Ok, so if one of my homosexual male friends has a crush on one of my heterosexual male friends, should I tell the heterosexual guy about it? It is a weird situation that I have never been in a similar situation before, so please I could use some serious advice about how to proceed? If you say anything stupid or rude I will report you, so don't waste either of our times, ok?
2006-09-23 18:58:06 · 23 answers · asked by Cat Loves Her Sabres 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Back in California I had really hot straight friend, since I knew he was straight I just wrote it off as the impossible dream and enjoyed the friendship for what it was. Out of the blue a mutual female friend told him, without consulting, or even warning, me, how I felt. He was then unable to be comfortable in my presence and I could no longer trust her. Stay out of it, nothing good can come of your getting involved, all it is is potential grief for everyone concerned.
2006-09-24 06:33:53 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm, that is a toughy. If your heterosexual friend is just that, HETEROSEXUAL..I don't think I'd tell him. Unless he's okay with people who are homosexual. But honestly, I wouldn't want to get any trouble started. Just let things play out as they are. I know it's hard not to get involved because they are your friends...but just be the fly on the wall for now. :) Good luck.
2006-09-23 19:31:37 · answer #2 · answered by LetosGurl85 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, first things first: If you weren't asked by your homosexual friend to tell the heterosexual about his crush, then don't, as that's not your business to share.
If you were, that really is a personal choice of yours. I would suggest that it's probably better if your homosexual friend confronts the issue personally, but that's between you, him, and your mutual friend.
2006-09-23 19:01:32 · answer #3 · answered by Khaz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. They are grownups. Let them work it out for themselves. If you get in the middle you will probably just feel trapped and the homosexual could hate you for opening your mouth. People get crushes all the time, homosexual, heterosexual, without people getting involved. Do yourself a favor and shut up.
2006-09-23 19:12:59 · answer #4 · answered by Justme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maria Theresa,
Okay:
1) You know them both, we don't. So use your judgement on whether to tell.
2) It is not clear that they know eachother. It might strike the Hetero friend as threatening. You might not want to tell him, but have them talk for a while, perhaps with you at a Coffee Shop. That way the Hetero male can see the other in a better 'light' ?
3) At any sign of discomfort; stay out of it.
2006-09-23 19:12:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you have a not so uncommon problem. I too have friends that are gay and straight, No I wouldnt tell my straight friend that my gay friend had a crush on them, I just find that it makes every one uncomfortable after the crush is revielved.
I had the same situation some months back, I just straight up told my gay friend that that I know for sure they wouldnt be intersted and please dont approach them. I feared for a bad out come. Good Luck
2006-09-23 19:07:42 · answer #6 · answered by stormyjoem 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why get involved in that situation at all? Why not let your friends involved work that one out? If your gay friend asks for your help or involvement, feel it through. Maybe your getting involved would be a good idea, maybe not. You'll probably know what to do. You are not obligated to involve yourself in every situation your friends get into with each other. Think if it would be sensible for you to involve yourself; ask yourself if you really want to. Also, check your motive as to why you want to play go-between. Are you a doormat? Are you a drama addict? Do you think you could help in a constructive way here? You'll know what to do.
2006-09-23 19:05:42 · answer #7 · answered by Bronweyn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's best if you keep it to yourself.
Consider, if your gay friend wants your straight friend to know how he feels, then it is up to him to decide how and when for himself. If your gay friend is asking you to mention it, that's a different matter - but otherwise it's not your place to go behind your gay friend's back and tell something he said to you in confidence.
Suppose it was a girl friend who had told you that they liked your gay friend; Or suppose the situation was that the straight Friend said he had a crush on a girl friend of yours?
Either way - if you keep out of it there's no harm done, but if you say anything - then someone is probably going to get hurt because you betrayed their trust.
2006-09-23 19:12:43 · answer #8 · answered by Michael Darnell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd probably stay out of that. Just as I would if it was a girl having a crush on a guy. If your homosexual friend approaches you, I'd simply tell him that your other friend is straight, and he's barking up the wrong tree. Everyone has crushes... they're healthy. Just nip it in the bud if he asks you about it.
2006-09-23 19:01:01 · answer #9 · answered by abcdgoodall 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whether to tell your heterosexual friend is NOT your decision to make. Its up to your homosexual friend.
You need to offer your homosexual friend support and advice. Sure, he might want your heterosexual friend to know - thats up to him, and how he communicates this is also entireley up to him - whether he asks you to do this, or he does it himself.
One potential problem which could arise is your heterosexual friend taking a strong disliking to your homosexual friend as a result. Could your social circle handle this? I guess the probability of this scenario depends on how homophobic your heterosexual friend is - and also his understanding of the fact that people can't control who they feel attracted to.
2006-09-23 20:55:32 · answer #10 · answered by nemesis 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋