your sexual relationship is a direct reflection on your overall relationship. That said, what you are experiencing is normal. And no it does not get better on it's own.
The excitement you felt at the beginning was because it was new. For both of you. We humans are designed to get bored when we know too much about someone....like marriage.
The only way to keep it good is if you both work at it. Once that attraction thing is gone then there goes the sex. And when you have that first baby......well things get real bad then. Now your wife has another priority and she always will follow that.
The one thing men do not do that would help the most, and I am an authority on this, is pay attention you your wife, surprise her, make your life an adventure. I lost one wife because I didn't do this. Problem is it is so hard to change yourself with all the other things that go on in life.
Communication is critical. You must talk about this and everything else or pretty soon you will not be talking much at all.
2006-09-29 03:55:37
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answer #1
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answered by John B 5
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Welcome to hell!
Sex doesn't get better only less frequent (Remember Gene Levy in American Pie) "The longer you're married the longer you can go without... sex.
If you ask why she'll say that you are not romantic anymore so you will be and nothing will change.
She'll say that you don't do anything around the house so you will and nothing will change.
She come up with every damn excuse you can think of. You might even try to introduce something new into the bedroom. But she'll shy away from it.
What you have to do is find out what the heck is going on inside her head (if that's even possible).
Finally learn from this and if you ever get the chance don't say I do again. Women improve until then. The day you get married, that's as good as your gonna get. Afterward she's in charge.
2006-09-29 03:50:21
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answer #2
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answered by curtaincaller 2
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Each year seems to bring changes and surprizes. Don't assign blame, you are a couple for a reason - and you should deal with everything together. One thing you need to realize is that a woman's "peak time" is 35 to 40. A man's is 18. Do you see the disparity? A man's testosterone starts sliding, just as the woman's urges are building up. There are tons of things that can be done - the utmost of all is to stay close and intimate as a couple, and the rest comes from that. If you are worried about something particular, see a doctor and get a referral to a urologist for testing. Wish ya luck!
2006-09-29 04:51:31
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answer #3
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answered by Lydia 7
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I'm not convinced that human beings were meant to be monogamous. At least it's safe to say that after a few years, sometimes even a few months, it's almost inevitable that you get bored with your partner. You can "switch it up," and in the interest of maintaining a stable relationship, you'll probably want to try, but it's hard to deny the purely sexual urge to go outside the relationship for new adventure. Obviously men understand this more than women, generally speaking. I'm sure it all goes back to caveman days.
I know a lot of people won't like what I've said, but I'm just being honest. BTW I've been in a relationship for almost 3 years now. But I'm aware of the real challenges - I just feel that it's worth it to have somebody there for you, and also a lot safer than risking disease etc.
2006-09-29 04:18:01
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answer #4
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answered by jonjon418 6
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imagine about what you used to do once you first were given at the same time. Make a even as each and every week to spend at the same time without the youngsters, both get a babysitter, leave them with a pal or maybe do some thing on your lunch destroy. bypass on dates, for a magnificent meal, to the cinema, do daft such issues as ice skating or bowling. Make little gestures on your each day existence, like once you bypass paying for convey him again a touch present day, or maybe wonder him at paintings with a picnic lunch in some unspecified time sooner or later, provide one yet another massages, bypass for walks, in simple terms spend high quality time with one yet another. With Valentine's Day arising, imagine about a particular present day that takes you again to the starting up of your relationship once you probably did no longer produce different household projects to purpose to re-light that romance, or maybe bypass for a weekend away. Be spontaneous, even with the indisputable fact that small a gesture you could in good structure into your day can help. Why no longer take in dancing training at the same time, fairly some bars do once a month salsa nights that may in good structure round your way of existence extra perfect than weekly practise.
2016-12-04 00:51:48
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answer #5
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answered by crompton 4
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It's both of you, like any aspect of marriage, be it bills, saving for a house, anything...you have to work at it.
You want to spice of your sex life, take a weekend and go someplace quiet, no phone, no TV, and rediscover each other as people, as individuals, and as a couple.
Send her flowers, leave a note or card in the medicine cabinet for her to find. Its the little things that you do to keep the flames burning.
2006-09-29 03:46:49
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answer #6
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answered by OleMarbleEyes 5
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It could be you, but why don't you try to spice it up a bit. When you come home, just throw her on the couch and make love ot her, make it interesting.... It's easy to get into that rut where you know you love your significant other, but the passion isnt as intense as it used to be, so you've got to get yourself back to when you couldnt get enough of her, and you didnt KNOW if you'd have her forever so you wanted to enjoy every minute of her...
2006-09-29 03:51:24
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answer #7
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answered by slickpam 2
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Try getting a few books on how to spice up a marriage. I have been with my hubby for 10 yrs and it worked for us
2006-09-29 03:45:12
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answer #8
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answered by heartache 4
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Try variety....try new places. Stop doing the same old ruitine and make it exciting again! Trust me, if you set something up that's really romantic in a place your wife my never think of, she'll love it! It'll show that you care about your relationship enough to think of all of it.
2006-09-29 03:45:01
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answer #9
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answered by youdontneedtoknowme 5
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I've been married 15 years and sex has never been better hot steamy sex
2006-09-29 03:45:44
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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