My husband will be 39 next week..and i don't know if he is going through a midlife crisis.., he left us (our kids and I) and is living with another woman who is 26 years old..wlll this ever end?
2006-09-27 11:19:33 · 9 answers · asked by So Fly 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
same reason women go through menopause?..not sure but for him to do that...what a jerk................
2006-09-27 11:22:56 · answer #1 · answered by Sexxssay? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This sounds little like a real midlife crisis and much more like an excuse to do what he wants. The artlcle linked to below ("Cheating Spouses: Don't Blame A Midlife Crisis" at LifeTwo) discusses research about why people cheat; none of the reasons has anything to do with age. The best thing you could do for yourself and your children is recognize that his bad behavior isn't temporary, and prepare yourself mentally to move on.
2006-09-28 00:11:57 · answer #2 · answered by lifetwo_dot_com 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry this is happening to you. Your husband is really too young to be in a "midlife crisis." More likely, he never finished growing up, and he feels like he is 26 years old himself, and he doesn't want the responsibilities of a wife and children and home to maintain. Don't let anyone blame his bad behavior on anything but his own failure.
Will it end? Uh....Don't put your life on hold waiting on him! Create a good life for yourself and your children, and then if he wants back in your life you can decide whether or not to give him that option. One thing is for sure: you need positive, cheerful, encouraging friends and family around you. Don't let people drag you down with hatred, unforgiveness, and pity. Do things that keep you and the kids moving positively, even in the smallest ways, toward a happy future: counseling, holiday plans, going to the park, education, hobbies, friends, sports, fitness, healthy food, are some examples of what I'm thinking of. Don't dwell on what that man is doing. He's not helping you! Focus on where you're getting help and support, and turn a blind eye to whatever he's doing. That's the secret to keeping on keeping on.
2006-09-27 19:00:00 · answer #3 · answered by Nanette W 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was drawn to your question and then read on to see what others had to say in response. I agree with: Cow Boy Bill. I think it is all a bunch of crap---mid life crisis !!! A psychological excuse to have no backbone and permit some think---they have permission to act like a dog in heat. Over the years I've heard so many stories of men in "mid life crisis"---they literally rewrote the story of their lives after 9, 10, 15, 20 years with their wives and children. The most absurd excuse I heard was from one man who claimed, " I never loved my wife,blah, blah, blah, now that I've met: Miss sweet younger thing, Miss Naive who is willing to believe I'm a good guy---NOW I know what love is and can live happily ever after with sweet young, naive thing...Makes me sick to think these " A" holes get away with being a swine and the new little Miss thinks she'll live happily ever after with the old dog! This guy, your husband is not who you thought he was! The guy you thought you married would never have acted like this. The good news is you have the proof there was love in your marriage ---your children. The man you married died...when you see this guy with the 26 year old remember he's not the guy you married. Be good to yourself. Take time to heal and love your children. Down the road you'll find that time will heal the pain his behavior has caused you and you will find a person looking back at you in the mirror that is more beautiful , and stronger than you ever could have imagined. Love and strength to you in this difficult transition!
2006-09-27 20:50:12 · answer #4 · answered by Brains & Beauty 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had my mid-life crisis when I turned forty. I was depressed for an entire year but I snapped out of it when I hit 41.
Thing is, I never cheated on my wife or did any of that other crazy @ssed stuff. With me, I guess that I saw my youth slipping away and was powerless to stop it.
Your husband is trying to hang on to his youth, and by being with a 26 yr old is his way of doing it. This woman makes him feel young again. Of course he's a total dumb @$$ for thinking this way. It's not fair to you or your children. When his relationship hits the skids (and it will), he'll come back with his tail between his legs and beg for forgiveness. What you do from there is your business, but remember this, you'll never be able to trust him again.
2006-09-27 20:33:33 · answer #5 · answered by Larry F 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, this will end. It's called DIVORCE! He is an ignorant @ss-hole. Mens mid-life crisis is bull$hit. There is MUCH more to your story than you are telling...not that it matters. Anyone that would wreck a marriage and hurt their children rather than suck-it up and do the right thing for a few years is garbage. My only advice at this point is to hire the nastiest lawyer HIS money can buy and do the very best you can for your children. They will be grown and gone before you know it so try and do it right.
2006-09-27 18:53:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think both women and men experience midlife crisis at some level...Some more extreme than others....It will pass...
2006-09-27 22:11:21 · answer #7 · answered by Mechelle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because the can do what they want ,,then they have a blame for it, they always need a blame for what they do
2006-09-27 18:26:09 · answer #8 · answered by sassyone 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because they can't cope with their life....
2006-09-27 18:41:44 · answer #9 · answered by Kerilyn 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋