my bf and i been togthr since 5yrs.things worsen when i started not to trust out of possesiveness.I hurt him much and since a month he cut off ties with me coz i was incessantly pressurizing him. i then paused for 8days and talked to him he said he's fed up with my attitudes n doesnt seem i'll change!i asked him to text me he say if god's wish he'll do it but the more i'll force him the more distant he'll be.he told me i have to make him love me again,how do i do that?He said he has no one in his life but it seems to me to forget the pressure from me he's texting other girls (he didnt told im only suspecting) wat do i do now?want him back,how do i act?i text or wait for him,do i have any chance?im totally confused??
2006-09-26 19:56:30 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If I am understanding the question right... I would say that you need to stop obsessing. He tells you youre not going to change and by dwelling on him so heavily you are proving him right. It hurts to love someone and lose them, but it hurts them more to be "trapped".
Have you ever heard the saying "If you love something, set it free - if it comes back to you it was meant to be" ?
Try being JUST his friend, he cant see that you are sincere about changing that behaviour if he never sees you but at the same time if you are all over him telling him how much you changed you will only be proving that you havent. Friends is the first step.
2006-09-26 20:03:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let it go for a while. You haven't changed since you're still pressuring him and suspecting him of texting other girls in your absence (he may be but maybe not) so you haven't even learned a lesson yet! This is exactly the type of behavior that made him cut ties with you in the first place. You want him back? If it's not too late already, learn to control your suffocating behavior. If you don't, you'll drive the next bf away as well.
2006-09-27 03:08:57 · answer #2 · answered by Avid 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Then let him be. Forcing him to talk to u is not going to work. Has he given u any reason to distrust him? U said he's txting other girls but u have no proof of it...so your accusations are really baseless then? I suggest u give each other time apart and use that time to work on your trust issues before trying to get back together. He has to see that u are willing to change. If u cannot trust him, there's no reason for u to be in this relationship.
2006-09-27 03:12:02 · answer #3 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What u need to do is show him u have changed, and you have to change. dont presurize him,just take it real easy and act nice, like a friend. show him that u sincerly want him back without forsing him.
Good luck
2006-09-27 04:00:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you gotta compromise then...it is never bad to compromise in a relationship sometimes it is the best thing to do....figure things out about yourself....every person has their own languages of love...it could be love you are showing but for him it's a task you are doing...so you really have to study him now....what he really wants in your relationship...how he would want to recieve love (the same thing as how you would wanted to be loved)...ask him...reassure him that you are willing to do everything just for the relationship to work out...tell him that you would definitely compromise....tell him that splitting up is never the best solution...it could even worsen the situation....ask him out for a romantic dinner...and talk things over....and pleaaassseee avoid arguments...keep your cool!....finally pray..it really works!
2006-09-27 03:06:40 · answer #5 · answered by maic 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
talk to him if he cared before he might work something out..........call him tell him your feelings and see what happens.
2006-09-27 03:00:10 · answer #6 · answered by Kathy 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
errrrr
2006-09-27 02:59:39 · answer #7 · answered by idontknow 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋