My daughters father goes overboard to me when he gets angry at our 8yr old daughter! She is not a bad kid, she just likes a "yes" when she ask to go over a friends house or something like that. Her father has let her do to much over the last couple of years, and when we are not getting along, he lets her do things, buy sher stuff, takes her off my punishments, and not discipline her to spite me - as if that was going to make her like and love him more and pull her away from me! I'm Mom - need I say more - a dumb attempt! And I've been telling him for a couple of years now that he is spoilling her and he will be regretting it in the future! I also told him to stop calling her a baby, last yr mostly, because she is not-for instance-she can clean her room, put candy wrappers in the trash, etc. Now she cries to "No's" when she can't have her way and he starts yelling and cussing! Like, go the "F" in your rm, shut the "F" up, etc. He said he grew up with that-I say it's too harsh!!!!!!
2006-09-29 00:39:29 · 21 answers · asked by HotSista 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
No...its equivalent to verbal abuse
2006-09-29 00:44:31 · answer #1 · answered by Robin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Slapping the face sometimes will jar the kid back to reality. It's an effective tool, though, so I only used it once or twice per kid. Our rule was that, when the kids say a word they shouldn't, they had to hold a mouthful of listerine for xx number of seconds. She can't talk back unless you've allowed her to enter into an argument with you. It should be clear cut. I am the boss, you're the kid. I'm the one who gets to choose how we do this thing. I don't need any help from you. Do you have time out? We had a rug in the hallway where time outs were waited out--in a place deserted of entertainment, traffic, etc. TX Mom
2016-03-26 22:28:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, i'll say cursing at her is a little harsh. But on the other hand, instead of cursing at her i think her should spank her. She's old enough to understand what "no" means. And even though you two may conflict sometime when it comes to discipline, she should know the parents are in control, not her. So if she wants to cry over a "no", give her something to cry about. That way the next time you say no, she won't try to change it with tears or a temper tantrum. OR you can punish her. Which ever works for you.
2006-09-29 00:46:19 · answer #3 · answered by jaye 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This hits me to the very core!!! This man obviously doesn't know how to communicate or to be a proper parent. Too harsh??? It's totally inappropriate. She's still a child..a spoiled child, yes, but still a child. Of course she's going to cry when told "no", when she gets what she wants when she cries. Children are wiser than you think. You people need to set some ground rules, and one of them is for your husband to grow up. and you need to get some backbone! He's not talking to an adult when he cusses at her. He makes me SICK!!!! I would NOT put up with such behavior. Wait until other parents complain to you when their children go home and tell them what your daughter says to them, and she will repeat his profanity when provoked. Why wouldn't she? Your husband is teaching her that that language is okay! I don't care what he grew up with. Obviously his homelife wasn't that great either. That doesn't mean he can transmit that behavior to his own child. If he were mature at all, he would want better for his child! PERIOD!
2006-09-29 01:17:51 · answer #4 · answered by Blondie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Parents should never cuss at their children or even at each other (especially in front of children).
Also parents should be consistent with discipline, and not undue the others. If one parent thinks the discipline is inappropriate, then the parents need to discuss it in private. And if decided it needs to be changed, then both parents need to say that THEY decided to change it. Maybe go to a reward system... keep the room clean, and then more candy is available (at appropriate time, and amount).
Children tend to turn out like the parents. Did the father grow up that way?
2006-09-29 00:48:50 · answer #5 · answered by RB 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course he should not! He has made her into a "yes" person and he needs to undo it. The two of you definetley have to stay on the same page or this kid is gonna be totally messed up. I have had to talk to my step-son many times about how "no means no" due to his mother is a yes person and always has been.
2006-09-29 00:46:59 · answer #6 · answered by Val 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah that is a little harsh, but at least you will not have to worry about her wanting to stay with him.But at least you can count your lucky stars that its just cussing and not hitting.I think I would rather be dealing with a father who is not talking appropriately as opposed to him molesting or beating her.
2006-09-29 00:52:00 · answer #7 · answered by Nikie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your right. He shoudnlt be talking to your daughter that way. But I dont' have any advice that would help you out really. Bc that's ur husband r at least ur daughters father. And it sounds like he's just working against you. He's not supporting you in ur decsions.
2006-09-29 00:45:34 · answer #8 · answered by Kimberly C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You daughters father is committing child abuse (verbal abuse) Call DCFS or CPS.....his visitations will be supervised. WARN him that if the verbals don't cease you will make that call. The child will mimick what daddy does....Can you imagine a NO from you and the childs' mimick response to y ou? Do something today....Stop the verbal abuse from happening!!!
2006-09-29 00:44:32 · answer #9 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's abusive behavior.
He created the situation by spoiling her and now he has to deal with it like a father should, not some screaming maniac!
2006-09-29 00:42:39 · answer #10 · answered by Angela 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, he shouldn't yell and cus at her. He can be stern, sure, and stick to his guns on the rules, but there's no need to talk to her that way. He should be setting an example, and that's not a good one.
2006-09-29 00:44:05 · answer #11 · answered by Eric H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋