My hubby and I have been married for 10 years. With two very active kids and full time jobs, we don't have alot of alone time. How can I get the spark back between us?
2006-09-26 05:51:27 · 14 answers · asked by troxy12 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First, congrats on being married for 10 years.
Both parties have to agree that the spark is gone and that they actually want it back. You must both communicate your concerns and desires. People change in 10 years. What they liked to eat for dinner 10 years ago can make them lose their appetite today, and what they thought they would hate 10 years ago makes them salivate today. You must both tell each other what you are "hungry" for.
Then, like every good meal, you must set aside time to prepare not only the food, but the atmosphere as well.
Bon Appetite!
2006-09-26 06:03:43 · answer #1 · answered by lunatic 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
10 years!! wow congrads!! I think that the spark is there but you just would like it to become more of a flame. So here are some ideas...get a babysitter for the whole weekend, book at hotel somewhere further away make sure it has a jauzzi tube as well. Have a second honeymoon. By some very very sexy nightys without him even knowing. And stop along the way to pick up some whip cream and strawberries and of course bubble bath! From now till then do not have any sex what so ever, it will be more specail to wait till that romantic get away. Go out to fancy resturants through out the weekend, go site seeing, sleep in till noon! Have wine while you have your bubble bath together. And just enjoy having each other there. You both will fall in love all over again. Should do this every so often say once a year. Go somewhere different each time. You both deserve to get away from everyone and everything. And focus on just yous!
2006-09-26 06:01:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Plan a weekend (or even one night if you can't do a whole weekend) away for just the two of you. Get grandparents to watch the kids. Anyway, go someplace quiet and quaint (i'm sure you can find a nearby cute little town) and spend the day walking around there. Then, do a nice dinner (one where you need to get a little dressed up), and make sure to have a glass or two of wine. Then, head back to your room. B&B's are great since they usually don't have phones or TV's, so you can reall focus on each other. Try to get a room with a jacuzzi tub and/or a large shower. Light some candles in the bathroom, and take a bath together and maybe you'll make the tub a little hot on your own. ;) Either way, after you've gotten clean (or "dirty", then clean) let him go out into the room while you slip into something special. My favorite is a see through teddy with nothing underneath....EXCELLENT!! But, make it something new that you know he likes. This is a great surprise. Then, you know what to do. Oh, and eventually you'll go to bed and if you wake up during the night, you can always wake him up by going down on him (or just playing if you don't want it in your mouth anymore), and then go for another round.
Repeat as necessary... ;)
.
2006-09-26 06:02:51 · answer #3 · answered by Echelon Right 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think one of the nicest things you can do, that doesn't cost money! Is to take a nice bath together, you have their full attention, no kids, no TV etc. Light lots of candles and place them around the bathroom, have a couple of glasses of wine or champagne on stand by. let him get into the bath first (ensuring ur in a just about there negligee) and slowly and gently wash him all over, then use some exfoliator a fantastic one i can personally recommend is the sanctuary's hot sugar soap, it sends my man wild, it gets really hot as soon as it hits wet skin, then follow with a face mask (this one may take time, my husband is very much a mans man, and a few years ago he would have run a mile from beauty products, but its our little secret!!) cover his eyes with some pads etc. meanwhile slip in opposite while he is relaxing. when he's ready ask him to return all the favors you have done for him!!! Believe me Ive never gotten to the exfoliation stage!!!!! I hope this works for you, its so simple and allows you to focus on only each other, and whether they admit it or not they love being indulged in a little pampering too!
Good luck x
2006-09-26 06:15:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the kids are old enough, send them to a sitter for a night. Go out and secretly buy a new "nighty" or something "naughty". Unplug all the TV's, turn on music, do a little dance and let the sparks get rolling! My favorite from my own experience is to either go for a little walk at dusk, i live in the woods, and supprize him with a bit of "for play" in the wilderness or if you Do get to go out somewhere.....sneak a public quickie...ssshhh
have fun , there are so many different things you could do..
2006-09-26 05:58:49 · answer #5 · answered by Lynn L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, you should not be the only one concerned about this, he should be also. But, you both need to take some time for yourselves. How about when the kids are asleep, you two just take a candle lit bubble bath with a glass of champange or wine, ask grandma, and grandpa to watch the kids for a few hours, go out for dinner, see a movie, and go home for a little while....the most important thing is COMMUNICATION.....you must talk about it, and it should not be a onesided problem.
Good luck, I wish you all the best.
2006-09-26 05:56:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd look for a new type of spark, hoping to achieve what is now a somewhat fantasy memory of how it was in the past will leave you wanting.
2006-09-26 05:54:30 · answer #7 · answered by BOISE_DD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The spark is still there - you are just too busy with your obligations to see it. Take some time weekly to be alone with your husband and you will realize it is still there.
2006-09-26 05:54:21 · answer #8 · answered by purplesax 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just plan a nice wknd for u 2 alone and seduce him well. Tell him how much u missed him and love him, and that u r looking forward to doin this more often.
Goodluck and have fun!
2006-09-26 05:58:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try some night going to somewhere and getting it on. I have found some of the best places to have sex involve playground equipment. There are endless position opportunities!!
2006-09-26 05:57:07 · answer #10 · answered by vanman8u 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋