Tips for getting over nervousness about dancing?

Question

My girlfriend (actually, ex-girlfriend) likes dancing - I'm keeping my fingers crossed that we get back together after some time apart, and just in case I want to be more comfortable dancing so that I can share in something she enjoys. She mostly likes dancing in the living room, but will also dance at clubs. . . .But I'm nervous and have a hard time getting up to shake my booty. Any advice? Are there any do's and don'ts when dancing? Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Answer 1

Keep in mind that at clubs, everyone is so busy with themselves, they don't even look at you. Even if they do, they still think about themselves.

For a living room dancing, I don't think you need to be too consciece about it - not too many people are looking, and those who are looking should accept you the way you are. I'd recommend leaning a new dance - new things are always good. In the living room, you (and your GF) actually have total control over music, so pre-select something that you really like and keep it handy. Find something that really gets you going and keep it by your boombox, or, keep it on softly all evening long.

Answer 2

This is so ironic because I just got over that nervousness for the first time last night at a quincenera. Basically, I was with my friends, and they were all doing it and it looked like it was fun, and better than sitting at a table with people I don't know and not talking to them.

So I just went. I moved to the music. That's all you can do really if you don't know how. Or watch others and try to mimic them.

The main reason I hated dancing before was because I was soooo self-conscious. I thought I looked stupid when I danced or that I wasn't doing it right.

The reality is, no one really looks at you while you dance esp. at a party unless you're dancing with someone. If that someone knows you well, like say your girlfriend, she should know your problems with dancing and be cool with it.

Anyway, the big thing is to not care what others think about you and do what you want to do.

Just do it!

I hope this helps.

Answer 3

remember that UR NOT ALONE!!!! u got her (or whoever) wit you and she (they) just want(s) to have fun. its not like their saying" hey lets watch doofus dance so we can forget how pathetic our lives are". THEY ARE NOT DOING THAT!!!!! if anything theyre just thinking bout ways to get themselves noticed . they aint worried bout you. as a dancer ill admit i get nervous plenty especially being in high school where u can easily get judged by wearing the wrong shoes. lol. but newayz, just learn some moves thatll make u feel confident like the ones at this website

www.urban-dance-videos.com/hiphop-dance/streaming-video.html

theyre fun and ull get a kick outta people saying teach me that teach me that please?!?!?! lol. i know i did. dancing is a sport for everyone and no can be left out no matter what. if you dance good thats when people will start noticing you and for all the right things. have fun and be comfortable with who are. who knows? someone may watch you dance and get their inspiration from you and all of asudden decide to follow their dancing dreams. u could be their "sign" to save them from a decision they would otherwise regret. Live life to the fullest and remember nerves are nothing. they serve no purpose and only get in the way of our dreams. control them, dont let them control you!!!! good luck!!!! and good luck w/ur gf or almost gf.

Answer 4

i love to dance and my husband dont so i think its really cool what your doing when i first started dancing i was real shy thought i would make a fool out of my self then i started dancing in clubs for money you know what i mean that taught me alot pretened that its just you and your mate dont pay atention to any one else and sometimes watching someone else how they dance you can learn a trick or two good luck hope i could help

Answer 5

watch how other people dance, and then string the best/easiest moves together. i get nerves like that too, but dance your heart out anyway, i know people (myself included) who get a high off of dancing, and its probably mostly from the adrenaline, but once i hit it, i dont feel nervous anymore.

Answer 6

being nervous is normal when one starts doing it....just relax [and when your girlfriend and you are together in the living room, ]listen to the beat and move a little, have fun with it and watch what she does, and move with it, [try to do what she is doing.] dancing is fun and you do not have to be a expert to have fun.

Answer 7

i dont really know about clubs but when u r just dancing in ur living room no one is watching and the person that is , is the one person who would never laugh and when she does u will laugh with her trust me..........just have fun

Answer 8

I used to do Ballroom Dancing, my cousin is an International Ballroom Dance Champion, and my Niece was in a Hip Hop Dance Team.

Even though you're talking about regular dance, it's still good to know the evolution of dance. Ballroom is where you interact with the female and have more room to glide on the dancefloor, but the main thing you should know is that it's the woman who does all the flashy moves. The guy doesn't move as much.

This is a throwback from a Patriarchal Society. Because it is traditionally male-dominated, the female is the one that does most of the showing off and the guy doesn't move as much. The attention is more on the female.

The same applies to you. It's where less is more. Although it's a common stereotype, notice how men who appear to be extremely "limber" and "agile" get branded as being gay because they're fluid and effeminate.

Guys are groomed to be tough and macho. So there's less movement. It's more stiff.

The great thing about dancing in clubs today is that you don't have to move your feet as much. When you're jam-packed on the dancefloor, you can get away with remaining in one place.

This is great for you because it means you don't need to do any fancy footwork like you would in Ballroom. That's less for you to worry about because all you have to do is concentrate on everything above the waist. She and everyone else won't be looking at your feet. If it's really packed in the club, you can't look down anyway.

You can actually get away with keeping your feet in place and your knees slightly bent and focus on what you're doing with your shoulders and arms.

Obviously, you're not going to fling your arms around. Less is more so you can keep your elbows at your sides and groove with the music.

You should watch "Hitch" with Will Smith. There's a funny scene where he's giving dancing tips on how not to look stupid on the dance floor.

He's actually makes some points where he says you've got this small little zone to work in. Kevin James is doing all these outrageous moves, which is comical.

You could get away with that in the 1970s and if you're John Travolta with everyone standing on the side watching you, but I'd like to assume you're conservative and don't plan on doing a solo "Stayin' Alive" on the dancefloor.to the Bee Gees.

In Ballroom Dancing, it's all about leading the female. You don't have to do much because when you're in sync with your Ballroom Dancing Partner, she can tell by your movements and how you lead with your hand what you want to do.

Today, you don't have as much touching or leading with the hand, but there is a sort of subtle leading that really good dancers can do. It's more psychological now. If you do it right, the female will take her visual cues from you. That's what she'll expect from you as the male.

If it turns out that she's independent and wants to do her own moves, you can let her go and complement her by mirroring her. Whatever movement she does, you can copy her moves that aren't feminine and you can tone it down to where there's half the effort.

This is really good if you don't know what you're doing and you don't want to completely commit yourself to a dance move. It's a safe move, but it still acknowledges your partner because you're following her suggestions.

If it's a Male Music Artist playing, you can lip sync to the music if you know the lyrics and act like you're serenading her with the words to the song. That always works. Since you're male, avoid lip syncing if the music is a female music artist that's currently on the turntables.

One of the most important things is to FIND THE BEAT. You don't need to know how to dance. Just find the beat so that your timing is on cue with the music that's playing.

As long as you know what the Beat is, you can pattern your movements. For example, if you're dancing and there's a break in the music where there's silence and you're still shaking around moving to no music, you're not on the Beat.

You may want to consider listening to a couple of radio stations that play dance club music or music that is currently popular so that you'll be familiar with the song, the lyrics, and if there are any tempo changes.

Think of it like playing a Video Game:

- The song would be the Video Game Grid
- You're the Video Game Character
- Changes in the tempo or beat would be the Physical Terrain the Video Game Character (you) are traveling on

If you were riding a motorcycle on a race track and there's a turn, you know that you need to lean in the right direction to make the turn. That's the same concept with finding the Beat.

It helps if you know the lyrics of the song because you can do your little pantomimes that depict what the music artist is singing. It shows you know your music. That's a little bit more advanced.

If you don't know what you're dancing to, just concentrate ont he beat. You can get away with just bobbing your head and being fluid with your upper torso while your feet remain in place.

If she dances up against you, you dance up against her. You can do your little Harry Belafonte "Day-O" cradle rock when she's dancing up against you.

Dance has evolved so much and because there's no longer any real formal training, people just dance in circles or just vibe to the music nowadays. It really doesn't take much of anything and more just focusing on enjoying the music.

When all else fails and you don't know the song, just rock your head back and forth with your feet planted. If she suggests some moves with her body, copy them in your own masculine fashion.

You can raise your hands up above your head when you're doing your body rock, but never out where it might hit someone in the face. Watch your elbows and make sure they're close to your body so that they don't bang into anyone around you.

Because it's close quarters on the dancefloor, you'll most likely be doing swaying forward and back not side to side like a penguin when you do your body rock. If it's really tight, you'll do more of a up and down leaning forward action.

Most people are afraid to look stupid on the dancefloor, but if you keep your moves subtle and where your movements are less than those around you, you won't draw attention to yourself.

Survey the crowd.

If you see a guy who seems to know his stuff, there's nothing wrong with experimenting and using his moves and experimenting with stuff.

Think of it like painting where you can develop your own style and be creative.

Most importantly, FIND THE BEAT. If you're moving your body atthe wrong tempo, your timing is off. You can practice by listening to music on the radio and seeing if you can find the beat so you can develop your own rhythm.

I was in Marching Band and the Cardinal Rule of Thumb is you goby the Percussion and Bass because they provide the Beat. In order to walk in step, you have to know the beat or else you'll be out of sync with the rest of the Marching Band.

There's that funny scene in "Mr. Holland's Opus" where he's teaching the kid to play Bass and find the Beat. If you don't know what the Beat is or what I'm talking about, watch that movie so you understand.