my BF always says go to your room..leave us alone..shut up no one wants to hear you..dont talk..get away..your annoying..your stupid....He never started acting like this till a few months ago, We have lived together for over a year and just about 3 months ago he started acting like this and he tells me im controlling if i ask if we can have a day alone and not have any friends over....is he showing signs of being controlling? Even yesterday i went to the gym with him and he kept saying no dont do that your doing it wrong use more weight use less weight out your hand further apart...i know how to use the machines i used to work out every day for dance and in high school....I'm worried im letting him do to much Opinions please
2006-09-26 04:07:05 · 17 answers · asked by TEMPTRESS 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
He does have an anger problem and i know that but he never did this before! I cant help feeling like i AM doing something wrong to make him act like this! I have ****** up in our relationship (No cheating or anything like that) but i lied to him about seeing one of my exs at a friends house but only because of his temper i knew he would freak and i would never hear the end of it. When i finally told him he did just that and ever since then he jas treated me like this...i feel like i Do deserve it! I NEVER DID ANYTHING WITH MY EX AND WE WERE NEVER REALLY TOGETHER TOGETHER...BUT I KNEW MY BF WOULD FLIP thats just the type of guy he is. and it didnt make it any better that i kept it form him for 2 months...i know he should not talk to me like that but i feel like he has a right since i did that to him...
2006-09-26 04:31:43 · update #1
That doesn't sound like much of a boyfriend. I'd have a serious talk with him about how's acting and how it's making you feel and if things don't change, maybe that'll show you it's time to move on.
2006-09-26 04:10:18 · answer #1 · answered by PrettyProblem 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your b/f is a jerk. Why would you tolerate any guy telling you to "shut up" or "get away" and "go to your room"? This guy is not your freaking father but seems to think that he is. You are not a child! If you do not know how to use the weights, then he should be patient and understanding enough to want to help you by showing you the right way to do it. Everything that you described about this guy gives me no reason to think that you should stay with him. Stand up for yourself and don't let him walk all over you and talk to you like trash. He is very disrespectful to you and do not tolerate it! You need to get rid of him, he's not worth it.
2006-09-26 04:12:48 · answer #2 · answered by melcar12345 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Controlling, manipulating, and just being an "***"
In the end your self esteem with be destroyed, your friends will no longer be around because of him or you, and you will feel trapped since you dont feel good enough that someone better is out there for you, while also feeling like you cant leave him for various reason.
RUN do not walk out the door.
It doesnt sound like he is willing to change, and it sounds like he did already.
Actually, to me it sounds like he is already "done" up with you (the relationship) and is either keeping you around just to have a "buddy", or until the next opportunity arises, or even just to help pay the bills. I mean would you really treat someone you love and care about like that?
2006-09-26 04:15:36 · answer #3 · answered by just me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is showing signs of not only controlling, but a very abusive person. It is time to pack your bags now and hit the road. You deserve to be with someone that will build you up and support you, not tear you down and make you feel bad, rotten, wrong or like you are a pain...Don't wait, you need to get out and leave him alone like he told you to... He does not deserve you at all and he will get worse, this I can promise you...good luck and leave now...
2006-09-26 04:11:02 · answer #4 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
BREAK UP WITH HIM. Nothing can change him, he is just very very VERY controlling and you need to get out of that relationship as soon as possible. Soon he is going to beat you down so much emotionally that you will have no self-confidence and you'll start thinking your "stupid, and annoying" yourself. NO GIRL DESERVES TO BE TREATED LIKE THAT. I know its hard, and i know you probably have ALOT of great memories with him, but seriously its time to break it off. There are SO MANY great guys out there that will never even think of saying those things to you, there are so many great guys out there that will treat you wonderful 100% of the time. Dont you want that for yourself? Every girl deserves the best, you have to start respecting yourself before your boyfriend will respect you. Stand up for yourself!!!! DONT LET HIM TREAT YOU LIKE A DOORMAT!!! If you stay in this relationship, i promise, things will only get worse, never better. Do you really want to hear those things coming from someone you love? It hurts, and it hurts bad. And no body has the right to tell you to "go to your room" tell him to grow the hell up, you can do whatever you want. you are your own person and you shouldnt have to listen to anybody but yourself. So listen to your heart, if you really want this, then stay. But if you want a boyfriend who will treat you wonderful ALL THE TIME, escape this jerk. Im sorry,, but things like this really make me mad because no guy has the right to say anything like hes saying to you. Break up with him, if you stay, it will get worse, you'll continue to go out with him, and when you do get fed up with it, its going to be WAY WAY WAYYYYY harder to get over him. Spare yourself the pain dear, and get out now while you can. Trust me, you will SO benefit from this in the long run. Good luck
2006-09-26 04:14:04 · answer #5 · answered by Ricki M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not only he controlling, his behavior towards you is abusive. It sounds to me like you are in a relationship that is dangerous and have 2 options. One, is to confront him about his verbal abuse and suggest counseling and two, if he refuses, tell him that you will not accept his antics and move on with your life. You deserve better. And.. my friend, he will make you feel as if you CAN"T get better, but from personal experience, you CAN!!!! I would take this matter very seriously BEFORE, he comes physically abusive, which he sounds like he eventually will. Good Luck...
2006-09-26 04:15:41 · answer #6 · answered by allamerican 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Controlling and abusive. There's no excuse for saying "Shut up, no one wants to hear you" or "You're stupid." (You can't spell but you don't appear stupid to me.)
Abusers don't start being abusive until they think that they have you "hooked." It's started because he's gotten comfortable enough with you to start showing you his true colors. He's seeing that you have a lot invested in the relationship, you've stuck with him so far, it wouldn't be easy for you to pull out and move on with your life.
Don't put up with his cr@p! The longer you tolerate the abuse, the worse it's going to get!!! Make him stop or dump him!!!
2006-09-26 04:12:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will get over him in 2 moths or less. He is a JERK. Doesn't deserve you. Unless you have enough patience and do a big talk to find out what's the matter with him. But doesn't seem to me that he could stand that kind of talk. Jerks are jerks.
2006-09-26 04:33:24 · answer #8 · answered by Wintermute 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to your room really? The only time my husband has told me to go to my room went some thing like "honey you don't look like you feel good why don't you go to bed." I would say that he has gone so far over the top that you notice it then there is a problem. I would say deal with it sooner rather than later.
2006-09-26 04:30:08 · answer #9 · answered by rollerbabe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to find someone else. He is controlling and verbally abusive. Why would you want to stay with someone who calls you stupid and annoying? Get out now and find someone who deserves you. Good Luck!
2006-09-26 04:13:04 · answer #10 · answered by Michelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋