if you had anything to do with these beliefs. If your boys are young, and their Father died, they're not likely to welcome any man into their lives. My suggestion to you is this - Date, and have fun. Begin to heal your wounds but do not under any circumstances, bring this man or any man around your children.
I understand you may have needs that need to be met, but you are a mother and you need to heal your family first!!!!! These boys are going to grow up into men, and if you aren't careful - they will grow up full of hate. It sounds like they are halfway there already! This is dangerous - why don't you try family counseling? This way - it's an outsider that will approach the subject of you dating. These boys need to understand that you have needs as a woman, but they may be too young and too hurt to readily accept another man in their life. Especially - a man of a different race. This is not fair to your boys and it damn sure ain't fair to this man!!!!!! Heal your family and yourself first!

Answer 9

If it's real love between the 2 of you go ahead.How old are your sons? If you need their approval for each man you might never end up with one. One day they'll "leave" you to have their own life and what's then? They might not have time for their lonely Mama...Black or white stick to him if he's Mr. Right!

Answer 10

I all so found it very difficult to date interracial at my age IE: 42 some of my family and friends at first did not like it ( i found there true colors so to speak ), some of them came around those that did not i told to get a life and do nothing but date black women hope to find my soulmate someday .......good luck and don't get discouraged