ive been with my boyfriend for a couple of mounths now im 19 years old and he is 24 ive just found out im pregnent his parents hate me because i wont to keep the baby they say im trapping him and i should get rid coz it isnt even a baby yet he wonts me to get rid to i think his parents have got to him coz he was fine at first but it could just be him
2006-09-26 06:58:41 · 52 answers · asked by sarahjayne19 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
If you want to keep this baby, then don't let anyone tell you otherwise! He may or may not stay with you if you keep the baby, but no man is worth doing something you don't want to do. Make sure if he leaves you that he pays child support and has regular visitation. His parents are jerks, you didn't trap him, he trapped himself by having unprotected sex with someone who wasn't on the pill. It takes 2 to make a baby, there is no trap. Do what feels right in your heart, and be strong for yourself and this baby.
2006-09-26 07:02:04 · answer #1 · answered by S. O. 4 · 6⤊ 0⤋
In this day and age it is acceptable to raise a child on your own, if that's what you want, are prepared mentally enough to handle and can afford to do. Children are alot of responsiblity, I have one. I was prepared to raise my child with or without his dad. Not the right way to do things, but I wanted and was ready for a child. I was 22. You are younger than him, so why would his parents think you trapped him? You didn't make him get you pregnant at gunpoint, did you? That is ridiculous. If he was fine at first, then his parents have convinced him you should get rid of it, what does that say about this guy you want to have a baby with. It will be very hard for you, especially if you don't have any support. He doesn't want the baby now, and nobody can tell you what to do with your body, but just be prepared yourself to take care of the baby on your own. Your life will no longer be yours, that baby will be depending on you to provide everything he/she needs. So if you ready go for it. You should definitely cut the father off, relationship-wise, if he can leave you hanging out there to dry when you are pregnant with his child, that doesn't say much about him. He is already showing you how irresponsible he is. He let his parents put all the blame on you for the two of you making a baby TOGETHER. Then he let them change his mind about your baby, he was excited about it at first then all f a sudden he wasn't. Leave him alone he is a 24 yr. old preying on 19 yr. old young girls. Don't take it the wrong way. He wouldn't try that with someone his own age, because they would really make him face up to his responsibilty. All the best to you sweetie, and don't let them make you feel like are totally to blame, he played a big part in all this as well. Let this be a lesson to you, people do not always mean what they say.
2006-09-26 07:19:40 · answer #2 · answered by TRUTH HURTZ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honestly you are so lucky to be pregnant, I'm also 19 and I had a miscarriage 2 months ago and now pregnant again, but it was tough losing my first child and if you are fortunate to be able to have a child that actually makes it through te danger zone of the first 3 months that you will be lucky with the chances of losing it at a 1in 3 chance, as for you boyfriend once he sees that child he wont wanna leave its side, its like when you see big tough guys who think they are the best in the world and melt at the site of a puppy, and just give his family time because your someone new to their lives and they are probably just worried because they haven't gotten to know you through and though so they are probably worried that if they don't really know you how will they know the baby that you and there son created, don't stress your self its bad for the baby, and all will work out in the end just have faith.
Leah
2006-09-28 01:08:51 · answer #3 · answered by leah s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you wanna keep the baby (and that's the right to do) then keep it, if your bf doesnt want the baby just get rid of your bf, he should think for himself is his life not his parents life. You can raise a kid alone you dont need a man many women have done you wouldnt be the first one or the last one just make sure you put that guy on child support, so just stick to what you want and do not have an abortion because that's murder. If you dont think you can do it alone just give the baby up for adoption, there will be a family that will be happy to raise the kid. Good luck!
2006-09-26 07:11:29 · answer #4 · answered by its_me 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Please do not murder your baby. Look up what abortion is and look at the pics of the babies being aborted and the videos of how it is done. Do not let them pressure you into it. One of my neighbors was in the same situation as you and she had an abortion. She regrets it everyday. She is convinced that she would have had her little girl. Don't listen to anyone else. That's a baby in your belly. You are carrying your own flesh and blood. You will regret it for the rest of your life if you have an abortion. I had my daughter when I was 19 . I am going to be 23 when I have our next child. Maybe you should get rid of your boyfriend. You can always tell what kind of husband your boyfriend is going to be when they try to take the easy way out. He is not good for you or your baby. I was not married when I became pregnant either. We married right before our baby was born. I was really nervous ,but I started thinking about how wonderful it will be to be called " mommy ". You should just take care of you and your little one. Forget about everyone else.
2006-09-26 07:15:42 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to keep the baby, then you need to break from this guy and his parents and prepare yourself to become a single mom. It is certainly a baby at this point and it is your baby. You have every right to keep the baby if it is your choice, but you must be ready to switch your focus from being a girlfriend or anything else since being a mom is what you will be for the rest of your life. Look in your phone book under Abortion Alternatives for crisis pregnancy centers. There are many agencies and people willing to help you if you ask for it. You will need to think about getting a place of your own and a job. Tell your family, you will need a good strong support base from this moment on.
2006-09-26 07:12:56 · answer #6 · answered by sevenofus 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's your body and your choice. You make the decision of what you are going to do. If he doesn't want to be with you and you still want the baby talk to your own parents. I'm sure they would be happy to give you all the support you need. If you're pregnant it is a baby no matter what his parents say. Even it is only microscopic size it's still a life growing inside of you. You have to decide which is more important keeping the grown man who can't stand up to his parents or keeping a beautiful child that you will love more than anything else in the world.
I'm a single mother and I know how rough it can be. I'm 31 yrs old and I live with my mom for stability. She takes care of my 2 year old daughter while I work to support us. It's hard and sometimes scarry. Sometimes I even feel like I may have made a mistake in having her because I'm always struggling. But then her beautiful face pops into my head and I know it's all worth it. She is the joy of my life and I wouldn't trade her for anything in the world. Don't let anyone pressure you into something your not comfortable with!!
If you need someone to talk to I'd be glad to help. Email me at charmed142004@yahoo.com. I'd love to help.
2006-09-26 07:27:55 · answer #7 · answered by mystri 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm not going to tell you abortion is right or wrong. Anyone with morals KNOWS it's wrong. But, let me tell you that I had one and I regret it everyday of my life. You may feel like you're in a hole and never going to feel happy or stable again, but you will. No matter if you have one or not, you will feel happy and stable again someday. BUT! You will think about that baby everyday. You'll cry your eyes out on the day he/she would've been born. You'll drive yourself crazy wondering if it was a boy or a girl. You will know that no matter what happens, you've done something you can NEVER EVER take back. I KNOW it's hard. And I know it seems like the easiest solution. But can you really live with it for the rest of your life? Children are a huge responsibility, but they're also THE most special blessing and GIFT that you will ever receive! And if the father doesn't want to be around the child now, just give him time. He may come around before the baby's born or after, or maybe never. It'll be his loss, not yours. It's hard to raise a child without a father and it's not fair to the child, but your baby will have other male role-models. Hopefully a grandfather? Any cousins or brothers? No matter what, it can be done. If you do decide to do it, go to the clinic and talk to them. You'll have a counseling session and then they will set a date if you're ready to do it. I would highly advise you to wait at least a month from your counseling session before you actually have the procedure done. Give yourself time to think about it. If I would've waited just a couple more weeks, I would have changed my mind. Just remember, it'll completely change you as a person, too. Don't let anyone tell you differently. I had low self-esteem before I did it and I thought I was a horrible person. Afterwards, my self-esteem hit rock bottom. Also, I don't want to scare you, but let me tell you, it hurts, honey. It hurts like nothing you've ever felt before. And that's WITH a sedative. I don't know if some doctors put you out completely, but all I had was a sedative, and I've never experienced such excutiating pain in my life...and I've HAD a baby before. But, it IS over with pretty quickly. Still, please think about it before you do something so permanent. Good luck, sweetie.
2006-09-26 07:38:33 · answer #8 · answered by gidget 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm really sorry that you've found yourself in this situation - it can't be easy sweetie.
I'm a guy, so don't really have a "mother's instinct" as such, but what i will say is that you've GOT to do what feels right to you and you alone. Sometimes I think, despite what many people say, that abortion is the bravest thing to do. It must take a hell of a lot of courage to admit that you're not ready for a child and to realise that it wouldn't be fair on the child if it was born to a world/family that wasn't ready for it.
On the other hand, if you feel that you could provide the love, affection and caring that the child deserves and needs then go for it and have the baby.
As for your boyfriend and his family it may tkae time for them to come round to the idea. It's a daunting prospect for a guy to realise he is going to become a father, so be patient.
Good luck whatever you decide to do.
Oh, and ignore the silly b***h that called you a silly cow!
2006-09-26 07:16:50 · answer #9 · answered by Ross G 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ok just think if he lets his parent s make his decisions at 24 what do u think he'll do when u have the baby, they say dont go around her or the baby ,and he starts running from u everytime u call. Do what u need to do for yourself, and if he dont want a baby , hes not gonna take care of u, unless he makes an overnight change, you need to tell him and his parents he should have been protected if there all so against haveing a baby.
2006-09-26 07:05:17 · answer #10 · answered by nicky l 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋