What do you think of my newest poem?

Question

See these eyes
That watch the land
That comb the grass
And Make the sand
That light the sky
And make the breeze
That built the mountains
And filled the seas
See these hands
That shaped the from
Of man and woman
And the unborn
Who grew the trees
And gave birds song
Who built the waters
Of rivers long
See this heart
Who sets the beat
Of mother nature's
Marvelous feat
That heals the hurt
And rights the wrong
Who pumps her blood
Forever long.

Corinne Sykes 9/27/06

It's supposed to be " That shaped the form" sorry guys.

Answer 1

It rocks.

Answer 2

That's a nice poem, but honey, you shouldn't post your name on the forum like that! You never know what wacko might be reading it. Also, I think you have a typo in the line, "That shaped the from," but otherwise, I really enjoyed your poem. Keep up the good work and keep writing!

Answer 3

The melody to the song Aaron Neville and Linda Rondstadt sang...Dont know much....that came to mind immediately while reading your poem...so I tried putting the tune to it...it fits with only a few small changes to wording....try it !!....
Because what you have actually written there, is and ode in lyric form....(will make a good song, now write the chorus)....good luck...and yes, never, ever put your real name over the internet..ok...Love your work, keep it up........

Answer 4

sounded like this is the house that jack built

Answer 5

i like it alot! u should make some kind of picture slideshow to go along with it.

Answer 6

kinda long winded in my opinion, too much talk about scenary, what would Eddie Vedder do?

Answer 7

Good...Better than anything I every came up with...Thanks

Answer 8

Give it a name.

Answer 9

i love it realy it's great,can you email a few i love poems but suck at writing them.

Answer 10

Very very nice!