to start a potential relationship
2006-09-29 16:48:58 · 23 answers · asked by cedar 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Here are a few ways:
See them at a lesbian dance or bar or party. (GAY ones don't count - lots of STR8 girls go there to have fun without fending off the meat market! LOL)
Learn to recognize lesbian jewelry (rainbows, triangles, interlocking venus symbols, labyris-shaped earrings or necklaces, stuff from www.loveandpride.ca) If she's wearing any of them, chances are.....
She's wearing Doc Marten boots with her Laura Ashley dress (ok, maybe more of a 90s thing!) LOL - chances are .....
Her friends - if she has a lot of dykey friends, chances are....
Her music interests. If ALL she listens to is Indigo Girls, Ani diFranco, and other lesbian troubadors, chances are....
Her level of familiarity with the tv show The L-Word. If she can detail every episode, name every actress, or OWNS a season on DVD, chances are.....
Her theoretical gender analysis. If she's and ardent feminist AND doesn't date guys, chances are.....
Her spelling. If she uses boi, womyn or wimmin, and other gender re-spellings, she might just be a feminist, but chances are.....
If she's 29 and she wears a Rainbow Brite t-shirt, chances are....
If she's 29 and wears a shirt that says "2QT2BSTR8", or "Dip Me in Honey.....", or "People say we're too pretty to be lesbians", or make references to their proficiency with power tools, chances are..... LOL
If she's a regular attender a the Michigan Womyn's Festival, she may be a straight feminist, but chances are....
If she has a subscription to Curve, Diva, Girlfriends, or the Advocate, chances are.....
(If she has a subscription to On Our Backs, or Lesbian Connection....she IS, with about 99% certainty!)
If she's a subscriber to The Pink Sofa, she better be!
If she speaks knowledgeably about the minutiae of lesbian subculture, chances are....
Getting the picture? ;o)
2006-09-29 17:17:09 · answer #1 · answered by ladyfraser04 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Ok, look, most of the "clues" (ladyfraser) gave are probably ok..but they're not pure rules of thumb.
There are those like me who half the time simply "blend in." I don't usually "give off signals." Heck I had a lesbian friend who was convinced I was straight because I didn't listen exclusively, or even heavily to "lesbian troubadors, " I own absolutely NO "gay" jewelery, I gave up wearing combat boots when I left the military, I have a son, I was married to a man, I don't much like televised team sports except for hockey and the occassional cricket match. (And I'm American...go figure)
My partner actually met me through my "friend", (the one who was convinced I was straight)
My "now" partner was my friend's ex. We became friends, I got involved working at a GLBT community center and well, as the story goes, one thing lead to another.
My soft-butch partner and I have been together now for ten years.
2006-09-30 01:18:05 · answer #2 · answered by DEATH 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, either, and I am a lesbian, it is really hard to meet others that don't drink or smoke, except in a bar and I am not into bar scenes. I can't tell if a woman is interested in me, or not. So I just keep my distance from people. Sorry.
2006-09-30 11:11:36 · answer #3 · answered by spiritcavegrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Secret handshake. No, seriously, the subtle nuance of detecting sexual tension are as individual and varied as your fashion sense.
There are cultural-based body language indicators, like eye contact, smile, open gestures, seductively looking away after spying someone you like and battering eyelids, brushing up next to someone.
YOU JUST KNOW! Trust your instinct, go out on a limb and ask her for coffee. It's a simple, non-sexual gesture. If she does not respond, you've lost nothing. At least then, you'll know...
2006-09-29 23:55:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 1⤋
Come-on looks.
A girl would give a girl the same kind of a look a guy would give her if he wanted to bed her down.
If the girl fails to respond it means the other girl either moves on or needs to be more persuasive.
2006-09-29 23:52:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Dykedar. Gay clubs, Gay Bars, Anything with Gay in the title.
OK, Seriously, you just meet people (at the mall, McDonald's, Wal-mart, etc.) Plus, being in college helps.
2006-09-30 03:21:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well there is that certain thing called the gay-dar if you dont have it honey im very sorry. cause i can tell butch and non-butch women its just something that comes naturally as you are that lifestyle and you learn how to read people their comments on certains things and just plainly how they carry themselves around you how a person is reacts to you are they touchy or are they standoffish all theses things help me in telling if someone is gay wheter butch or not. but basically comes from that feeling you get from another person.
2006-09-29 23:53:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 3⤋
Like everyone else!! It is not like they want a "butch" as u say, and walk up to one and say hi "butch"
2006-09-29 23:51:26 · answer #8 · answered by ama5online 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
by opening the closet door? sorry just kidding- by body language and communication the same way anyone else starts a relationship.
2006-09-29 23:51:03 · answer #9 · answered by rwl_is_taken 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
My general rule is if a woman is flirting with you, she is interested. like anything else, take it slow and easy and you may find someone that you reaaly like that is interested in you.
If she runs scared or backs away, respect her space.
2006-09-30 00:24:25 · answer #10 · answered by magequill 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋