I am 24 and getting married soon my boyfriend recently met my parents their spanish and they were hard on him and he was thrown totally off guard with the how do intend to provide for my daughter what type of family does do you come from are you a family oriented person and also having to meet 25 of my relatives at once. I have to meet his family tonight and i am nervous they are Italian and its a pasta dinner with most of his first cousins and aunts and uncles i am really nervous!His mom met me only once and did not seem to like me much?
2006-09-26 08:38:05 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I also suspect i may be pregnant at the moment.
2006-09-26 08:39:35 · update #1
I am really quiet and shy as a person and she is really talkative.
2006-09-26 08:42:13 · update #2
I am nice to everyone and polite but when i get scared i tend to break things!
2006-09-26 09:01:35 · update #3
My advice to you is just to be your best and be yourself and that all you have to do. Don't seek impression because that sometimes tend not to work and Mothers always have a way of seeing behind the facade. Being who you are is the most important!!! Good Luck, I'm sure you'll do fine!!!
2006-09-26 08:45:50 · answer #1 · answered by Yahoo Anwers 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bring a small gift. It can be a small bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine (if they are not religious), or dessert for the meal. Do not go overboard as they might think that you are just brown noising.
Italians are into family and food. Be yourself and come hungry! It would be disrepfectful to turn down food. Eat everything that you are being offered with gusto! Italians pass their plates arounf and serve family style. They enjoy good conversation and eating.
Offer to help clean up after the meal!!! Help setting the table ot picking up after the meal. Do not just sit down and get served, italian women are very proactive in the family meal, so just not sit there. If they decline your offer to help, then sit and relax, but you should try to help out.
Do NOT wear nothing to revealing, too tight or too short. Do NOT wear too much make up. Wear something feminine and conservative, and do not wear black.
Be yourself and enjoy.
Congrats and good luck
2006-09-26 09:12:09 · answer #2 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is one piece of advice I want to give to you. Hopefully if you do get into this family, you will aways remember. Whatever you do, do not snub your future mother-in-law. Be friendly, tell her how much you Love her son. Be gracious, and kind. Make only good comments on the food she prepares. Your family sounds as if they were somewhat outspoken. Hopefully, that doesn't happen to you. Try not to act annoyed. The Mother of your boyfriend will be able to pick up on your attitude, so do all you can to not seem annoyed. Be kind and polite and they will like you. You certainly do not want to get on the bad side. It will not go over good and will aways be remembered. I feel sorry that your boyfriend had to endure that treatment from your family. Hopefully, his family won't do that to you. Keep a low profile.
Good Luck. !!
2006-09-26 08:57:52 · answer #3 · answered by Norskeyenta 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish you luck. I would be yourself and just get to know people.
Just meeting one set of parents at a time is a not the best way to meet inlaws (or future inlaws). The best way is to have both sets of parents and the couple meet at a resterunt (in your case make sure that the resterunt is not spanish or italiian). That way nether set of parents can just pester the boyfriend/girlfriend because they know that they are on display too. Just meeting one set of parents at a time makes them feel comfortable with being meaner that normal because their child will not judge them as harshly nor has any repercussions on the parents. This way the parents can also get to know your family without playing 20 questions and they are more likely to feel comfortable with the parents anyway because they are peers.
2006-09-26 08:56:56 · answer #4 · answered by Lib 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mother in laws are always difficult to deal with, they don't know if you are good enough for their son. (or daughter as the case may be)
Use common sense.
Be friendly, be respectful. Make a real sincere effort to fit in with their culture, routines, etc.
If you know that they don't like certain things that you do or wear, try to avoid doing it. It doesn't mean you are lying or pretending, just putting out a good first impression.
If the women go help in the kitchen, go join them and ask what you can do. Whatever you can do to make his mother think that you are the type of woman she would like for his son.
2006-09-26 08:45:58 · answer #5 · answered by CB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be you . even if your shy thats fine I am the same way most people think im rude right off the bat because im shy but when they talk to me and get tto know they realize im just a shy quiet girl . But if this is going to be your future family you need to let people know "hey im shy but im not rude, i am actually really nice" When you go over greet everyone and then go ask the mother if she needs help with dinner if she says no just keep offering your help and if she keeps denying it then let her be. When dinner is done get up before she has a chance to and start clearing the table and dont listen to what she says just keep saying no really i got it you relax if she gets up and tries to help then offer a service like"ok ill do the dishes"or ill vaccuumm then
2006-09-26 09:33:29 · answer #6 · answered by C I 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be kind, be yourself, and be the person your boyfriend fell in love with. And remember - until you say "I do" you can change your mind and give back your engagement ring if you have one. I wouldn't want to marry someone I had to argue with my parents over, or someone who has to cover for me with his family. Sounds like a recipe for disaster. Have you asked your parents why they were the way they were? Maybe you should - and listen well to what they say. They may see something you totally missed.
2006-09-26 08:47:03 · answer #7 · answered by guyotgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all I wouldn't tell her you may be pregnant. At least not right now. Secondly just be yourself. Your fiance loves you for you and his family should be able to met the person he fell in love with.
2006-09-26 08:47:27 · answer #8 · answered by LJ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be yourself. If they don't like you then oh well as long as your fiancee loves you thats all that matters. Don't try to act and be somebody that your not, just to impress them "just be yourself" Have fun at the dinner. I'm sure everything will go fine.
2006-09-26 08:47:48 · answer #9 · answered by BadAssGirlINWV 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my bfs mother is italian and she loves me....heres some tips....italians love women who can cook...they also like ones that can eat...they will force food on you like there is no tomorrow...try at least everything once they can come up with some very odd foods they get insulted if you dont try it ....they are very family oriented....compliment the food as much as possible get recipes trade recipes...italians love anything to do with food.
2006-09-26 09:34:57 · answer #10 · answered by Jamie Spade 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋