is this love or is she playing with my heart?

Question

we have been bestfriends for 13yrs i feel n lv with her a yr later and told her she said we can only remain friends i understood and respected that to keep the frndship but she does indeed feel the same way about me and does not want to admit it thou she shows her feelings by the way she looks at me she has said shes happy around me we get along so well talk daily when a love song comes on she'll say thats our song like "always"by bon jovi everytime she calls me iam there for her spending time with her giving her money,gifts ect..she has told me she loves me and would be lost without me she has been separated fr her husband cos he cheats&only wants her for sex&has ben out of town she says i remined her of him she has given me signs&gesters that she fels the same i have to move next month she does not want me to&i don't want too but i hav to take care of my mother 8 hrs away&live near her well now my bf has been avoiding me&talking about her husband &datingother people iam so hurt&conf

iam so confussed she has made the remarks about it will be hard trying to get to know someone else after yrs of knowing her husband and me and getting that intimacy back with someone else and its hard for her to look at someone else that way she does not want to move cause she has 4 adult kids and grandkids here she use to tell me things like i love ya or miss ya just talking on the phone now i feel i have no support from her that she even cares was she just useing me or is she really in deneil about her feelings i have did nothing but be there for her always we never had sex or kissed yet but i know she feels the same after all this time i did think iwas n deneil but now i know iam not iam a mature adult and know what love is fr my heart and i know she feels the same maybe shes confussed she was in two long bad relationships before me abusive ones and she don't know how to handle it well thanks for the answers everyone

Answer 1

She isnt worth it if she is going to act like that! You sound very sweet and you sound like you have a good heart. Its a shame that she leads you on like that. Either she cares about you as a friend or she cares about you in the love sort of way. Either way though, she has proven that she doesn't want to ruin your friendship by taking it farther. My best advice is to just play it safe and keep the friendship alive, but as for the love, find someone else! Also, I would be offended if she said that you remind her of her cheating and very unloving husband! Thats not a good thing that she says you remind her of him. Find someone else. Dont let her take you on that emotional rollercoaster.

Answer 2

You poor thing. Life is hard sometimes. but to be honest she had other plans all alone. Your mother needs you and i would give your bestfriend your number of how to reach you and tell her that if she needs you to call. You need to move on for now. Things might change in the future. I have a bestfriend and i also would be lost without him. We have been bestfreinds for 10 years. I am married and he is always there for me. I am having problems now and have been but he is my bestfreind and there would be more between us if i was not married. I Love him and i will never stop he is there for me and i for him. This bestfreind thing goes 2 ways and you need to understand that. She might be moving on cause she knows that you are leaving and she is trying to find a new bestfreind. The other thing that i see is that you are only moving 8 hours away is this forever? If you were her bestfreind she would keep in touch and come and see you. Best freinds are for life thru thick and thin. That is what i have with mine.

Answer 3

It sounds like he has been playing you and using you to have someone to talk to and spend time with since her husband is a jerk. I'm sorry that you got hurt, but there are better fish in the sea. Take care of yourself and your mother and have a good life and find someone who will love you for real and be happy.

Answer 4

Honey, you said the 13 years....in my opinion she is going to completely use you up......I promise she will continue to do this.....with out a committed relationship, she doesn't want you unless it is her terms, and that is only when it is good for her.....when she is hurt and needs something, that is not healthy for you.....go help take care of your mother.....it is only a phone call away......but I also think you should move on find a lady that will treat you the way you deserve to be treated.....you sound like a great person....

Answer 5

Well it's like you said , you two are best friends. I tell my guys friends that I love them. I don't want to be with them. Best friends are supposed to be there for each other. You are a great friend to her from what it sounds. She's just not intrested in being anymore than that with you, so don't push it, you might change the whole dynamic of your friendship. Just continue being a great friend who she doesn't want to loose.

Answer 6

YES SHE IS IN LOVE WITH YOU,BUT MAYBE SHE DONT WANT TO HURT U BY STILL BEING THERE WITH HER HUSBAND.SHE IS IN LOVE WITH U SO MUCH SHE CAN'T TELL JUST HOW MUCH CAUSE SHE KNOWS SHE GOT TO GO HOME TO HIM,AND BE THINKING ABOUT YOU.THATS WHY SHE DONT WANT U TO LEAVE IT WILL TEAR HER UP ON THE INSIDE

Answer 7

omg! i am so sorry! u really sound in love............i wish u did not have 2 move away so u could stay with your b/f ..or g/f? sorry. :) i wish there wus something i could do. but say....... move along, just to make it strong :) ang good luck 2 ya! :)

Answer 8

you need to seriously talk to her dude . good luck. and by the way you sound like a really decent man.

Answer 9

Playing with your heard. Tell her get a divorce and marry you.

Answer 10

ask her out and if she says no then u have a reason to move if she says yes then ask he to move with you good luck