Im 18...and IM REALLLLLLLLLY SHY!!!!!!!!! when im around boys i get nervous......plz help me get over my shyness plz!!!!!! My best friends gets boyfriends really quick....i just wish i can be lyk her outgoing wat do i have to do???
2006-09-27 13:33:50 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
The thing that helped me get over some shyness when I was a kid was working as a cashier part-time in a very large, busy, supermarket. That type of situation makes it necessary to get used to being able to talk to one new person after another, and depending on the person/circumstances, it gave me a chance to sometimes talk more to one customer or another or else just get used to being friendly even if no conversation was involved.
I don't think you can change yourself into someone outgoing. You can, though, find small ways (as I mentioned above; it doesn't have to be working in a store, but a situation where you have to talk to people does help) to gradually overcome the shyness enough so that you're friendly and comfortable with people.
Another thing about activities/work that give you a chance to demonstrate to yourself how capable you are is that you gain confidence with everything you do that shows your competence. Part of overcoming shyness may have to come with a little more maturity too.
If you're around boys just try to see them as people and don't expect yourself to be the life-of-the-party. If you can overcome your shyness by taking small steps that will get you used to talking to strangers or talking in a small group of people that should make you ok enough to be the kind of person who has a group of friends and who gets asked out. There are boys who find a quiet girl nice, just as some boys like the girl who is outgoing.
One thing to remember: Consider that other people may be just like you (for the most part - I know everyone has different personalities) and treat people in the way that you wish people would treat you when you first meet them. For example, because you're shy you may wish someone would say the first thing. The other person may wish the same thing. If you use your understanding of what it feels like to be shy you will have an understanding of how many other people just may also feel (even if that isn't the occasional outgoing person). If you think about making the other person feel comfortable around you you may find that you become quite the sociable person when you're in a small group.
2006-09-27 16:21:40 · answer #1 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to realize that you are like other people. Everyone else is doing it, why can't I. Sometimes it's good to follow the crowd, especially in this case. I use to be the same way, until I realize, if I want to have as much fun, I need to step up and start talking, or doing things that I was so shy to do. And I did, it's not that hard. Once you do it, you will have so much more fun. You are missing out. Get out there and mingle!
2006-09-27 23:04:42 · answer #2 · answered by Sailor's Wife 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can sympathize in some aspects with your troubles, i guess you can try and do something out of the ordinary and see where it leads you. Maybe your shyness comes from a lack of confidence, but if you feel like you are confident in your self then try to be a little more aggressive when it comes to the opposite sex, take the initiative, change only comes when we want it too.
2006-09-27 21:43:58 · answer #3 · answered by chuko_93 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do when you are surrounded by boys is to imagine your self completely naked and on your knees giving head to all the boys. Then picture their mothers catching them with you. All you have to do is shrug and say, "Hey, I'm the victim here," and you are free to put your clothes on and trot down the lane humming your favorite song.
2006-09-27 21:04:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just take a deep breath and relax. Then learn to be confident in yourself. Self-confidence is the key here.
2006-09-27 20:42:11 · answer #5 · answered by GB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go out some more, be visible and talk to as many people as possibel, men or women..it doesnt matter, just work up that courage, before u know it u are a social butterfly like your friend.
2006-09-27 20:37:48 · answer #6 · answered by ♦cat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should accept yourself as who you are. A lot of boys like girls who are quiet and reserved, instead of yammering and showy! Good luck
2006-09-27 22:36:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start by making a point to say "hi" to someone everyday (before they say hi to you). Then move on to genuine compliments. It'll get easier before you know it.
2006-09-27 20:38:06 · answer #8 · answered by Cam 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
see a therapist, it will be worth you while, you will see a big improvement in a short times, works for me, there was a underlying reason i was so shy. good luck, god bless.
2006-09-28 00:01:23 · answer #9 · answered by sidekick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
pull my finger!
2006-09-27 22:34:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋