i hate being shy but i dont know how to change it. i get tongue tied all the time. at times i cant look people in the eye. i say words i didnt mean to say. everything just comes out so wrong. i think it has to do mostly with me getting picked on as a kid. i know im not a kid anymore, but somethings just stick.
2006-09-23 16:34:19 · 10 answers · asked by ? 5 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
:) the more u work on urself, the better u will feel. *trust me*.
so having said that, work on:
1) your appearance: work out. exercise. take care of ur body. take care of ur skin. get new haircut. try on new clothes. buy Flattering, stylish clothes, make u feel good and look good.
2) your mind: study. read more. learn more about current events. find a hobby, and excel at it. the more u KNOW, the easier it will be for you to develop your own ways of thinking, as well as be able to TALK w/ others about it.
3) your relationships: as u build ur confidence in urself, and keep in mind to be Open Minded, Non Judgemental to others..... u will be able to speak out more, talk to ur friends, family members, practice talking about anything and everything u are learning, or find out what they are interested in. the more u practice, the easier it will be for u to do that with Strangers, or friends of friends, and not feel as shy...because remember, 1 & 2, u are already working on ur appearance and your brain, so u don't have as much to be "scared" about.
:) good luck...the more Positive attitude u have (remember, u can Always change something if u make a mistake, u can learn from it, u can always grow, and do something different tomorrow), the more opportunity u will have in ur life. confidence will lead to easier job interviews, class discussions, making friends, getting to know teachers, etc etc.... huge impact on ur life. but getting over ur shyness is the first step, and working on ur confidence will help u become less shy.
2006-09-27 05:41:21 · answer #1 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know EXACTLY how you feel. I didnt get picked on but I always felt like an outsider. Whenever anyone talked to me that I didnt know I usually squeek or my voice cracks(it still does). I think it definitely has to do with my low self esteem. Find something that you are good at or enjoy and do it! I really enjoy tennis and I signed up for a class and it boosted up some esteem and it forced me to meet people. I can honestly say as much as I hate talking to strangers I should probably get a job where I have to deal with them, it will only help me able to talk to others later. I suggest you do the same. I dont know how old you are but you can always join little groups or clubs. Im not talking about joining the "shy peoples group", but more like joining an intramural sports team, or get into a crafting club or just do anything where you will meet people that have the potential to be your friends. Thats what I try to do, good luck!
2006-09-23 17:54:25 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shyness comes from a few things, but two things specifically, it comes from a lack of personal self esteem or confidence, also a lack in the area of socializing. The best way to overcome shyness is to simply not be shy, but easier said than done right? Probably not a person that goes out much, or really puts yourself in a place where you have to be with strangers. This is the best enviroment to really work on shyness, a party or a social gathering. The more time you have socializing with people the more used to talking to strangers you become. Remember that everyone is just as human as you, a simple hello followed by a "what do you do?" or "How are things?" Is enough to start a conversation, even if it is about something you know little about, inquire. That is how I usually break the ice, I use to be quite shy, but I replaced my shyness with curiousity, a lot of fun getting to know people, what they do, how they live, what makes them tick. Best of luck.
2006-09-23 16:41:59 · answer #3 · answered by buxiu_demon 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain. Growing up, I was always tall and skinny. I wanted to be small and inconspicuous where no one would notice me. I swear if someone said "Hello" to me I'd pass out. I couldn't speak.
Then in college I got a job at the Disney Store. I HAD to talk to people! I found out it wasn't so bad. It did a lot to help. Put yourself in situations where you know you will have to speak. Kind of like trial by fire. Start with small groups at first if you can. You CAN do it!! I know if I did, anyone can. Good luck.
2006-09-23 16:39:12 · answer #4 · answered by Uncle Heinrich the Great 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Try practicing talking to yourself in the mirror. You might think this is silly, but by practicing opening conversations, you will find it easier to say the same when you actually meet people.
Also, read some of the self-help books on healing, recovery, etc.
2006-09-23 16:40:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you describe borders to social phobia and such problems are best to battle with cognitive methods like exposing you to a little until safe and then exposing some more.a way to train it away it since you probably is as great person as he next one and if you manage to get a inch off the load you will get power to go the whole mile.but in not sure if its necessary with cognitive therapy,
this you could do with a friénd.
good luck.
.-)
2006-09-23 17:30:15 · answer #6 · answered by idiotjim 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to know the issues so you can be confident about what you talk about. Only mixing with people is going to break you of your shyness, but as you do it will be a rush.
2006-09-23 16:58:03 · answer #7 · answered by Delta Charlie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take acting classes. You will get over your shyness. You may be able to find acting classes at the YMCA or YWCA in the city where you live.
2006-09-23 16:42:58 · answer #8 · answered by . 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ya when u talk to someone look them straight in the eye and if u cant just think that ur life is at stake and if u dont look them straight in the eyes u will die...
2006-09-23 16:39:08 · answer #9 · answered by colodge_25 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
talk more
2006-09-23 16:45:13 · answer #10 · answered by sd;jsdfj; 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋