life? Was this your experience at all?
2006-09-23 15:16:30 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Parents living their lives through their children - forcing them into activities to make up for some failed childhood.......hmmmm, sound a lot like cheerleading moms.
2006-09-23 15:24:38 · answer #1 · answered by oscarschic 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I don't think that anything is ALL true. There are no absolutes.
Perhaps some people do have private agendas, & others do not. This wasn't my experience, but doesn't exclude the experiences of others. A rhetorical question (of course) but how do you feel about yours? To believe this pejorative concept is awfully damaging. Fascinating that you asked this. I'm now working on my second draft of a satirical book: YOUR PARENTS ARE TO BLAME FOR EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED TO YOU. (I'll probably change the title, but you get the idea, yes?)
2006-09-30 01:19:30 · answer #2 · answered by Valac Gypsy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that was your experience, then I feel for you because that is not what all parents do. In fact that is contrary to what parents should do.
It is natural for parents to be aware of their own faults and failings and to want their children to do better. Sometimes they go overboard and try to relive their own youth by means of their children by overemphasizing their own lost goals. This is wrong. Parents should encourage their children to find their own goals and achieve them.
My parents didn't try to make me into a copy of them although my Dad always harbored a not so secret desire to create a family business with each child contributing their particular expertise into the family business. I even saw possibilities in that direction but our personalities would never work together in a business.
Likewise, I don't try to make any of my children to be copies of me. I want them to find their own talents and to achieve their own goals as long as they are worthy and productive.
God gave us agency to use as best we can to learn good from evil and to learn from our mistakes what not to do so that we can become the best people we are able to be. Parents should be no different. We should encourage agency in our children while still instructing for good and warning of dangers that our children may not be aware of.
So the short answer is no, not all parents have private agendas. If your parents do, then I hope you escape and I also hope you don't carry out any private agendas on your own children.
Best wishes.
2006-09-23 23:30:48 · answer #3 · answered by rac 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is true every child is lived in the minds of parents,but it is not exactly true that they exploit their children for their selfish ends.Growth of us from a child to a healthy adult has tought us to give appropriate freedom to our children to grow healthily to their adulthood.I n this,where is private agenda and using them for our ends?
2006-09-23 22:38:45 · answer #4 · answered by ramraj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are a lot of parents who try to "live through their children". It is a sad sight to see! You see it at Little League games and the like. Not all parents are this way, but a surprising number are!
2006-09-24 00:02:48 · answer #5 · answered by Delta Charlie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that all parents do have that agenda, to some extent.
I personally am putting my kids in hockey, something I wanted to do, but never go to.
I'm also making my kids play an instrument, something I've been just recently doing.
I think so, yes.
However, I also think that most parents want their children to fare better than they did.
I certainly hope my kids do.
2006-09-23 23:08:02 · answer #6 · answered by Deutscher Eishockey Bund 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, this is especially true are asian parents because of the cultural customs that children should honor their elders. In seeing this, children are expected to take care of their parents at old age. You could say that asian parents have kids as a retirement plan.
2006-09-23 22:31:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not think it's true that ALL parents have a private agenda.. but I'm sure some do.
2006-09-23 22:19:16 · answer #8 · answered by SassySista 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Absolutly Not! No I never experienced such a thing. I,m sorry that any would.
I think most parents put the needs of their children ahead of their own.
2006-09-24 00:56:24 · answer #9 · answered by ~♥ L ♥~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is really a sick way to look at parenthood. Parents WANT their children to have a BETTER life than they had, and to NOT have to struggle and work so hard as they HAD to when they were growing up.
2006-09-24 00:50:28 · answer #10 · answered by sglmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! Unless hoping my child feels good about himself, and is as happy as can be expected in life is a private agenda. Although I've told him this is what I hope for him, so it isn't that private.
2006-09-23 22:23:56 · answer #11 · answered by zoey1038 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋