abortion or adoption?

Question

abortion is not MURDER...its not living or walking or anything, its an 8week old egg! GOD has absolutely NOTHING to do with this. IF there is one such figment, then HE ****** up... not me! how am i selfifh for wanting to have a child and be able to care for it like i WANT to and NOT put my child through hell?! HOW is that selfish!?! dont sit here and make me feel bad about trying to live my life and handl things the right way. im a dam a dult and i kno whats best for me the child and the father. none of you know where i am right now.and as i have said before..if i HAD the child, after 9months of growing it inside MY BODY and then going through the pain of birth...how would i be able to give it up!? why would i torture my baby ?!? bring him into a world of chaos, war, and insecurity?! that would be selfish!

Answer 1

I agree with you on all but, one issue. You also forgot to add that it isn't fair to have the government try and control every woman's body. If women don't have the right to decide what to do with their own body then what value are the other rights?

Abortion is cold-blooded murder, but a necessary one sometimes. We live in a flawed world and sometimes the best decision is a flawed one. I FAVOR ABORTION.

Ideally I would like to see the woman carry the child to term and give it up for adoption, but that takes a very strong woman to do that. The child becomes a part of them, it is not just a life in their belly, it is THEM. Giving up that child will probably be the hardest thing that they have every done, very few will be capable of it.

I hate child abuse, and I think its is one of the worst crimes that a person can commit. An unwanted child will have to suffer 16-18 years of abuse and it will warp them so much as to damage their entire life and the lives of those around them.

Now imagine what happens with an unwanted pregnancy. The woman is usually young in high school (The percentage of this among black people is alarming, and not just a rumor or product of racial prejudice). The mother will have to drop out of high school; when the pregnancy starts to show. Some schools offer a special class for pregnant women, but this is pretty rare. Regardless of what happens the woman will have to drop out when the child is born, and this will change the family’s life.

By far the most unwanted pregnancies are those where the father isn’t present, and refuses to help care for the child. Suing a person for child-support is expensive and takes a long time. If the father is in school, unemployed, in prison or otherwise poor then they can’t pay child support. So the woman and her family have to take up the burden. There are a few cases where the father and the father’s family will step forward, but 95% of the time they won’t; and raising a child is expensive. The child has to eat, and they grow out of their clothes quickly. They need a roof over their head and so much more, with all of that it will be double what it takes to support just the mother.

Since the woman doesn’t have a high school degree the only jobs she can get are those that only offer a minimum wage; they can’t even join the military. The child will have to be taken care of and that will be difficult and time consuming. Someone is going to have to meet those 4:00 a.m. feedings. Sometimes the woman’s family can help and we end up with grandparents raising their own grandchildren. Regardless of who helps it will take a lot time and money. The mother can’t go back to school until the child is old enough to take a bottle, and usually the baby has to be 12-18 months old (this is an optimistic figure). If the mother is strong she can try to go back to school, but even if she has a parent or grandparent to provide childcare it is still a difficult task, and the woman can only go to school part time. Many women don’t even try to return to school, which dooms them to a life of poverty.

They are poor, the woman’s life has been totally disrupted, and the mother can’t graduate with her class or go to her graduation ball. Teenage girls look forward to this event all throughout high school. This one night is supposed to be magical for them; instead it is filled with a baby crying. Is it any wonder that the mother soon starts to resent her baby? Parents normally can’t provide childcare, because they have their own lives and their own family to care for, so it falls to the grandparents. Some can do a good job, but a lot can’t. They won’t have high paying jobs, and probably live on a fixed income. All suffer some health problems and they will only get worse; very few grandparents will live to see their grandchild graduate high school. If they had proper health care and a better more relaxing environment then they could, but the child robs them of this. They are supposed to be retired and enjoying life, now they find themselves having to raise a baby all over again. Is it any wonder that many grandparents can develop a resentment for the child that has caused all their problems, or for their granddaughter who did such a stupid thing and saddled them with such responsibility.

A very small percentage of mothers will be able to graduate high school and even start college, but only an extremely small percentage of those mothers will graduate. Most will be doomed to a life of poverty and forced to live in it.

The child is resented and raised in an environment where they are not wanted. Even if the grandparents and the mother are there the child can’t help but wonder what happened to his daddy. They will grow up poor and miss out on many advantages of life. If they are smart or need help then they won’t get the extra training they need. Under these burdens they will grow up like a tree bent by a great weight.

Since the mother is poor and won’t be working with college graduates (she may serve some of them though). The kind of friends she will have will be just as poor. Her old friends have moved on to a different world and she will have lost them. It has been said, and rightly so, that you are who your friends are. You and your friends are a reflection of your life. She isn’t going to meet a top of the line mate and she is very lonely so she will often end up with a sub par husband. This just increases the chance that the child will be abused, and this life long abuse is very damaging—this is the childhood that almost all serial murders experience.

The child will be resentful, full of hate, and angry. They will not do well in school and will probably drop out early. A few might make it through high school, but most won’t. With nowhere else to turn they join gangs and become criminals. If they were abused even a little then they to will be abusers. This only increases their chance to commit violent crimes. People like this end up in only two places, either a grave or prison. Prison just breeds more crime. If the person hasn’t suffered some sort of abuse before, they will now. Even the regulated life of a prison is hard, the cells are small, and you will never be alone. Then there are the criminals, which have the wolf personality—pick on anyone who appears weaker.

Is it worth putting someone through all of this, is if fair? What about the cost to society? What would you be willing to do to stop the creation of a murderer or a serial killer? Some people have risen beyond all these problems, but these are the extraordinary people, and even these people will have a very tough time and will be behind the curve.

For the mother it is almost just as bad. Her life has been ruined as well as her child’s and the result of this on her will be like a tree growing up under a huge weight. The Cinderella story were such a woman is picked up by a rich handsome man is very, very rare; mainly because all these Cinderellas will almost never see their Prince Charming.

I think that in a case like this abortion is the better solution. I don’t like it, and I don’t shrink from the word murder, but sometimes murder is the only option. It is a cruel world we live in.

Anti-abortionists say killing is a crime, but sometimes it is the only resort, that’s why we have the death penalty. John Wayne Gacy will never kill anyone again, but if he were ever released, or escaped, it would only be a matter of time before he became a serial murderer again. Anti-abortionists say that if you kill one child then you could lose an Einstein. For every possible Einstein though 3 –4 possible serial killers will also be born, a few dozen murders, and a few hundred other criminals. The only Einsteins that can come out of that upraising are the ones that are able to forge a decent life for themselves. They could have done so much better if they were just given a decent chance. You won’t get a truly Einstein caliber person out of an unwanted birth except once in a million years, because any possible Einstein are just those that are able to make a successful life for themselves.

Abortion is murder, and I would like to see anything done to prevent it, EXCEPT forcing an unwanted child into the world. The penalty for doing that out weighs the crime of murder. I support abortion and all that brings from condoms to the morning after pill, even late term abortions. The consequences of not supporting them are just too great.

Answer 2

You know the old saying you lay you pay. Well a baby is not a bad thing and if you don't want that baby than the best thing for you to do is give the baby up for adoption. You people say God has nothing to do with it but He does in my mind because Babies are gifts from God and you should never take that for granted. That is why people should not have sex until they are married so that way this would never be a discussion. As for us being in war! We have had how many wars and people still have sex and still popped out babies even in worse times then these. This decision is up to you but there are alot of people that can't babies and would love to have children! Just think about this living thing inside of you. If it has a heart beat it is a living being

Answer 3

Sounds to me, by the way your lashing out to your readers, that you are pretty distraught about your predicament. You say that none of us know where you are right now but you are not the only one who has had to go through this situation. I was very young with my first pregnancy and had to face the abortion/adoption/have the baby dilemma. It is a hugely stressing issue to deal with because there are so many choices that are involved. I am not sure if you really want an answer but maybe a set of opinions on your situation. I personally suggest sitting down with the father, your family and friends to discuss this issue and get their moral support to help you make the choice that you want to make. If you are not that far along you have enough time to calmly think it through. I am not sure if you want your parents to know, but it may be very helpful in your decision by talking to them. My son is now 14 years old and one of the best things that I could have brought into this world....we think this world is not something to bring a child into...but with work we can raise these children to make this world better. I am not for abortion, but I am wise enough to know that other people have different beliefs, and I am not going to force mine on you....I hope you work this through....one way or the other.

Answer 4

Hey, deep breath! Ok, take a moment to calm down and figure this out.
You have choices.
For awhile anyway.
If you are not ready for a baby and think you could carry a fetus to term and then give it up for adoption, you could probably find a great family to take care of your baby.
If you do not want to be pregnant, then maybe an abortion is right for you.
It isnt an easy choice, but it sounds like you have worked it out in your head.
the sooner the better though.
and you should check with planned parenthood and see their counselor and be clear on the procedure and everything.
and after that, make sure you have a long term plan for preventing more unwanted pregnancies.

But if you want a baby and will love it and take care of it, then you should have it.
the rest will work itself out.
Good luck

Answer 5

Look the gift of bearing a child was given to you by noone except for "God". Abusing the gift of bearing a child is not acceptable. You made a mistake once, do not ever do this again. Have you ever thought what that child may have looked like if you would have carried it full term. There are good families out there who would have given that child a great home and would have loved it as if it were theres. If you feel like you cannot take care of a child. please put it up for adoption. Give life a chance. You were given a great gift to bear children, do not abuse your body and throw away this great gift. It sounds like you have been through a lot of frustration and disappointment in life. Yes this is a bad world we live in, but getting rid of a precious gift is not the way to deal with it.

Answer 6

those who believe in abortion, were born themselves. don't give it up, I'm sure there are those around you that would help, support, and nurture this child. Your right, the 8 week old egg doesn't know any different, but you do. And a year from now you might regret aborting that baby, and you will have to live with that for the rest of your life.

Answer 7

I agree with you. However, I do not agree with abortion as a means of birth control. So many men and women have abortion after abortion after abortion. That's messed up dude. I believe your reasons are legit. And I would prefer to see a women walk out of an abortion clinic then walk out of a alley leaving her baby dead in a dumpster. But people must be responsible, there are hundreds of contraceptives that can be used to prevent these types of circumstances. And this day in age NO ONE needs to engage in unprotected sex; not even married couples! How many times do you hear husband gives wife HIV??? You make your decisions, you live with your choices, don't worry about everyone else.

Answer 8

Hey I just answered your other Question, im not against you I dont want you to feel bad!! Not at all!! Relax, talk to your friends. This is you not other people, I think people just want to make sure you know what your doing. Im sure you do, they just wasted there little finger energy. Everything will be okay dont get stressed delete what they said and get off the computer, unless your doing research. My thoughts are that I am not totally for or against abortion, But I AM AGAINSt people stressing out other people who are about to go through with a HUGE desison in their life. So dont worry and live your life to the fullest.

Answer 9

Adoption

http://www.silentscream.org/

Answer 10

There are over 5000 people who would adopt your baby if you didn:t want it. They would pay for your medical treetment, the hospital stay, and for delevering of the baby. Some people cant have children and they would love to give any child a loveing home.But as far is abortion aint murder, your wrong., And GOD does have something to do with everything. You had a choice, Not to have sex, Now do the wright thing, Get wright with GOD and ask for his guidence, He will get you through.