Is it just my husband, or do all married men refuse to wash dishes?

Question

I'm trying to get him to wash the dishes because he is the one who uses them. He is a stay-at-home dad and I work full time outside of the home. I wash the dishes every night and always come home to a sink full of dishes. I like to spend time with the baby until she goes to sleep, and then I have to wash the dishes, wash the bottles and do my homework (I am also a half-time student) and usually don't get to sleep until 2 AM. I was just wondering if there are any men out there who wash their own dishes.

Answer 1

I wash dishes every day

Answer 2

My husband does when he is home. During the summer he works 65+ hours a week and has no time other than to sleep. So i do all the household chores, but during the winter he gets laid off and does all the chores. Sometimes we do dishes together but we dont work well together we both have our own way of doing things.
I think it is your husbands job to wash the dishes, he is the stay-at-home dad, but you shouldn't tell him that since they are his dishes he needs to wash them, he may get upset because staying at home with a baby is hard work too!

Answer 3

There are plenty of men who wash dishes and don't think nothing of it. There are some men who hate washing dishes. I don't know why you feel you should do this every night when it's obvious that it's too much for you. Talk it over with him, but don't talk to him like he's doing you a favor if he washes the dishes b/c their his dishes, too. If he don't get it, stop washing them. Do other things in the house that you can do and for goodness sake, please stop staying up so late. That's not healthy for you. Work smarter, not harder. They pile up enough, he'll be forced to do them since he uses them the most.

Answer 4

Look for something that your husband does that you're grateful for. If you can't find anything, you need to either need to make him contribute more, or make him pay. Also, are you upset because he does too little, or you do too much? Either way, figure out how to distribute evenly. Maybe he hates the dishes, but will do the laundry, or make the bed, or whatever. I wash dishes, but I don't put the food away. I make the bed (sometimes), but I don't feed the dog. Every once in a while, I'll do something I don't like (ironing, cleaning, etc.) if I know my wife is overwhelmed. But, all things equal and everything running smoothly, we both do our part.

Answer 5

Normally, I think it should be the wife. But there are always exceptions.

If he is a Stay at Home Dad, part of his role is housework! Whether he likes it or not, he is a househusband and his responsibilities including cooking, cleaning - and yes dishes!

I wouldn't put up with it. It might be easier said than done, but if you come to a sink full of dishes - leave them.

You may want to get a dishwasher. This could be for your benefit - or his.

I hope he has dinner ready when you get home.

Answer 6

I work full time and also clean house, cook all the meals and wash the dishes for my wife (out of choice).

I would suggest you take a long look at what your so called stay at home Dad is doing. If he is daring to suggest that he has the same 'job' as a stay at home Mum then he needs to take ALL the responsibilities including cleaning, washing dishes and cooking that most stay at home Mums operform. If not then he is a stay at home lazy ***.

Answer 7

If it weren't for my husband, the dishes wouldn't get done. I HATE, HATE, HATE washing dishes! When I was a kid, that was the chore my step-dad insisted I do because I was a girl--I wanted to mow the lawn. So, as a stay-at-home-Mom, I cook, clean, do laundry, AND MOW THE LAWN, and my husband, who is in the military, washes the dishes after dinner every night. He's a keeper!

Answer 8

I know of one, but he's not mine.

One of the tips found on couchsurfing.com is to always offer to do the dishes for your host family, because that is everyone's least favorite chore.

Perhaps you guys can figure out a way to bring in occasional maid service just for dishes - or for a couple of days a week to do other things so he has time to do dishes while taking care of the kids. Maybe if you're home on the weekends, he can get a part-time job to pay for that.

Failing that, how's the recycling program in your community? Ditch the china and get plastic plates and cups and silverware!

Answer 9

A stay at home dad and he doens't do the dishes?

you may not be able to change him, but try trading another chore for that one. There are some things people just hate to do, and since you do them everynight, he has no reason to change. my husband refuses to do laundry or put his laundry away. (he does do the dishes)

I would suggest investing in a dishwasher. or leaving them in the sink until maggots show up. Maybe he'll get the point.

Answer 10

It's just your hubby. And because you allow him to treat you like that by accepting his behavior, it's your own fault.

Stop doing his dishes. Use paper plates. Wash baby bottles because they need it, but don't do his dishes.

You get what you pay for. You also teach people how to treat you by accepting or not accepting certain behaviors. Get it?

My man does most of the dishes most of the time. He also does at least half of the cooking.

Answer 11

Listen, his "job" at home may be important BUT to put it plain-do you wash his d--- too? He is not like all men but unfortunately you keep covering for him. You seem to have your priorities in line so get his on the same sheet of music as yours. Is he home due to child care expenses or cuz' he is too lazy to keep a job Sweetheart? I do 98% of the house chores here AND hold down a full time job. You wanna know why? Cuz' I love my other 1/2 and I know it makes her life a little easier...It's all about what you can give, not expect or want. Have him read this one cuz' it may hit home. Good luck! If nothing else works, since you go to bed "later" pile them on his side of the bed until he gets with it!