i feel so bad about myself and for the girls i have been with, if you don't want to read about very personal male problems please don't read on. I have had sex with 3 girls, each of them i have started off kissing, got an erection, and then i lose the erection, the 1st girl i never heard from again cause i think she was offended, the second girl i really had feelings for for like two years, i finally got with her and we tried it, it didnt work 1st, we tried the following night and it didnt work again (with and without a condom) then jus recently with this girl we tried it on the beach at night (so abit of kinkiness involved) and i couldnt even get an erection, i have also really really liked this girl and she did me and now she has told me she cant be with me and she gave me the whole "its not you its me" speech. Can somebody please help me, my life is falling apart and i have lost two girls i have been madly into because of my erection problems, SOMEONE PLEASE HELP!!
2006-09-26 06:38:22 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Men's Health
Viagra. Yup I think you better.
2006-09-26 06:41:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is normal!!!! When a guy is sexually aroused, the spongy tissue in his penis relaxes and blood flows into it at a faster rate than it flows out (vasocongestion). That causes a erection. When people get tense and experience "performance anxiety," there are physical changes in their bodies — including the tightening of blood vessels. In guys, the spongy tissue also tightens back up and makes it harder for blood to get in. This makes it difficult to get or keep an erection.
Other factors that can prevent a guy from getting or maintaining an erection include lack of attraction to a partner, a negative body image, a lack of self-esteem, problems in relationships, or using alcohol or other drugs. Certain conditions, such as diabetes, and medications, such as certain antidepressants, can also cause problems with erections.
While most guys occasionally have problems getting erections, if a guy frequently experiences erection problems, it's a good idea to talk to a health care provider, because there can be many different causes. Call 1-800-230-PLAN to find a Planned Parenthood health center near you.
Good luck.
2006-09-29 03:21:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a bit of "performance anxiety", quite normal I think but not often talked about. You do not say whether drugs or alcohol played a part in these scenarios but, be assured, if they did this may be part of the cause of you losing your erection. This is not the end of the world and you will be able to "perform" perfectly well once you have identified the root cause of your apparent anxiety. There are so many other reasons for your unfortunate experiences, eg; age, previous experience/lack of experience etc and I think that it may be useful for you to contact an appropriate agency for further help/support. I am not sure where in the world you are so I cannot personally recommend an organisation. Trust me, your world is not falling apart and can easily be rebuilt with the right help/support. Do it now!!
2006-09-26 13:53:05 · answer #3 · answered by paul h 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Errection of a man acutally depends on how fast blood flows through the penis. The faster the blood flows the bigger the errection goes.
This is badly influence by what you are thinking, doing or saying. All you have to do is think unlimited about sex and be horney. Maybe you are not enough horney. You are completely OK.
Don't be too worry. Calm yourself down. You are probably over stressed. Try having sex easily and take control of everything. Do not be too wild. Take enough rest before and after having sex.
2006-09-26 19:22:43 · answer #4 · answered by koko 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
2 words... Performance Anxiety. Try to relax and don't think about the act. Just be natural. Also, tell her to work with you a bit. if she feels you are losing it, tell her to talk dirty (if that's your thing).
And I agree with others, lay off the porn and the solo action. If it still doesn't work, get some medical help. This is not uncommon for young people and may be curable. Possibly need some psychiatric help because if you do get up once, nothing physically seems to be wrong with you.
2006-09-26 15:45:05 · answer #5 · answered by kettlechipsdude 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go see a dr. You may very well be a candidate for surgery or medication like Viagra. I'm really sorry you are having such a difficult time! If your sexual difficulties are making your life miserable, you really should see a urologist. Good luck, and btw, if a girl isn't willing to hang on through this, she's not worth hanging on to...
2006-09-26 13:44:26 · answer #6 · answered by Angela M 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What I would do is see a doctor to rule out any physical problems. If in the event that there is nothing physically wrong I would talk to a counselor about this problem it might be psychological. In the meantime what you might be able to do is get a cockring to use when you do get a erection to maintain it.
2006-09-26 13:43:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude you just need to relax... Cut the porn out and don't pressure your self to preform or feel like you have to preform. It's all in your head.. Forget about the other times and just focus on her the girl your with and stop thinking about everything else.. if that doesn't help see your Doc.. Good luck
2006-09-26 14:50:41 · answer #8 · answered by Cj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude I do understand ur problem. U need to relax before you go on a date. What I want you to do is when u know you have a date, don't jerk off. I presume that u probably masturbate a lot or watch a lot of porn. You have lost your senses. Try not to watch a lot of porn or masturbate.. This will really help you.
2006-09-26 14:18:34 · answer #9 · answered by Genius 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like it's mostly in your head.. you a very religious guy? or grow up in a religious family? or have parents that were very strict about not having sex? a lot of people have trouble with sex until they get past the fear of burning in hell (no disrespect to religion, i just feel education is a better tool than fear) other than that talk to your doctor because they have a cream for that these days.
2006-09-26 13:43:11 · answer #10 · answered by pip 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you should see a doctor, there could be a problem, yes viagra is good but its only a temporary fix, it could be something simple, dont be so hard on yourself, i think every guy has had that problem atleast once
2006-09-26 13:59:28 · answer #11 · answered by Alan S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋