My husband and I moved from Tennesse to North Carolina to get away from his family because he was tired of them now he is detemined to move back up there and my family is here. I told him I will not move because it was his decision to move down here. What should I do? Should I stay here and let him move back? Or move with him. We also have a 13 month old daughter and I want her to have a dad around. I am so confused. Please help.
2006-09-26 04:25:51 · 18 answers · asked by jonikaf 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Just some more info. My husband is bipolor and I do not think he is able to make decisions. He was not diagnosed untill we moved here and I think he is blaming the move on his illness which is not right.
2006-09-26 05:19:55 · update #1
Tell him that you and your child ARE his family... He should stay put and visit his parents as often as he can...
2006-09-26 04:31:42 · answer #1 · answered by deakjone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit down and discuss this with your husband. Explain to him that you and he had decided to move here. Tell him what is really on your heart and then make a decision from there. Living in two separate states is not good for a marriage. Someone is going to have to compromise. Also understand this, moving a child around all the time isn't stability for them. It can cause them some kind of confusions. God bless.
2006-09-26 04:41:33 · answer #2 · answered by Wifey K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both of you need to set down and have a long talk tell him to look at the pro and cons what is better for your family here or there you can always go back to visit. Remind him how long you was away from your family if this do not work go with him keep your family together. My step daugther and her family more around so much her oldest son grandmother on the father side try to have the court take him away from her just for that reason.
2006-09-26 04:37:42 · answer #3 · answered by hotbucks6 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
looks like both of you have a huge decision to make, if you stay behind and he moves then obviously that could be the end of your relationship and in fact he would have chosen his family over you and your child. do you want to risk that? but you can look at it the other way as well- if you fail to move with him then you are in fact choosing your family over being with him. Looks like both of you need to figure out what is most important to each of you.
2006-09-26 04:31:12 · answer #4 · answered by doyalikethatdaddy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't matter whose decision it was to move. All that matters is whether or not you love him and want to be with him. maybe you guys could compromise and move somewhere in between the two families.I know what it's like to move away from your family for your husband, and although I miss them terribly, I wouldn't do anything to possibly ruin our marriage. so basically it all comes down to you wanting to stay married or not.
2006-09-26 04:33:08 · answer #5 · answered by tandtfowkes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have a problem in your marriage if you are even considering staying while he moves. Home is where the heart is and is your heart really with your husband? I have been through this...listen to your heart...don't let your head get in the way.
Good luck!
2006-09-26 04:37:09 · answer #6 · answered by hopeym23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow is this a marriage or a tug of war???? Compromise with him.. there is always a compromise.. tell him that u just moved there and u want to atleast wait a couple of years before moving again.. and i suggest next time u settle somewhere in the middle that way its not a struggle of being closer to whomevers family.. and ur in the middle of both families..
2006-09-26 04:29:05 · answer #7 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in sort of the same situation but i have no kids. I think my husband wanted us to move away from my family b/c he wants me all to himself..........so far i stay here with him b/c my family has their own families and i am disabled and he does love and take care of me...........nobody can really tell you what to do but if i had children i think i would stay with him and try to work things out.............good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-26 04:36:08 · answer #8 · answered by VICTORIA L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is your husband. You two need to come to a MUTUAL decision. Don't seperate over where you guys want to live, there are too many kids from divorced/seperated families already.
2006-09-26 04:30:44 · answer #9 · answered by uranium9v 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its his fualt he made a decision n he should of known the consequences and what was coming ... stay there do no run from ur problems men like that will not make up thier mind he'll miss u 2 much STAY THERE if he realy loves u he'll know what 2 do .
2006-09-26 04:29:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does he want to move back? family, job or its always been is home? comprise move somewhere in the middle. or comprise asking to give it some more time,. fly out his parents or buy him a ticket to see them.Marriage is about comprise and understanding. Not what he wants or what she wants
2006-09-26 04:34:30 · answer #11 · answered by livelovelaugh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋