what u think of spanking children as apunishment for there bad behaviour?

Question

it's right or wrong

Answer 1

Never, its very humiliating. Its not right to use your physical power on a child when you already simply have the metal power.
Its humiliating in all ways, for the child, but also the parent who is doing it is humiliating himself/herself as they are doing the wrong thing.
Furthermore its causing trauma, usually not physical, but certainly mental.
How can it be that someone who says they love the child, hurt it so bad, this is lifelong trauma for a child.
Most will say that they came out fine, sure they did, but how much better could they have been if they weren't spanked?
I read too much research to even go there. I wouldn't want to be the one that my kids come to me when they are older and they need psychotherapy coz I spanked them.
Not that I am a perfect parent, I am just quite aware of what I do.
Put some links down here, which can really give you good ideas on what you can do instead.
Wonderful resources.

Answer 2

I was spanked when I was a child and I'm not sure if it influenced me one way or the other. Let me explain this...
I now live in a D/D home where I do get spanked and it does not make me want to go out and kill anyone, be belligerent and it doesn't make me nervous.

Spanking on the whole is not a bad thing, it's the way that people spank that can be bad. You do not spank a child under the age of 2 as they have not yet realised that there can be *naughty* things they can do. You do not spank in anger which means that you as the parent must be calm and loving when you decide that this is the appropriate punshment. You must also ask yourself, *if i spank now, then what?* By that I mean where do you go from a spanking? You certainly cannot ground a 3 year old to his or her room, take away priviliges etc.

Spanking, unless agreed upon as a last resort, after talking, after time out (which does not work BTW, after going to bed early, after missing a favourite show and after you have cooled down. If you spank in anger then you are abusing because anyone who is mad does not know when to stop.

Also don't be afraid to cuddle after a spanking. Your child needs to know that s/he is loved as a person.

So spanking can be both.

Answer 3

Beating your child is just plain out wrong period!!! However I start by taking there favirote things away, if that dont work time out as a last result if I have to a pop on the rear end and off to early bed. They have it pretty easy, when I was alittle girl in the early 80's my dad use to spank me and my sisters with a belt so I have "belt-a-phobia" so I dont use that form of dicsipline on my kids. Sometimes you dont know the right thing to do because people wont stay out of your business, for example my son shop lifted the other day and I caught him in the store and told him when he gets home he is in big trouble (meaning he will be grounded from all privlidges) and some nosey bat said I was abusive and the cops should be called I looked at her and told her to mind her business and if she was going to call the cops I'd be more then happy to give her a reason Id of put her over my knee and whipped her @$$!!!!!

Answer 4

don't see anything wrong with an old-fashioned over-the-knee spanking over pants or underwear using the hand. It won't make as much of a mark and if anything the redness will just be temporary. It's not like you're sitting there with a hairbrush or a cane and just whacking them until their butt starts bleeding or leaves open sores. That's when abuse starts. Spank enough so that you know they're sorry or they start crying, basically, so that you know the point has gotten across. I was spanked when I was young and I think I turned out alright.

Answer 5

The effectiveness of spanking as a disciplinary parenting tool is dependent on how you use it,if you use it all the time for EVERYTHING it wont do any good,the child will become immune to it and just hate you or be afraid of you. If you reserve it for the most serious offenses and outright disobedience it can be effective. Growing up I was spanked into my teen years and I love my parents very much and have no hard feelings toward them for any of the spankings I got. Usually they were for more serious offenses and the spankings I got as a teenager were for behavior I sure as heck never repeated,my last spanking was in high school for smoking cigarettes and skipping school,I am an adult now and have a child of my own and am in college and live a very productive and happy life. It all depends on how you raise your children and how you use spanking

Answer 6

A smack doesn't really hurt anyone but anything more is just pure brutality.
I see someone condones a smack in the mouth, this sort of thing disgusts me.
I have raised a respectful good mannered child without really ever having to give that many smacks.
I think that in general if they are well enough educated from a young age smacking isn't needed.
Too many children these days are being mistreated by violent parents so before giving a smack try to think exactly why it is being given and what you will actually achieve by this!

Answer 7

I was smacked as a child and it didn't hurt me. Eversince the dogooders started telling everyone it is wrong just look how society is gone. Instead of a smack on the back of the legs we are supposed to try to reason with 2 year olds "What you did was very wrong and you must not do it again." Like a young toddler will understand? As long as you aren't belting the child I don't see a problem. I think smacking should be a last resort disipline wise, but not in anger or frustration as that borders on abuse. I also hate it when people belt kids around their head, that is totaly wrong.

Answer 8

on the butt....definite relying on what the undesirable behaviour changed into. I merely use spanking as a very last motel and then i continuously communicate over with my babies after words and tell them that i appreciate them and clarify the reason of the spanking. My childrens are reposeful, wonderful, being concerned, and do not bully or damage different childrens bodily or mentally!!! i'd in no way spank them on the leg

Answer 9

i dont think that ever spanking a child is the answer for bad behaviour i am a believer in talking through problems kids are not born bad spanking is just an extension of your own anger and are you not showing the child how to lash out at others bad behviour i have had four kids ranging from 28 to 12 and i have never had to hit them

Answer 10

I think it should be available to parents as an option. I am totally against the idea of making spanking illegal. It is a parents choice, and responsible parents do not abuse it. Making spanking illgal will not stop child abuse, which is already illegal.
I very rarely spank my child these days, but she has had some slaps on the hand in the past for behaviour that was not only naughty, but liable to cause accidents or worse pain than a smacking.