My son has joined a theatre group to act and to write reviews of high school plays. This group requires that he provide them with his own email address. We, the parents, have a rule that only emails from people we know can come to his email inbox, so we put each email as we know it on his approved list. The critics group says they cannot provide a list of all the possible emails they'll write from and our son's email account should be unrestricted.
While this critics circle is a great opportunity, with winning reviews published in a national paper, I am puzzled by their insistence that our son's email account allow unrestricted acess from any emails so that they can write him whenever they wish. The spam we've gotten on our own email accounts is shocking - the pictures are highly explicit and the language about incest and underage stuff is just gross.
I think as a parent I must stand my ground, but it looks like he won't get to participate if I do. Any suggestions?
2006-09-27 04:46:40 · 19 answers · asked by cassandra 6 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
To clarify - my son does follow our rules - he's not even involved in this matter. At this point, it's all a discussion between me and the critics' group.
2006-09-27 04:52:58 · update #1
Right now, I don't have the password to his account and I'm happy not to. But because he can use his email freely, we've required that only pre-registered emails can get through.
2006-09-27 04:57:35 · update #2
I did offer my email address, and to forward emails, and the group said NO WAY! It must be his unrestricted email address or nothing, the group says.
2006-09-27 05:00:20 · update #3
The Group Has Now Provided Us With A List of Emails They Will Use To Contact Son. Thanks, all!
2006-09-27 08:03:50 · update #4
Don't take it as offence but...You are stupid!Your son is 13,not 3!When I was 8,my parents didn't even know who phoned for me and never looked at the letters which were for me.I had my own email address at the age of 10 and my own password and NOONE was able to look at my email without my permission.Your's a stupid rule for 5 years old kids.Doesn't your son have any confidence?I would worry about a teenager who lets his parents look at his email and follows such stupid rules.You better pay attention to your son - is he confident?Does he have any dignity?Think about it!
2006-09-27 04:55:05 · answer #1 · answered by julie 3 · 0⤊ 5⤋
That is an unreasonable request on their part. I would talk to the highest up person that you can get to.
Set up an email address for him- with the group as the only people that has that address. Keep the password for yourself, check it before he goes in there. Don't tell the theatre group what you're doing, it's none of their business.
Edited to add I think you should definitely let him participate, if for nothing else then to see what they are actually sending out, so you can be a force to stop them if you think it preys upon children.
2006-09-27 06:09:20 · answer #2 · answered by Simply_Renee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would NOT allowed unrestricted email access for a number of reasons, the most obvious being the ones you have stated. After working in the theatre in some 30 productions I can tell you that the theatre community has a number of radical leaning homosexuals, predators, and drug using members.(I will hear about this no doubt). The theatre also has some of the most intelligent, creative individuals in the world. Now your son may be willing and able to handle these situations but I would set up a program that forwards every email to my account as well or require him to allow you full access to his email accounts. He should not be allowed to delete any email until you have seen it and gone over it with him. It's ashame they put this restriction on him but I understand that the group does not want creative restrictions put on it (regardless of who sends the email and what their agenda is). They strongly believe (as do I) in freedom of speech and expression (although it should be tempered for teens).
2006-09-27 05:36:09 · answer #3 · answered by snddupree 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would not take any chances when it comes to the computer. I would screen everything that you were not familiar with. It sounds to me that the critics circle isn't able to provide you with much of anything. They sound suspicious to me. You have seen certain things the computer has to offer. It's so sad. Being that kids are so trusting, I would stand my ground too. Maybe you could check other theatre groups and see what they offer. I'm sure, if you explain everything to your son, he would understand that you are doing it out of love and protection. I also think that what you are doing as parents and allowing only e-mails from people you know about is a very good rule. Good Luck!!!!!!!
2006-09-27 09:36:56 · answer #4 · answered by Chihuahua Lover 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just give the group your email address. How will they know if the address your son provides is yours or his own. Then you can see the emails first and only forward the ones that you approve to your son.
It sounds like the group is not trustworthy. That sounds rediculous. In our home we have a family email and our 13 yr old daughter has her own email that she just gives to her friends, but anything else goes to the main email address. If the group cannot accept that, then I wouldn't be part of that group.
2006-09-27 04:57:48 · answer #5 · answered by kat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Start a web based Yahoo account. Preview it if you want.
And it's called Freedom of the Press, it's a right of the Constitution. No newspaper or TV station can restrict e-mails or letters coming in. To do so, indicates you are not free.
However, Dear Abby, who gets unrestricted e-mails, has PEOPLE who pre-screen them and only give her the best and keep all the weirdo ones out.
So, you take charge, do the Yahoo Mail and maybe forward them to his own account or let him read the ones you selected.
You don't have to tell anyone you're doing this.
It's your right and your business.
2006-09-27 05:04:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Stay on yahoo answers and look at some of the questions kids here are asking and the answers they are getting. You should be able to answer that for your self.
No he should be allowed unrestricted access to the Internet when he turns 18.
I am just amazed parents are allowing their kids to come here unsupervised. No different with email. He is going to get spam and eventually dirty spam. And any normal young boy is going to look.
2006-09-27 04:53:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Another choice might be to keep his current email for his personal email and open a second account for the email from the critics group. That way you can keep current restrictions on his personal email and be able to monitor all incoming emails for the critics group.
2006-09-27 05:08:43 · answer #8 · answered by Samantha J 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The group sounds unreasonable for this reason I would be cautious of them and would not let him join if you can not come to a happy solution you feel comfrontable with. Any group that has children in it should be aware of the reasons you are stating
2006-09-27 05:28:16 · answer #9 · answered by ellc123 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
no! they should not because there is to much out in this old world thst could hurt him you could try setting him up an account that he can only use with in the room you can have a password on it that only you know but of course this means you would have to do this with him
2006-09-27 04:53:14 · answer #10 · answered by sunshine 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋