Okay so everyone is my dept knows that our boss is very inapprioate on several levels. So today she calls me in her office because apparently some other employee thinks that I act full of myself. My boss said she knows I am not that way but since she "can't change the way they hear", I need to change what I say. I think this B.S. and I don't understand why she is even commenting on the subject, it has NOTHING to do with the quality of job I do. This is not the first time she has commented on what I believe are personal issuses. And I am not sure that anyone even said anthing, she has a habit of making things up.
What's your opinion? Should a corporate boss interfere in personal/social matters? If you have a boss like this, how do you cope?
2006-09-26 12:20:45 · 10 answers · asked by stlou_girl_2000 2 in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
thanks for the answers. few side notes:
I've worked at this place for over 5 yrs, and this has never been brought up in ANY review EVER!!
In fact in my reviews my ability with customer service and working with people is listed as excellent.
It would also appear that I have a good relationship with fellow employees as some of us are friends.
I think I will just stick to the advice to let it go in one ear and out the other.
During our talk my boss also stated maybe this is "due to my upbringing"... since I grew up in a big city and we "tend to think we are better than other people."
2006-09-26 12:57:10 · update #1
I am a boss like that, and if my employees have problems with each other then it is my job to smooth things out.
interpersonal relations are not personal social life issues.
if I have people who can't get along and do their job then one of them has to go.
2006-09-26 12:32:22 · answer #1 · answered by Hannah's Grandpa 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
As a boss, yes it is her place to comment, especially if it is impacting the work environment and your co workers. WEhether she actually heard it of=r is making it up as you say is the true question, which you probably won't know....ever. So, in the meantime, keep it quiet and hopefully it'll blow over. Remember that you never need to disclose your personal life to your boss. They have no right to know....unless like I said it intrudes and effects work. For example if she suspectgs an alcohol or drug problem, she is obligated to get you help . Good Luck and Take it all in Stride. You should be flattered that they're even talking about you.
2006-09-26 19:26:43 · answer #2 · answered by RNinblack 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Whether or not your boss has taken things out of line is one thing, but from a manager's perspective personal/social matters become everyone's business in an office when they reflect on and involve everyone there. My suggestion: Do the job you do and graciously humble yourself when rewarded for that outstanding work. I think when employees sacrifice by trying to change themselves (even when it is not them to begin with) it is corporate promotion worthy. Just a thought, prayers =)
2006-09-26 19:24:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This seems to me like a communication on all sides. From your boss's side, I think she is the opposite of inappropriate in this case, I think she is erring too far the other direction. Here is one possibility of what is really going on - she may actually agree with the person who complained, and just be saying to you I know you're not that way in order to be as supportive as possible to you, to help support the needed change in your behavior. I especially think this because of the explanatory way she requested the change, she assigned the need for it to something else. She's your boss, she could have just said, "stop saying such and such to so and so."
Also you say it has nothing to do with the job, but you don't know that. Don't forget your boss has to report to her boss, and on up. You could be pissing her boss off and so she has to try to get to the root of the situation in order to improve her own performance. if you're wondering, YES your performance is part of her performance as her boss sees it, this is the way of the corporate world. I have employees and I am responsible for getting them to do their work, if they don't do something correctly I can't blame them because they are my responsibility.
If this is not the 1st time she has commented you may have a bigger performance problem than you think. I advise you read your company policies, or better yet, if you have a formal performance review process, I advise you strongly to look at what categories your performance is based on. I gurantee you if there is such a document you will find one or more categories for getting along with colleagues. If you want to be successful in this and other corporate jobs you must find a way to get along with others.
From your side of the communicaiton angle, maybe you really aren't full of yourself and don't mean to offend anyone - if so, don't you want to work on yourself and improve and grow? As you gain more experience, if you take advantage of opportunities to learn about yourself and improve, you will naturally increase your communication skills. But if you refuse to listen to the signs life is giving you, then you will stagnate, and have trouble keeping a job too.
Best of luck.
2006-09-26 19:39:52 · answer #4 · answered by kellyault20001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
after all they are your boss. and in a corporate work environment you rather just be nice to people. if they say you have an attitude maybe you do. or maybe its just them. but if they tell you something that is for the better that the advice and hopefully it will lead you to a better company in the future. but in every aspect your boss can interfere in your personal / social matters only when at the place of business or out in company outtings. when you are out with fellow employees after hours noone should care. if you are asking for a remedy ... all i say it just suck it up. when they tell you crap just pretend youre listening... hell i do that. but if its good advice take it and learn from it. but its crap just let it in one ear and out the other.
2006-09-26 19:28:01 · answer #5 · answered by anthony y 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the deal, if you are not conducting yourself at work in a professional manner, if your co-workers are commenting on your way of speaking then you can be called on the carpet for it.
If the boss is speaking to you about your personal life, sex, marital status or anything not directly related to your position then it is inappropriate.
There are laws concerning just what you can do and just what she can say. Good luck.
2006-09-26 19:27:20 · answer #6 · answered by sideways 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it really depends on the situation. You have to allow for a variety of personalities at work, but if it is causing problems. you have to do something. If it really is a problem, I'm not sure that it is personal or social, I would say it is professional because it effects other people's ability to do their jobs. It is a very fine line.
2006-09-26 19:23:28 · answer #7 · answered by Rookie131 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your "personal, social" matters are happening in the office, and it is effecting someone's job or how they feel in the office, or if it is because of an interaction with someone in the office, then the boss must address those concerns.
2006-09-26 19:26:06 · answer #8 · answered by Mazz 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How other employees perceive you is not a personal matter. That is definitely work related.
If it's causing you to react then maybe there's an ounce of truth.
2006-09-26 19:25:36 · answer #9 · answered by Wren 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well I can't answer your question but I can ask you this....Do you know what BOSS spelled backwards is?.................Double S O B!
2006-09-26 19:22:37 · answer #10 · answered by Texan 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋