What do men expect from their wives ?

Question

In general, most men get bored by the existence of their wives, once behind whom he used to fall head on hills. Then something might be wrong from the woman's part, what is it ?

Answer 1

MY DEAR JANAKI J. ,
ONE IMPORTANT AND SIMPLE THING I MUST TELL YOU IS THAT ALL MEN ARE DIFFERENT. EACH PERSON HAS A DIFFERENT POINT OF VIEW FOR THE SAME THING.
I KNOW THAT THIS IS A LONG ANSWER BUT DO READ IT AND SEE IF IT CAN HELP YOU.
THERE ARE MEN WHO CONSIDER WOMEN ONLY AS A MEANS OF SEXUAL SATISFACTION. THEN THERE ARE MEN WHO MARRY ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE LOOKING FOR A SOURCE OF MONEY [ THIS IS ATLEAST PREVALENT IN INDIA ] .
BUT THERE IS GOOD NEWS FOR YOU. THE ABOVE MENTIONED PEOPLE BELONG TO A MINORITY. THE MAJORITY OF THE MEN ARE NOT LIKE THAT.
THOUGH I WON'T BE ABLE TO SAY THAT WHAT I FEEL WOULD BE THE SAME FOR A MAJORITY OF THE MEN, BUT THIS IS WHAT I EXPECT FROM MY WIFE.
I THINK THAT MARRIAGE IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT EVENTS IN A PERSON'S LIFE. WHETHER IT IS A MAN OR A WOMAN. THIS IS THE COMING TOGETHER OF TWO DIFFERENT INDIVIDUALS AND THE UNION OF TWO SOULS. I FEEL THAT IT IS ESPECIALLY SPECIAL FOR A WOMAN SINCE SHE LEAVES HER PARENTS' HOME [ I AM TALKING ABOUT THE GENERAL INDIAN SCENARIO ] AND MOVES INTO A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT HOME WITH NEW INDIVIDUALS AND A NEW ENVIRONMENT.
SHE IS THE ONE WHO HAS TO MAKE THE MOST COMPROMISES AND SACRIFICES. I SALUTE THE INDIAN WOMEN.
I THINK THAT IT IS THE DUTY OF BOTH THE INDIVIDUALS TO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER. A LITTLE BIT OF UNDERSTANDING GOES A LONG WAY IN BUILDING A LONG - LASTING RELATIONSHIP.
WE ALL HAVE EXPECTATIONS FROM EACH OTHER AND WHAT HAPPENS IS THAT WE DO NOT TRY TO UNDERSTAND THE OTHER PERSON'S POINT OF VIEW. WE TEND TO BE SELFISH.
I PERSONALLY, EXPECT MY WIFE TO BE BEAUTIFUL [ THOUGH PEOPLE MIGHT GO ON SAYING THAT LOOKS DO NOT MATTER, BUT YES A BEAUTIFUL FACE CAN EVEN GET AWAY WITH MURDER! ] . I WOULD LIKE MY WIFE TO BE INTELLIGENT [ I AM NOT SAYING THAT I WANT A WOMAN WHO HAS A Ph.D. DEGREE IN PHYSICS, BUT AN INTELLIGENT WOMAN IS ALWAYS A TURN-ON ] . SHE SHOULD BE INDEPENDENT, CHARMING, COURAGEOUS TO QUESTION MY DECISIONS AND FUN-LOVING. HERE I MUST ALSO TELL YOU THAT FAITH IN EACH OTHER ALSO PLAYS A VERY IMPORTANT ROLE. AND ONE SHOULD BE STRONG ENOUGH TO REMAIN FAITHFUL TO HIS/ HER PARTNER.
I WOULD ALSO LIKE HER TO BE PRACTICAL . I REALLY LOVE A WOMAN IF SHE CAN UNDERSTAND THE GRAVITY OF THE CIRCUMSTANCES AND TAKE WISE DECISIONS AND IS READY TO COMPROMISE. THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT SHE SHOULD LET ANYONE USE HER AND TAKE UNNECESSARY ADVANTAGE OF HER.SHE SHOULD HAVE THE WILL POWR TO FIGHT AGAINST ALL ODDS .
YOU MIGHT BE THINKING THAT WHATEVER I AM WRITING IS ALL BULLSHIT [ SORRY FOR USING THIS WORD ] AND THIS CAN ALL HAPPEN IN MOVIES AND STORIES. BUT. NO, MY DEAR, THIS IS POSSIBLE IN REAL LIFE TOO. I HAVE SEEN A WOMAN WITH THESE QUALITIES IN MY MOTHER AND I REALLY WISH MY WIFE WOULD HAVE ALL HER QUALITIES.
NOW, ANSWERING THE OTHER PART OF YOUR QUESTION .
WHAT GENERALLY HAPPENS IS THAT AFTER THE MARRIAGE, BOTH THE INDIVIDUALS ARE IN A DREAM LIKE STATE. THEY YEND TO SEE EVERYTHING WITH ROSE-TINTED GLASSES. AFTER THE INITIAL PERIOD, THE ATTRACTION STARTS TO WEAR OFF. MEN ARE BY NATURE PERVERT AND LIKE CHANGE. THEY TEND TO FEEL THAT AFTER WORK, I WILL AGAIN HAVE TO GO TO THE SAME HOUSE AND THE SAME WOMAN BEFORE ME, NAGGING ME. AND THEY REALLY DON'T LIKE THIS . THEY START FEELING TRAPPED. YOU MUST NOTE THAT THIS HAPPENS IN A RELATIONSHIP WHERE THEY ARE NOT FULFILLING THEIR DUTIES AND ARE BEING SELFISH.
EARLIER , WHEN THE WIFE WAS HIS GIRLFRIEND, THERE WAS AN ELEMENT OF MYSTERY IN HER. HE HAD NOT FULLY EXPLORED HER[ PUN FULLY INTENDED]. BUT NOW HE KNOWS EVERYTHING ABOUT HER. SHE BECOMES A ROUTINE OBLIGATION.
WHAT IS REQUIRED IS EFFORT FROM BOTH SIDES. WOMEN MUST UNDERSTAND THAT MEN LOVE CHANGE.SO MY IDEAL WIFE WOULD GIVE ME LITTLE SIURPRISES AND SPICE UP OUR SEX LIFE.FOR EXAMPLE, CALLING ME UP IN THE OFFICE AND SAYING RAUNCHY THINGS. I WOULD LOVE THAT.WEARING SUGGESTING CLOTHES WHEN WE ARE ALONE.
I MIGHT BE SOUNDING LIKE A SEX STARVED MAN. BUT ,THIS IS THE TRUTH THAT MEN LOVE SEX.
AND THINKING THAT THERE IS PROBLEM ON THE WOMAN'S PART ONLY IS COMPLETELY WRONG. IT IS THE DUTY AND THE RESPONSIBILITY OF BOTH THE INDIVIDUALS TO CONTRIBUTE.
GENERALLY,MEN HAVE A LARGE EGO AND TEND TO ONLY LOOK FOR THE SATISFACTION OF THERE NEEDS. BUT THIS IS WRONG. THE WOMAN SHOULD HAVE EQUAL PARTICIPATION IN ALL THE MATTERS RELATING TO THEM.
AT LAST, I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THAT A LOVING, CARING , UNDERSTANDING NATURE. RESPECT FOR HIS BELIEFS & HIS FAMILY [ IF YOU DON'T AGREE WITH HIM ON SOME MATTER , TRY TO TELL HER CALMLY ], FAITH AND LOTS OF SEX!!! CAN REALLY MAKE YOU THE APPLE OF HIS EYES.

Answer 2

The simple truth of the matter is; you meet someone that you are physically attracted to and come together. Whatever happens after that is based on both of your expectations and whatever commonalities exist between you. One important ingredient is to maintain your own identity (i.e. interests, goals, values). Of course it is important to share these areas, but if each of your focus is only each other than you'll have nothing else to offer the other. A woman sometimes clings too tightly, once she has found "her man", expecting him to be responsible for every part of her life including her very happiness (this could be a fault of mother nature, since the beginning of time the man provides and the woman takes care of the young). On the other hand men can treat a woman as a possession, restricting her from growing as an individual. The key is for both parties to maintain a life independent of their partner to feel fulfilled and not become bored or distant that may lead to cheating, separation or divorce.

Answer 3

Jan a good man be he a boy friend or husband should be expecting the same thing he is putting into this relationship communication affection and understanding A marriage will only last if the two that have entered into it are prepared to compromise not surrender but meet each other half way after all that is why they are called our partners in matrimony.
Yes after a time you get to become comfortable in you love for one another but that is not bored its just a different phase of love you can light a fire and make your relationship more passionate if that's what he is after . If your marriage isn't what you want it to be change it but dont take all the blame it takes two to make a marriage and two to fix it if its not working right .,

Answer 4

You shouldn't expect anything in a relationship other than that they love you, are honest and stay faithful. If you fit together, do things together you won't get bored. Men who get bored with wives for having let herself go never really loved her in the first place, or loved her for all the wrong reasons.

Answer 5

You miss a point here: sex isn't enough. i mean, if you are going to lie there while I pound away, I might as well have sex with a bagel. I want you to be a full participant in our life together, not just in the bed, but in all things that we do. Many men view a wife as a person you can have sex with at any time, but you miss out on a lot with a callow attitude like that. I want my wife to be her own person. She's not just my wife; she's not just her father's daughter; she's not just mommy to the kids. She is her own person who compliments me. Anything less demeans her and diminishes me.

Answer 6

Nagging wife is a curse. A man is looking for a wife who is helpful, kind, considerate. He may have had a bad day. He wants to forget and be happy while at home. If he has to face bitter battles at home too,he curses the day he got in to all this. Let me hasten to add that it devolves on the husband too to be all this and more especially if the wife is working.

Answer 7

Probably not the woman's fault but the fact that men need variety. So you need to keep him interested by doing things to surprise him every once in a while.

Answer 8

Hi Janaki J,

Guys want their wives to shut up for half a minute, give them wet sloppy BJs and have sex with them at least three times a week. Is that too much to ask?

--Rick

Answer 9

Sometimes guys need "my time" the need for it grows the longer you are married. Evaluate what things you talk to him about. Don't complain the second he walks in the door or tell him a long story that he really doesn't want to hear. Those are some things in my life that make me take more time for myself.

Answer 10

I don't think it is all your fault. It takes two to dance and it takes two to make a marriage work. It's good that you are willing to shoulder some of the responsibility and do what is necessary to make things to work but he needs to do the same.

Good luck.