my fiance thinks im yelling for the hell of it,im trying to tell her that the kids dont need to have candy and stuff when they get home from school,they get into there stuff that is for there lunch,they have snacks for after dinner,by wed we have to buy more stuff for there lunch.shes on diability,and im off work due to lack of work,its a money thing,let alone a health thing.
then i did something really stupid like ask the kids to help do simple chores around the house before they go out and play didnt happen,im doing it all,is because they are not my kids or everybody just dont care cause ill do it.she has a 6 year old that screams at the top of her lungs when she dont get her way,even outside were the neighbors are even looking.THIS IS REALLY TEARING OUR RELATIONSHIP UP TO WERE I WANT TO LEAVE HER AND BE ON MY OWN.any ideas?caus etalking to her isnt helping.
2006-09-29 14:10:41 · 9 answers · asked by albert s 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She doesn't sound like a very good parent, which means she won't be a good wife.
Leave and send a post card.
2006-09-29 14:22:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOw. You're a good guy and I'm sorry you're going through all of this. There is a lack of order, and it sounds to be on her part and with her parenting. My husband thought I was too lax with my daughter he gained when we married last year. Your blended family needs a plan. You are on the right track but again, you all need more order and respect. Ask her to come up with a plan since she seems to have a problem with yours. Let her discipline that little screamer. If she will do NEITHER, then maybe you should consider removing yourself from the situation but I doubt that is the best idea as that is YOUR HOME TOO, now. Have you prayed about it? God sees and knows the problem and the solution. Hope you consider it, it works. Blessings, grace and above all PEACE to you. Hang in there. Also, call some temp agencies. They can help you with work.
p.s. try to say it without yelling, too
2006-09-29 14:54:43 · answer #2 · answered by Sleek 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stress and plenty of it. You have it coming at you from all sides and nowhere to turn. Yelling is a form of stress release, and as much as you dont mean anything by it really, others see it differently. It sounds to me as you need to get any job for now to get out of that house even if its just for a little while, to get away before something happens. Any job is just temporary for now but it gets you out of the house picture and it will really help in more ways than one. Then when things calm down a bit,talk to her about the kids doing chores and such,. Things will work out with a little time even though they look a little bleak right now. Good luck
2006-09-29 14:23:40 · answer #3 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, i can see about 30 red flags that say you should now marry this woman. i really hope your not so naive to think that thing will get better after you get married. Sounds to me like you need to leave before the ring is on her finger. Shamefully, you'll probably ignore this good advice and marry her anyways because you're too scared to be labeled a jerk, or because you "love" her. Ask your friends to give you an honest opinion of this girl. They see the relationship from a non-biased point of view, and that is the way you need to see it.
2006-09-29 14:22:18 · answer #4 · answered by me 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if they are not your kids well seeing that you do pay bills and support them when you do have work then your there parent and for her im disabled and i get off my *** and still do everything in the house because my husband worse off than me but even he helps kids dont need candy and junk thats just stupid as hell and they can help around the house and if they cant help than they dont need to go out and play you are being treated like **** and you need to make a stand stop yelling sit down tell her whats on your mind if she doent listen then walk because thAT IS TRUELY ****
2006-09-29 14:23:25 · answer #5 · answered by mz.thang 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
did u know about her daughter b4 u moved in?
i mean did u know what u were getting urself in? if the answer is no than get out. ur relationship is over.
but if answer is yes and u r ready to do what it takes fro ur loved one than1) remember u and her r the bases of this family.so u i mean BOTH of u make desicions.2)give a kid a break. she's only six and probably spoiled by her mom.and seems like she went through a divorce or somebody's loss. so take it easy and build instead of ruining
2006-09-29 14:19:10 · answer #6 · answered by lina l 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all; do you love her and think that the relationship is worth saving? You do not have to be married to attend couple's counseling. If money is an issue, there are support groups and church. As a single mother; I have to agree with your morals. If she is not willing to go with your ideas or even meet you half way; you may be better off walking away. Although I recommend you stay to give the children stability. Stand your ground and insist they follow your rules. It took me two months to discipline my son after my husband left. I would let him throw his tantrums in the house as long as I knew he wasn't hurting himself. Eventually, he learned that mommy would not give in and conformed to my rules. I wish you all the luck and strength.
2006-09-29 14:22:38 · answer #7 · answered by avsup 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-12 17:37:12 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I couldn't stand it. I would have to leave. I hope you can work things out, but doesn't sound like she wants it too.
2006-09-29 14:16:09 · answer #9 · answered by wayouthere 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋