I love my fiance's little 3 year old daughter Hayden very much! But when she stay the weekend with me or even the night it is world war three trying to et her to back with her daddy! It's making him feel like she dont love him. Her mother signed over all rights to her and wont claim her, he is the only one she has, she means the world to him!! But she throws a big fit when she has to leave my house and go back with him. Should i stop letting her come over?? PLEASE help me!!
2006-09-26 05:44:42 · 7 answers · asked by pitbull luver 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Young children need their mommies. Right now, you are her mommy. The problem is that whenever you send her back to her father, she feels that she is being abandoned again. And, age 3 is the worst time for abandonment feelings in a child. They are very powerful.
Tough it out. Each time she leaves, make a plan with her for her next visit. It doesn't matter what it is. Baking, hiking, board games, whatever. If you make a plan with her and then follow through with, she'll know she's coming back.
Also, just tell directly that you love her, that she can come back any time she wants, and that you can't wait to be her mommy.
Done correctly, this can be positive for her. She will eventually learn that temporary separation (shopping, overnight visit, etc.) is perfectly normal and will not result in abandonment.
2006-09-26 05:54:51 · answer #1 · answered by Otis F 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, let her be in your life. Beleive it or not as she gets older, she will chill out. Three is a tuff age & she is a bit confused right now. It is ok for her to love both of you. Hopefully in time her dad will see how special she is to have other people care about her the way that you do. Maybe when she is with you, you two could make something special for "daddy" and when he comes to get her, she may be excited to give it to him. That might help ease his bruised pride.
2006-09-26 13:06:08 · answer #2 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, don't stop letting her come over. However, try spending sometime over his house with the little girl . Look into why she is having such a difficult time going home. How are things at her dads house? Is it clean? Does she have her own room? Is he an OK dad? Is she safe over his house?
2006-09-26 12:48:41 · answer #3 · answered by Sunflower 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like this in an age-related thing. Life is tough for 3-year-olds in these kinds of situations. Just go with the flow-she will gradually get used to her new routines.
2006-09-26 12:47:50 · answer #4 · answered by retorik75 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is she ok when you are both at her father's house? I know she is only 3, but maybe you should try asking why she doesn't want to go there... I don't mean to scare you but there is so much sexual abuse going on these days that a child who doesn't want to be alone with her father would set off alarms in my head.
2006-09-26 12:55:38 · answer #5 · answered by Ring Ring Ring Bananaphone 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl...i dunno you see...i think you have issues. You just wanna kidnap that baby like those women you see on television do when they're desperate to keep a child in their home! Seriously you have some problems you need to get worked out! And besides...if i was ur fiancee I wouldnt let you see my child...sick freak!!
2006-09-26 13:06:15 · answer #6 · answered by Snap Skittles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let him visit her at your place...
2006-09-26 12:48:01 · answer #7 · answered by mizsinister 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋