Birthday looming. Feeling glum
2006-09-26 01:21:23 · 34 answers · asked by Space Fairy 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Probably because it is the age when we start to realise that we really truly will never ever become an astronaut, or open an award-winning restaurant, or split the atom, or whatever it is you wanted to do when you were 18.
The best cure is to reassess your life - work out what you have been pleased with in the years you have already had, and think about what you really really want to do with the rest of it. Then go and try and make it happen!
I agree with Tim - I found it easier (and felt better) saying "I'm near as dammit 40" when I was still 39.
2006-09-26 02:00:05 · answer #1 · answered by gellhorn 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it is a big deal hitting 40 but that doesn't have to be a bad thing. As a time for taking stock of how much/little you have acheived, you are expected to have sown your wild oats, found a secure profession, probably own your home and found a partner, kids etc. But this isn't always the case and more and more people in the 40s, 50s and older are suddenly free and single again and hitting the town. I am now 44 and have done more in my life since hitting 40 than for the last 20+ years as your priorities change as you gain age and wisdom and some of the ties loosen like children getting older. I have a friend in her 50s who when celebrating her birthday said it was the new 40 where life begins because people are living so much longer so 40 is no longer "middle age" What you need to do is to establish goals which may be easier to fulfil than they would of been even 10 years ago and forget your age as a few on here have said it is only a label like a name.
2006-09-26 01:58:34 · answer #2 · answered by Karen w 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not know why it is a big deal to you it could be that perhaps by the time you reached 40 you thought you would do this or that or have this or that and you have not achieved what ever it is you thought you would.You may now feel disappointed, guilty,sad,a failure, life has passed you by without you realising it. I do not know only you will know the answer to that if it is that.
Making 40 is made such a big deal of unyet really it is just another year older and another year wiser. It is classed a middle age why I have no clue as people live a lot longer than they ever did.
You have so many saying to you "Oh the big 40 wink wink" and that alone makes you feel terrible.
I turned 40 many years ago and do you know what it is true life most definatly begins at 40. Try and think of all the good positive things you have achieved and what is next life is not over at 40 it has only just begun. HAPPY BIRTHDAY OLD BEAN AND WELCOME TO OUR EXCLUSIVE CLUB!
2006-09-26 06:58:26 · answer #3 · answered by momof3 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
40 is the first decade that when you hit it you see how "old" that number seems, and you realize that this is, without a doubt, a "grown up" number. It doesn't mean you're old, by any means; but it is clear that the number is a move out of "still young" and into "new category" (of some kind, even if it isn't "old").
Once the birthday comes and goes what you're feeling will probably pass because it will kind of hit you that you're still the same; but it could take that whole year of being 40 to really believe that you're the age you are. There's something hard-to-grasp about that number. I believe that 40 is the year you will learn how to stop worrying about any number for the most part; and you will use what you learn over the next months every time you move into a new decade from now on.
40 can be seen as the youngest age when you are faced with the shock of not having a reasonably youthful sounding number for your age. It takes a little getting used to, but it will pass.
2006-09-26 01:36:17 · answer #4 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
MY 40th is coming too !! Taking a trip with a girl friend and happy as hell about it !
I have never had a problem with age... Perhaps it is because I feel 12 on the inside and look 25 (so I am told) on the outside.
Alot of people feel the gloom of hitting a big 30, 40, 50 numbers... Only you can change it !
I think of it as : If I don't have a birthday then what is the alternative ? The answer is death, you don't have any more birthdays if you are dead, so I love all my birthdays !!
Be thankful for what you have, do not dwell on the negatives in your life whatever they may be, and always take someone along for the ride down your happy road !
2006-09-26 03:35:27 · answer #5 · answered by Kitty 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not alone. Lots of people are gloomy with the idea of turning a milestone age such as 40. I'm right on your heels, will be 40 in November. It's a normal reaction. When we turn 30, 40, 50, etc...We tend to reflect on our achievements and did we succeed in what we started out intending to accomplish? That is up to you to decide how successful you have been and how you are measuring that success. It may be a time to re-evaluate how you measure. Ask yourself if you may have been too hard on yourself, maybe set the bar too high. I don't think I can say anything to make you feel better, I don't know you and can't wave a flag for your achievements. For me, turning 40 will be just another birthday as I have achieved far more than I ever thought I could when I was 18. I measure my success by how many friends I have, how happy are my kids and am I able to at least provide my family with some nicer things, like a house where they each have their own room (not too hard, I only have 2 kids). Mostly, have I been able to provide them with me? Have I been around. Often people who are overly concerned with providing mass amounts of material goods to their kids spend so much time at work, they are never around. Plus at 40, it isn't too late to revamp the plan either. If you are unhappy with the way things have been going, use turning 40 as a motivation to get things moving in the direction you truly want.
2006-09-26 01:37:14 · answer #6 · answered by Mykl 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because you are entering a new decade . It's just a number . It's what's up front that counts ( in the mind ). Enter the day with a smile-realizing what the alternatives are..to NOT turning 40 ...on that day ..to never have made it that far ..There is nothing glum about remaining alive ! Think of it that way ; and know there is something to that old saying after all.."You're not getting older-you're getting better ".
2006-09-26 07:35:44 · answer #7 · answered by missmayzie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it is a big deal. I'm 42, and I know. These people who say it's just a number. Yes it is a number, smart answer... But it's a number stating that I'm not considered 'young' any more. Yeah, people will say junk like 'you're only as old as you feel'. But the truth is that you've reached a milestone. Here's what I did. Start thinking of yourself as 40 right now. If someone asks, say I'm 40. Don't try to hold on to 39 up until the last, or you'll crash like a lead balloon when the day comes. Start taking care of yourself, exercising, etc. It will make you feel better about yourself.
2006-09-26 01:56:28 · answer #8 · answered by Tim 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because we are conditioned by the society in which we live to define ourselves by our age, to value ourselves by our age and to define the natural process of aging as a negative thing. My 71st birthday will be in a few weeks so I have been there and done that and finally at this ripe old age I have discovered that age really doesn't matter at all. Certainly I am not at 71 the same person I was at 40 or 30 or 20 et al but to my mind age has improved me. Given me a level of knowledge and maturity that I would not trade for the opportunity to be any younger. So celebrate your birthday and be happy that in this day and age you will probably hit your 71st birthday and find out what I am really saying is true.
2006-09-26 01:42:14 · answer #9 · answered by hodgeshirley 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
the most complicated area for me changed into telling my mom that there is not any social gathering, black balloons, bottles of Geritol, or canes. the project i have talked about maximum over the perfect few years is that I do exactly not heal as quick as I used to and joints I damaged many years in the past are turning out to be very effective barometers; If the ankle hurts anticipate rain, if the knee hurts which ability there's a huge low rigidity the front transferring via, if the shoulder hurts that exhibits a extreme rigidity the front transferring via. None of that's existence threatening. i'm in an unusual situation that has the flair to be existence threatening, yet education my nephew to force a guide transmission isn't on the problem of my age. you'd be wonderful. ahead, satisfied fortieth! D
2016-12-02 02:22:51 · answer #10 · answered by plunkett 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋