I set Very High Standards to my self and when i dont achieve wut i want want i really hate myself!read more?

Question

I always want to be the best in everything but I know that I cant! Still all my goals in life revolve around perfection and if I don’t do sth the way I want I don’t do it at all! and this leads me to self loathing! what should i do?

Answer 1

Realize that being a perfectionist makes you imperfect - it is a character flaw. If you stop being a perfectionist, you will be perfect.

Answer 2

There is an enormous difference between choosing to do your best and trying to be the best. Trying to be the best is always a losing situation because it is spawned by self doubt. No matter how often you succeed, the doubt is never resolved. Doing your best is engaging without self consciousness. You can learn carpentry or poetry or whatever by doing your best and figuring out how to improve next time you do it. Trying to be the best is seeking some sort of proof or approval that actually proves nothing. Except that you were insecure about yourself. Appreciating this distinction can free you of self-consciousness that society has taught you when you were too young to question it. Good luck!

Answer 3

i understand precisely what you recommend. i'm a guy and experience the same way most of the time. i think of that is purely a fashion for us to guard ourselves from getting harm. although i think of you will desire to attempt and picture of a few thing else. at some point you will meet a guy and issues will purely click. i grow to be getting hopeless such as you, and that i eventually got here across somebody 3 weeks in the past. purely carry in there and attempt and take hazards and get your neck scratched a sprint. think of how confusing it is for a guy to attitude you besides the fact that if he likes you. that is already complicated yet once you pretend you dont care considering the fact which you're frightened of having harm, you're incredibly proscribing the opportunities of having hit on. in case you could attempt and notice it as a exciting game and repeat to your self that besides the fact that the effect seems to be, you will stay. i would not be frightened approximately your standards although, that could be a solid undertaking which you have some and you will desire to shop those.

Answer 4

You need to change your approach. It is OK to fail, lose, and BE AVERAGE. This problem may lead you to insomnia,depression and drinking.
Realize your greatness lies within your heart and mind. Forget about pleasing those you care about. If the only thing that will make you happy is perfection, depression will set in over time.

Answer 5

you should relax and realise there is no such thing as perfection. u can only do what u can cuz things will get fecked up by situations that are out of ur control anyways so do what u can and be proud to say ive done my best and feck it if its not good enough for other ppl!!

Answer 6

Agreed. Start with small, manageable goals, such as learning how to spell 4th grade words.

Answer 7

no one can be perfect we all make mistakes okay

start with small goals,,,build a collage of your dreams add to the picture as you reach your goals
remember keep it simple, dream, visulize
and you will reach your dreams

Answer 8

finally some one just like me...... :)
well one good thing about this attitude is that while aiming for the highest we reach some at some great height....
then i feel happy

keep going

Answer 9

i really understand because I'm like that...
the thing you have to remember is that you are human... and though it is GREAT to have high standards!! it is but they have to be reasonable standards

Answer 10

starting loving yourself