What do I do with my 8 month old daughter when she SCREAMS?

Question

I can't get anything done at home....I try to clean the kitchen, and she crawls in and tries to grab my calves. I put her in her playpen and she Shrieks this high-pitched, blood curdling scream. I can't get all the housework done while she is taking her naps.

Is this just a time in her life where she is generally fussy? I don't feel like she should be "disciplined" for what she is doing, because she isn't doing it intentionally.

She also hates being put into her crib at bedtime. She screams like crazy. I go in maybe every 10 minutes to check if she is okay, but don't do it just because she is crying.

Is this just a stage? I don't want to spoil her, and I don't want to punish for something she doesn't understand either.

Thanks for your help.

You are all giving me such great advice...I am laughing my guts out!

Answer 1

Your daughter is at the developmental stage called "object permanence," where she's realized that when you leave, you're still THERE, just in a different room -- so she wants to be with you!
Before 8-9 months, babies just sort of forget you when you leave, which is why she seems more fussy now than before. But she can get used to it.
You could work on it by playing hide and seek or peek-a-boo with her, and then gradually work up to going behind a wall or around a corner and then coming back.
Or you could just buy some ear plugs, put her in the playpen with some of her favorite toys, put on some soothing music, and let her scream it out. She will stop, eventually. (It just feels really mean!) Getting her used to being in the playpen alone for a while will really help with bedtime too.

Answer 2

Crying and screaming are two different things. If a baby Screams I would think that it needs some sort of comfort.Some of the worst advice I was ever given when I was a new mother was to let my baby scream when he woke in the middle of the night at around eight months. I did it once and he screamed for almost an hour before I realized that I did not care what anyone else thought, his comfort and security was and should be the most important thing. Housework will wait, or someone else can help, or you might have to just have a messy house for a while. About a year after this happened my son had juvenile on set diabetes and had to start taking insulin shots. He took a great deal of attention and care after that. But I still remember that one timeI let him cry.

Answer 3

For what it's worth , I know many people have different opinions on this, but i'll just give you my thoughts ^_~

i think you are right, you don't want to spoil the baby, but you don't want to punish her for something she doesnt understand........when kids are that young, there isnt much of anything they understand or can really help, and all that is left for them is "Learning"
i think if you were to hold her pick her up, give her something "Every time she cries" later on she will "Learn" that all she has to do is cry to get something,
but you don't want to ignore her either....

Before bedtime, try spending "Quiet time" or sometehing with her, hold her and cuddle her for awhile, till she calms down, talk to her a bit, etc.... try to put her into bed, she might start crying, pat her head or give her a kiss or talk to her or something, that way, she knows that you are there, and go ahead and let her alone for awhile......
I was asking my mother about this once, what she had done with us when we were younger, and she said she would let us cry, but occassionaly come in if we were really crying, give us a toy or a teddy bear, and stand there for a minute, and then leave again, making sure not to pick us up, eventually, we learned that crying wasnt going to get us out of the crib, that when we were put in the crib, we were there to stay and sleep whether we liked it or not......

i agree with this idea, and have talked to other parents that feel the same, (but again everyone has their own opinions)

all babies know how to do that little is to cry, it's not her fault or anything, but she will be getting bigger and older, and she will be learning from things that you teach her now......

i feel it's almost the same as when you have a 2 yr old throwing a tantrum, yes you can freak out and yell at the toddler and get upset, but when you think about it, all the 2 yr old is trying to do is get attention in a negative way, sometimes getting upset would reinforce it more, causing them to throw more tantrums, i always felt it was best to let the 2 yr old throw a tantrum , (unless it's disturbing others, like at a store, or at a friends house etc.......) and not say anything, or even look their direction, the kid cant yell forever, and will eventually learn, that throwing tantrums, will not get them any attention or do them any good that it's just a waste of effort.......

so yeah, thats just my opinion, yeah it also is a stage remember she still is only 8 months old, you cant blame her for these things, all you can do is start teaching her things for when she turns 1 and 2 when they start to learn to know better ^_^

Answer 4

Your little sweetie is aching for a friend and she's directing all of that energy at you. Spend time playing with her - hold her in your lap and explore, or whatever. 30 minutes once or twice a day will make a huge difference. Get an affordable baby backpack and pack her around while you're working. Her screaming will stop and after a few times she'll get more comfortable playing on her own. Before you know it, she'll outgrow it. If you need extra time to do chores, see if you can get a neighbor to watch her for an hour or two. Also, get some playdates going and that will help ease her desire to be with and interact with others.

Answer 5

I don't believe that if you ignore her eventually she will give up as someone else suggested. In fact, I beleive the opposite will happen. She needs your attention at this age. I think you're absolutely right that she shouldn't be discaplined. She's just being a baby, and needs all the love you can give her. Babies that have excessive love and attention grow up to be more secure and cry less. I know it's hard, but try to put your housework on hold. Do as much as you can when she's napping, and in the evenings. She wants you right now that's all. Just love her like I'm sure you are. God Bless

Answer 6

Mother maybe your daughter is shrieking for some attention from you. It could be she may not gotten enough feeding, such as milk or formula, food. It could be a numerous amount of things.

Try singing to her. talking to her , when you do this she may respond Give her a hug, Depending upon the time you place her down for her nap, sponge her off a little bit after lunch or morning breakfast. You'll be surprise what the outcome would be for you.

Work scheduling around her given her some toys at that age to keep her busy while you're being busy too.

Have a great time with your daughter.

Answer 7

The thing is that you aren't a good parent if you don't know what to do in my opinion. Smack your kid on the spinal cord just hard enough to make a sting. She will cry and do it once or twice more but when you hit your children they stop. When i was little i was a good boy because whenever i did something wrong my mom would pinch my neck or smack me on the back. Now look at me an A+ student who can pick up over 70 pounds. The thing is just saying stop it and sending them into the corner is stupid. Imagine if she screamed at an officer and got beaten down because he needed his quota done when shes old enough to drink.

Answer 8

At 8 months a child is experiencing the ability to be mobile and explore. They hate to be caged in.

Try getting one of those corrals like they have on the Rug Rats cartoon.

Make sure baby has some good toys to play with. Pots and Pans and a big ole wooden or plastic spoon help keep baby busy.

Answer 9

This is normal behavior for an eight mongh old. Maybe you could just put her in the same room that you are cleaning in and have her occupied with toys are something. In reference to her screaming when it is bedtime, you give her a kiss turn out the light and leave her alone. She is conditioning you if you continue to come in and are going to establish a pattern of whenever she wants you all she has to do is scream. This will pass in time.

Answer 10

When my babies were little, they didn't cry because I was doing house work, they cried because they wanted attention. This would be a good time to spend quality time with your daughter. Your house will wait. Get your hubby to help with the chores. Your daughter will only be 8 months old for a short time. Enjoy it while you can. In a few short years she will be wanting to borrow the car and run around with her friends. Make a meaningful bond with her now. Oh .. and don't jump and run when ever she cries. Sometimes babies just have a fussy time and need to fuss.