why fall in love with someone who doesn't feel the same?

Question

this puzzles me big time

how can you feel such a genuine emotion for someone who doesn't feel the same about you; it's almost humiliating if you think about it

can someone explain this but very thoroughly

thanks

Answer 1

Because "stupid" can be find any time and any where

Answer 2

I'd guess you are persevering on some one who does not return your affection because you have no self esteem... you prefer a dream world, and you have no goals for your romantic life.

Make a list of what you want is a spouse (and what you don't want) Education a plus, smoking a negative, and so on.

Feel better about yourself with a little (or big, if necessary) make-over,loose some weight if necessary:begin today!!!! get some great clothes, get a killer smile from the best cosmetic dentist in your area, --- yup, spend some buckos on you, have some great photos taken and put up a personal ad on Yahoo Personals. Sweetie, don't waste your time dreaming about someone who is not available.... there are tons of people out there who want to be in a loving relationship. What you are talking about is a fantasy with someone like a movie star -- who doesn't even know you exist. If necessary, get some help to get your head on straight.

Answer 3

it happens a lot the person that your loving may love u but not the way u want them to and of course u cant make anyone love u if u are in love with someone and they don't love u back its best that u take two steps back and move on i know its hard been there

Answer 4

because you love with your heart and not with your head. you become irrational. if we could think our way through love, the world would be a much better place because we would make better decisions. all emotions are way stronger than we give them credit for. and love is one of the strongest. it takes you over and makes you think the other person does love you too even if they don't.

Answer 5

.You ask a question that doesn't have an answer.

People don't "choose" who to fall in love with its a chemistry that exists and only surfaces when the right reagent is found.

To one guy/girl you could be absolutely everything they ever wanted and hoped for in life while to another you might be invisible

Answer 6

You used the words "fall in love".. If we could control falling in love, then we are not in love huh?

Feelings are hard to deal with.. We feel how we feel & we cant stop feeling a certain way. We can control how we think, not how we feel.. Unfortunately..

I understand what you are trying to say.. Well, if its meant to be yours, it's yours.

Take it easy, yeah?

Answer 7

just because you love someone don't mean they have to love you back.Love should be a two way street other wise it's wasted.

Answer 8

The heart knows no boundaries and love is blind!

"Love is a profound feeling of tender affection for or intense attraction to another. It is considered a deep, ineffable feeling shared in passionate or intimate interpersonal relationships. However, in different contexts, the word love has a variety of related but distinct meanings: in addition to romantic love, which is characterized by a mix of emotional and sexual desire, other forms include platonic love, religious love, familial love, and the more casual application of the term to anyone or anything that one considers strongly pleasurable, enjoyable, or desirable, including activities and foods. This diverse range of meanings in a single word is commonly contrasted with the plurality of Greek words for love, reflecting the word's versatility and complexity.

Although clearly and consistently defining love is a difficult task, and often a subject of much debate, different aspects of the word can be clarified by determining what isn't "love". As a general expression of positive sentiment (a stronger form of like), love is commonly contrasted with hate (or neutral apathy); as a less sexual and more "pure" form of romantic attachment, love is commonly contrasted with lust; and as an interpersonal relationship with romantic overtones, love is commonly contrasted with friendship, though other definitions of the word love may be applied to close friendships in certain contexts.

The traditional Chinese character for love (愛) consists of a heart (middle) inside of "accept", "feel", or "perceive", which shows a graceful emotion.In ordinary use, love usually refers to interpersonal love, an experience felt by a person for another person. Love often involves caring for or identifying with a person or thing, including oneself (cf. narcissism).

The concept of love, however, is subject to debate. Some deny the existence of love. Others call it a recently-invented abstraction, sometimes dating the "invention" to courtly Europe during or after the middle ages—though this is contradicted by the sizable body of ancient love poetry. Others maintain that love really exists, and is not an abstraction, but is undefinable, being a quantity which is spiritual or metaphysical in nature. Some psychologists maintain that love is the action of lending one's "boundary" or "self-esteem" to another. Others attempt to define love by applying the definition to everyday life.

Cultural differences make any universal definition of love difficult to establish. Expressions of love may include the love for a soul or mind, the love of laws and organizations, love for a body, love for nature, love of food, love of money, love for learning, love of power, love of fame, love for the respect of others, etc. Different people place varying degrees of importance on the kinds of love they receive. Love is essentially an abstract concept, easier to experience than to explain. Because of the complex and abstract nature of love, discourse on love is commonly reduced to a thought-terminating cliché, and there are a number of common proverbs regarding love, from Virgil's "Love conquers all" to The Beatles' "All you need is love". Bertrand Russell describes love as a condition of "absolute value", as opposed to relative value.

Types
Agape - the term was used by the early Christians (Greek to be specific, as the word is of Greek origin) to refer to an unconditional acceptance, favour and affinity toward a person. It is a love that is based on a decision instead of a feeling.
Courtly love – a late medieval conventionalized code prescribing certain conduct and emotions for ladies and their lovers
Erotic love (eros) – Sexual attraction or desire toward a person
Familial love – affection brokered through kinship connections, intertwined with concepts of attachment and bonding
Free love – sexual relations according to choice and unrestricted by marriage
Philia - used in the New Testament, philia is a sendimental or conditional love. i.e. "I love you, because..."
Platonic love – a close relationship in which sexual desire is non-existent or has been suppressed or sublimated
Puppy love – romantic affection that is not "mature" or not "true." The term is often used with negative connotations, insinuating that love between youngsters is less genuine or valuable
Religious love – devotion to one's deity or theology
Romantic love – affection characterized by a mix of emotional intimacy and sexual desire
True love – love without condition, motive or attachment. Loving someone just because they are themselves, not their actions or beliefs in particular. Also referred to as unconditional love.
Unrequited love – affection and desire not reciprocated or returned
Lust-love - affection characterized by lust. i.e. The desire to satisfy or gratify oneself.
Instantaneous love - Love that occours the instant that one person comes in contact with another and feels a deep connection or attraction to the other. Also known as "love at first sight" and refered to commonly in many fairy tales and folk lore and literature.
Sacrificial love - the act of sacrificing one's life, or something of great importance, solely on the basis of love.

Scientific views
Main article: Love (scientific views)
Throughout history, predominantly, philosophy and religion have speculated the most into the phenomenon of love. In the last century, the science of psychology has written a great deal on the subject. Recently, however, the sciences of evolutionary psychology, evolutionary biology, anthropology, neuroscience, and biology have begun to take centre stage in discussion as to the nature and function of love.

Biological models of sex tend to see it as a mammalian drive, just like hunger or thirst. Psychology sees love as more of a social and cultural phenomenon. Psychologist Robert Sternberg created his Triangular theory of love and argued that love has three different components: Intimacy, Commitment, and Passion. Intimacy is a form where two people can share secrets and various details of their personal lives. Intimacy is usually shown in friendships and romantic love affairs. Commitment on the other hand is the expectation that the relationship is going to last forever. The last and most common form of love is simply sex, or passion. Passionate love is shown in infatuation as well as romantic love. This led researchers such as Yela to further refine the model by separating Passion into two independents components: Erotic Passion and Romantic Passion.

Chemical basis
Recent studies in neuroscience have indicated that a consistent number of chemicals are present in the brain when people testify to feeling love. These chemicals include; Testosterone, Oestrogen, Dopamine, Norepinephrine, Serotonin, Oxytocin, and Vasopressin. More specifically, higher levels of Testosterone and Oestrogen are present during the lustful phase of a relationship. Dopamine, Norepinephrine, and Seretonin are more commonly found during the attraction phase of a relationship. Oxytocin, and Vasopressin seemed to be more closely linked to long term bonding and relationships characterized by strong attachments.

In December 2005, Italian scientists at Pavia University found that a molecule known as the Nerve Growth Factor has high levels when people first fall in love, but these levels return to as they were after one year.

"NGF level was significantly higher (p<0.001) in the subjects in love [mean (SEM): 227 (14) pg/ml] than in either the subjects with a long-lasting relationship [123 (10) pg/ml] or the subjects with no relationship [149 (12) pg/ml]. Notably, there was also a significant positive correlation between levels of NGF and the intensity of romantic love as assessed with the passionate love scale (r=0.34; p=0.007). No differences in the concentrations of other NTs were detected. In 39 subjects in love who—after 12–24 months—maintained the same relationship but were no longer in the same mental state to which they had referred during the initial evaluation, plasma NGF levels decreased and became indistinguishable from those of the control groups."[1]

Cultural views
Main article: Love (cultural views)
Although there exist numerous cross-cultural unified similarities as to the nature and definition of love, as in there being a thread of commitment, tenderness, and passion common to all human existence, there are differences. For example, in India, with arranged marriages commonplace, it is believed that love is not a necessary ingredient in the initial stages of marriage – it is something that can be created during the marriage; whereas in Western culture, by comparison, love is seen as a necessary prerequisite to marriage.

Religious views
Main article: Love (religious views)
Love in early religions was a mixture of ecstatic devotion and ritualised obligation to idealised natural forces (pagan polytheism). Later religions shifted emphasis towards single abstractly-oriented objects like God, law, church and state (formalised monotheism).

A third view, pantheism, recognises a state or truth distinct from (and often antagonistic to) the idea that there is a difference between the worshipping subject and the worshipped object. Love is reality, of which we, moving through time, imperfectly interpret ourselves as an isolated part.

The Bible speaks of love as a set of attitudes and actions that are far broader than the concept of love as an emotional attachment. Love is seen as a set of behaviours that humankind is encouraged to act out. One is encouraged not just to love one's partner, or even one's friends but also to love one's enemies.

The Bible describes this type of active love in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."