2006-09-24 12:48:46 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Other - Social Science
why stay where your not happy, if your not than she's not. Move on with your life.
2006-09-24 12:51:52 · answer #1 · answered by desert_kats 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but 'unhappy' isn't official grounds for a divorce.
Once upon a time, you WERE happy. So what has happened in the meantime? Is it something that can be corrected? You don't say how long you have been married, whether there are any children involved, or how the other person feels about it (is it a she or a he?) so it's really hard to give serious advice.
If you want to try and make the marriage work, then you both need to see a marriage counsellor.
But you don't 'have a divorce' the way you have a cup of coffee.
2006-09-24 19:59:02 · answer #2 · answered by old lady 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would try to work things out, but if it can't be done, then yes it's ok. I would think if you're unhappy, the other person is unhappy too. If there's children, I'm sure they would be happier to see their parents happy. Make them the priority though. I would try counseling first.......but staying in a relationship that isn't working is not good for your health and peace of mind.
2006-09-24 20:00:31 · answer #3 · answered by beth81962 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If that's your reason for wanting a divorce, then I question your maturity and ability to make a commitment. You definitely need counseling and your marriage would benefit from it, too. But if you don't get counseling and do get a divorce, and marry again, you'll most likely find yourself asking the same question. So, if you don't take care of your problems, it doesn't matter who you're married to, it will most likely be the same.
2006-09-24 19:59:32 · answer #4 · answered by Saved 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am in a similar situation. My husband for years had expressed being unhappy with me because I am a no good, lazy, selfish,
low down, mental patient etc etc etc, giving me the cold shoulder treatment while i suffered my depression and was his maid, and finally I cheated on him and gave him a good reason to hate me. Now he has put a spare bed in the recreation room for me, which I have mixed feelings about, but at least I have some privacy. He never kept an adult life with me, even brought my first born 5 year old on our "honeymoon" , one night a the radisson.
Its hard on the kids, who watch every move you make in angry silence, fearing the worse, getting absentminded from the unseen stress knowing they cannot bear to part with either one of us.Its hard to see the battle of who is going to win the favor of the kids. We are doing the counseling thing but that only works for the people who are open to look at their own faults and not blame others. Otherwise, it's not unlike dating for a long time. You get to the point where you cannot go on anymore and one person has the strength to move on, moving away from the icy cold arguments and sometimes beatings and abuse, physical or emotional.I rather would be alone than put up with that, to tell you the truth.It hurts. It blows your mind. But it makes you wake up. The anger is terrible. With my husband, I gave him a reason to get rid of me. I was tired of our marriage of convenience so he could have children when he wanted them. I dropped out of nursing school and stayed home for 10 years. Now, its time to pick kup the peices and provide more income, for me to do what I need to do, with myself and my children as a priority. We are going thru these changes very slowly and gradually, and I have a 5 year plan. I still support all I can do for him, and try to make myself scarce when he's around. Well, good luck with your divorce andI hope you don't have children to deal with like me.
Figuring out how to divorce and separtae amicably is the hardest part. I haven't seen many woman who split with the significant other without harboring a grudge. As long as he refuses to forgive me, why bother.
But you know the old saying, living life well is the greatest revenge
2006-09-24 20:15:27 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you tried everything to make it work then it is OK. Life is too short to be unhappy and this is probably on both sides then. My divorce was 39 years ago and it was the best moment in my life.
2006-09-24 19:57:19 · answer #6 · answered by antiekmama 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
without knowing all the circumstances its hard to say. i don't know how long you've been married but love changes during different stages of marriage. it is not the same as the first years when everything is exciting and new. as the years go on it takes work to make a relationship work. get counseling first and find out what it is you're looking for in a relationship.
2006-09-24 20:03:59 · answer #7 · answered by Diana K 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did you take a vow???? You being content (which is different than being happy) in your marriage depends on you. Marriage is not always easy and no couple is always happy (because marriage is made up of two sinners), but it is a God ordained institution which is not to be torn apart because of the unhappy whims of an individual. Vows are very serious and commitment is hard. Please seek counsel and seek the right thing...which can never be determined based solely on our feelings.
2006-09-24 20:03:31 · answer #8 · answered by Momto6 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes but only after you've gone to a marriage counselor. Divorce isn't easy and is often not pretty. Many people think it's the easiest solution but it rarely ever is. So be sure it's what you really want first. Marriages have lulls and it takes communication and team work to sort it out.
2006-09-24 19:51:11 · answer #9 · answered by misskate12001 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe it's only okay to have a divorce only if you both agree with it. But honestly, try your best to work things out. I'd say try having a serious talk with her about your marriage. If that doesn't work, you both can attend some counseling. Good luck!
2006-09-24 19:54:25 · answer #10 · answered by mjangel28 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a personal decision. Why do people think being unhappy is grounds for divorce. I think you should give it your best effort first.
2006-09-24 19:52:12 · answer #11 · answered by Speaking_Up 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋