He has in the year we were seperated, changed like night and day. We were married with 3 of my children, 1 of his (off and on) for 17 years. We have been divorced 1 year , and he wants to remarry. Have I lost my mind? I am thinking about it, we both have made improvements and haven't fought once since our divorce. It's like I am falling for a new man, and see him totally diferent ,but comfortably familar.
2006-09-26 11:40:32 · 16 answers · asked by Joner 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
that is so cool, i think youre very lucky to fall in love with him again. So yes marry him what else are you gonna do? you cant stop love
2006-09-26 11:48:59 · answer #1 · answered by James 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a tough question: Has he proposed? Do you want to propose.
Personally I do not believe people can change the core of who they are; although they can, with awareness and work, change their behavior. That said, I would court for a long time before remarrying.
PS> Dont you wish Liz Taylor had a blog?
The only reason to remarry would be the legal consequences and advantages. You should really wiegh it all up - so there can be no easy answer to the question.
Marriage is not all about love. It has those legal ramifications that can make us go crazy. So for example if either of you are "high debt" folk, then you should absolutely avoid re-marriage.
Think back to your divorce or any other time when you may each have presented your worst selves to each other; then see if you really believe it to be different - we forget so easily.
On the upside a great many issues may have resolved, paving the way for an opportunity for you.
It could work, but tread cautiously.
About 75% of divorced people remarry. Maybe tere is something to be said for remarryin someone whose faults and misdeamenors are well known to you.
I found this site, may be fun to read, I did not get the chance:
http://lutheranlucy.blogspot.com/2006/01/remarriage-to-same-spouse-second.html
It should be fun to read about the experience of others who actually made the decision to go ahead.
In the meantime if you need a ood mediator for the future here are some more sites.
http://www.divorcehq.com
http://www.megilamediation.com
http://privatecourts.com
No kidding though - focus on your happiness and good luck, MDH
2006-09-26 11:54:08 · answer #2 · answered by meldorhan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd recommend taking some time, to see whether he's really changed or just putting on a good face for you. Then, as little as most people want to hear it, probably counseling. Make sure whatever issues you once had are out in the open and resolved before you get back into the relationship. Children are involved, so you have to consider what it would do to them to have you separate again after getting back together. My parents did exactly this; they divorced when I was 3 after 22 years of marriage, remarried when I was 6, divorced again when I was 9. It's bad enough the first time. So just take it slow and make sure what you're doing is right, for all of you. Good luck!
2006-09-26 11:46:52 · answer #3 · answered by Chris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
always remember why you divorced him in the 1st place and see if you can handle that if he goes back to his old ways. Also he might be putting on an act to win you back think about that...I think maybe you should date him for the next year, maybe even have him move back in and see if he keeps up this "new" him. That should give you your answer!
2006-09-26 11:45:14 · answer #4 · answered by tweedy778 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I work for a NEW, nationally syndicated show featuring a psychiatrist, and would love to hear personal stories related to this question. After going through so many difficult emotions of a breakup, it's difficult to give anyone a second chance. I'm hoping we can help, please send an email with your phone number to talkshow06@hotmail.com
2006-09-26 14:42:34 · answer #5 · answered by talk s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i say go for it. No you haven't lost your mind. Many people do it all the time. I'd try living together once again to see how its going to work then if everythings alright then go for it. Good luck.
2006-09-26 11:48:10 · answer #6 · answered by BadAssGirlINWV 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes just is hard to get over and course you just to loved him when he was fighting, now he is change but for how long counseling will be the best bet first and then think about remarry again
2006-09-26 11:51:32 · answer #7 · answered by chilipepper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes do it. follow your heart. my fiance and I HAD the same problem, and got back together, things are now better than they have ever been. Maybe try living together again first, to see if things will be ok, and that he's not just saying things to make you happy. Before you take the big step again
2006-09-26 11:44:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a tough desision. I would never remarry my Ex-wife,but then i am 65& happily married to a nice christian gal.
2006-09-26 11:46:11 · answer #9 · answered by Tired Old Man 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it won't paintings and you're fooling your self vast time. in the journey that your marriage become "happy", why did you dedicate an adultery? yet that guy (or men?) you "spiraled uncontrolled" with become no longer "it" the two. that is why you're grabbing at that straw of what "might have been" and mendacity to your self, understanding that it become no longer meant to be. His tale approximately "dealing with the motions" is ludicrous. men do no longer marry for such motives and his spouse had all rights interior the international to react the way she did. She, in all probability, hopes that as quickly as your "steamy reunions" are over with, he would be back along with her, and that is notably logical thinking. Thant's all she wrote.
2016-10-18 00:54:51 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋