They say a woman's first time having sex is unforgetable, for better or for worse. At 22, the thought of actually having sex has come across my mind thousands of times. I want to set up realistic expectations, and I'm willing to learn from the experience of others. Here's my question:
(1) (a) What was your experience (Good or Bad)?
(b) What made it good or what made it bad?
Rest assured, I know about STDS & protection.
Thanks for the insight, in advance.
2006-09-23 14:55:53 · 12 answers · asked by ßella 2 in Health ➔ Women's Health
I was actually 23 my first time. I think it was worth waiting till I was mature enough to do it on my own terms and not out of peer pressure, insecurity, whatever... I waited till I was in a relationship with a guy I trusted wholeheartedly. I wasn't actually in love, but it was a loving relationship. So it was good, from an emotional standpoint. Physically, it was .. not bad. My virile lover lasted all of about 40 seconds =). But it was nice, and nothing hurt, nothing bled. I wasn't really worried about how I did - it comes to you pretty naturally, especially if you've ever read Cosmo - you've pretty much got all the info you need. I would say, no, you can't expect your first time to be mind-blowing, because you get better at it (better at enjoying it) as you go along - but the "practice runs" are pretty fun anyway =).
I think something subtle does change after your first time, for better or for worse. You think about sex more, or at least differently, and there is a little innocence that is lost, but c'est la vie. I don't know if life was much better or worse before and after, just a little different.
As long as you keep yourself safe, with good people, go nuts =)
2006-09-23 15:28:16 · answer #1 · answered by brightnbewildered 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was 18, with my boyfriend who I'd been with for about 4 months.
I was very nervous, and had pretty rock bottom expectations because I'd gotten myself into a bit of a state about it.
It was fine. The worst part was that I had this super-tough hymen which took 6 goes to break, but after that everything was pretty smooth sailing. There was some pain, quite bearable, and nothing bad happened. I felt like a bit of an idiot because I didn't know what to do, but my boyfriend was patient with me.
Afterwards, we had sex twice more in different positions, and that was fun. I wanted to see if sex would be different from the first time (it was). I didn't reach orgasm or anything, but I enjoyed myself.
Oh yeah, and we used condoms.
2006-09-23 15:44:19 · answer #2 · answered by Girl Machine 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was way unprepared. We waited until we got married, which was good, but I should have talked to more people or read up more.
Seriously, I can't be sure when our first "time" was because we couldn't get it in for about a week. It was painful and difficult and I was incredibly sore, and probably nervous and too tense. When he was finally able to stay deep enough inside me to come that was the best day of my life! I hear there are things you can do to sort of stretch your vagina out. This may sound naive but his dick was way bigger than i had imagined! And maybe he wasn't pushing hard enough because he could tell he was hurting me so I'd make him stop.
It's gotten a lot better since then, a lot more comfortable and we're having more fun now!
2006-09-27 17:14:48 · answer #3 · answered by gafpromise 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
LOL!! Don't worry, I'm only laughing because my first time was HORRIBLE!! We were both virgins (I was almost 18 and he was 19) and he asked me where the hole was. Can you believe that?! Anyway, it hurt like hell and wasn't the least bit enjoyable, although he tried everything. Now that I look back on that experience, I realize that, for the most part, it was due to inexperience and tension from both of us.
Note: It still wasn't enjoyable after three more tries and subsequently, I moved on to seek an orgasm and lucked out with an experienced man. THAT experience was GREAT!
2006-09-23 15:27:07 · answer #4 · answered by Mazzy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It was physically not so good, but emotionally since I was madly in love with the guy, it was ok enough to want to do it again.
Sometime.
When we did it again, it was still clumsy and awkward (we were both too new at it!) but over the course of our relationship, we got better and better at it. We were able to experiment a little, since it was all so new to us, we didn't know what would feel good, or feel bad.
As far as your expectations, sex is generally uncomfortable if you rush into things, both emotionally, and physically at first. But as you get more comfortable - both with your body and their body - and learn what feels good to each other, it does get better!
So if your first time is "ok" than you can expect things to get better! If your first time is great, then that's terrific for you!
And finally, you claim know about the mechanics of STDs and protection, but be careful with your heart, too. It's easy to fall into lust and think it's love (for either partner!), so just go slow. Get to know your partner and make sure that they are worthy of you.
2006-09-23 15:44:27 · answer #5 · answered by cjsu 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I was 25 when I lost my virginity (honest!). It was a good experience, because the person that I was with was experienced and knew that I was a virgin. It was good because he was pretty gentle with me and understood that it was my first time. I did bleed a lot afterwards.
2006-09-23 15:45:18 · answer #6 · answered by lonely_girl3_98 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I was TOO young at age 15. It took 2 imes to break my hymen and it was horrifying. But, you are older and more mature. Relax and be with the one you love! It gets better with practice. I know it sounds corny, but it is true.
2006-09-23 15:01:33 · answer #7 · answered by Christine B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was 15 raped [Now 18 and engaged](he is still out there stalking me) :S and the second time having sex was great i was with my finacee and he lost his virginity to me...:) that was sweet he looks at me and says "WOW" lol otherwise if your with the one you love you will enjoy it...:D surprising enough he knew what he was doing perfectly...lol but enought chit chat
2006-09-23 15:43:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well bella i am a man and i just wanted to reply to help you out in your thoughts and all that and because i think your strikingly beautiful. You obviously at age 22 have either held out or waited for a good period of time because either you wanted it to be special or feel real comfort in having sex for the first time. For my first experience it was with this lady named maria rodrigez i am from nebraska and she was illigal from i think monteray mexico. We had dated probably 8 months before we did the sexual thing and about the ninth month we went all the way. It was unbelievable i mean its truly beautiful when two people come together for there first time specially if its her first time as well as yours. The reason is because both have so much tention build up its only natural to release that sort of thing. We did not have protected sex, but we took the chance. As a man i can truly say to you the best way to have sex is to have sex build up and by this i mean make eachother hot for one another a good period of time before you just jump in and do it. Why? Because all that tention builds up and when it is released it is that much stronger an example of this is a man who hasnt had sex in months is much more likely to release a big load which usually is a ultimate feeling rather then a man who has it everyday. So my advice to you if you want to have great sex is dont do it all the time let the tention build up and release like you never released before. We talked about our first time together asked eachother what made it so great. It only lasted 4 minutes the first time and we both got off at the same time which is rare, but when all that tention is built up wether it be 4 minutes or 2 hours it feels so great when you release it. As a virgin you most likely will want to take it slow tell him to be gentle because if he starts ripping away then your first time most likely will be bad and painfull. After your first time and when you get use to it most women go to another type of sex not ruff but faster harder sort of thing but for you take it slow first time. Another thing if its your first time you most likely will wet quickly even before you get started because your anticipating that sex will occur and that will get you a little wet (sorry if this is to deep but its true) but lets say your not wet before you start for your first time please make sure the man your with fingers or licks you a bit before he just jaggers his penis in you. Why? Because if he goes in when your not wet it usually hurts real bad the first time. Make sure he takes the time to get you a little wet. You dont have to orgasm or anything right there and then but let your juices flow a bit before he goes inside. You may choose to use a condom i am in no way trying to convice you what to do but the ultimate feeling is and always will be with out a condom because the feeling of a man releasing deep inside you not only feels so good for him but feels realy good for you as well. Good luck and hope your first is a memory that brings good thoughts.
Thomas Longshore
Omaha Nebraska
2006-09-23 15:13:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 3⤋
Good
because my bf and i were losing our virginity together
2006-09-23 15:01:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋