I have this innate sense of giving that I've had my whole life. I give and give to the point of it being ridiculous. I give when its not necessary, I give even more when it is. I give when I shouldn't, I give when it hurts myself it it'll help another even a fraction of what it hurt me. I don't believe this is a bad thing. It's very difficult, and it may cost me, but according to my beliefs thats ok. What I want to ask is how to avoid being used. I got my first job (I'm sixteen) a few weeks ago and spend a large portion of my paycheck on people close to me. I haven't bought a single thing for myself- material possession means almost nothing to me. An example would be the Christmas present I'm going to buy for my mother- All ten seasons of the X Files on DVD. (Love that show) Is it inevitable that it breeds contempt for myself to give that much to someone else?
2006-09-24 08:18:40 · 5 answers · asked by fslcaptain737 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
If you are a giver you should be a happy person. And You will receive, maybe not in money but in joy, health and other blessings. I am also a giver.I get more out of giving to others than doing for me. I give when I feel lead to do so. I don't question what the person does with the blessing, as long as my heart is right, I'll be blessed, by being a blessing.
In giving we must also give to ourselves, or we want be a cheerful giver anymore. So bless yourself! Just reading your comments Blessed me, so BLESS YOU!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-24 18:38:03 · answer #1 · answered by dancinintherain 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm exactly the same. I've had three jobs and earned quite a bit of money. As I save up, I keep repeating to myself "Keep it to yourself, buy things for yourself, not others." Yet I always see things I know my sister would love, or my friends would appreciate.
I'm eighteen now, and I still do it, to my constant irritation. But I've got a little trick. I aim for the expensive stuff for myself, and basically drive myself to want that thing more and more. So everytime I think of buying something for someone else, I think "Wait a second, what do I want?"
It takes some getting used to, but it's helpful to remember that other people also have their own income, and that they don't always put you first in their shopping list. Indulge in yourself a bit girl!
Go shopping on your own, for the whole day, and ignore that little voice in your head that goes "That would look lovely on your mom's shelf in the living room" etc.
It's okay to be a bit selfish now and then... ; )
2006-09-24 15:28:25 · answer #2 · answered by Nicole 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I spend a lot of my time helping others - donating my time more than my money (since I have very little of that - and no, you don't have to give me any of yours). It feels good to help others. You probably feel good giving to others. It's also good to give a little to yourself now and then though. Spend a little money on yourself with your next paycheck. At age 16, it's also a great time to learn to budget and save your money. Practice that too. It's nice to give, but you also have to look to your future.
2006-09-24 15:26:41 · answer #3 · answered by TJMiler 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to become my friend:)))
Ok this is probably a need for acceptance. You need to work on that and start controlling it.
You have other qualities that you can offer others aside from material goods.
Focus on those....
Best of luck
2006-09-24 16:17:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A compulsive desire for acceptance?
Try giving to people who are in need. Foundations, donations, etc. why not?
2006-09-24 15:21:19 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋