PLEASE HELP, I am 13, for about 2 months i have thought i was bi, I dont want to be bi, i have a boyfriend, and I LOVE boys, but latley i have been thinking about girls having sex, and me having sex woth girls, I HATE IT, everytime i have these thouhgts i telll myseft so stop, and when i am along i just cry, i dont wasnt to be bi, but i am so scared i am, I CRY ALL THE TIME. I told my mom, and in a month i a going to a theripst, i hope i can get help there. I pray to God everyday to help me not have these thougts, but its not helping me. If someine could please help me, If you could PRAY for me, i would appericate it, I have heard that alot of teenagers have these problems, If you had these problems wien you were my age then could you please leave your email address!!! PLEAESE I NEED HELP I HATE THESE THOUNGTS, I HAVE EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT KILLING MYSELF!!! i HATE THIS!!! I NEED HELP!!!!!
2006-09-23 13:22:08 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
Okay, calm down. It's not as bad as you think. It's normal sometimes to fantasize about girls and not be gay or bi. If you really were, you wouldn't be upset about it and would consider it a natural part of you. But since you hate even the idea of it, it's very doubtful that you are bi. When you go to see your therapist, he or she will probably tell you the same thing. I'm sure there is some psychological reason for your feelings, and being gay or bi has nothing to do with a mental problem. Homosexuals are born that way, and they don't consider it to be abnormal for them. Also, you say you love boys and you have a boyfriend. I think your thoughts about girls might just simply be curiosity -- you wonder what it would be like, but I presume you've never acted on this curiosity. What concerns me most are your suicidal feelings, which is another reason I feel your worries have a psychological origin. By all means, talk to your therapist and be really up front with this person -- tell him or her everything and don't be shy about it. They've heard it all. Now dry your tears and put away your fears. The problem can be resolved, and it's more common than you think....Good luck, dear!
2006-09-23 13:34:55 · answer #1 · answered by gldjns 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you seeing a doctor was a wise choice for you and your mom! Those are the people you need to speak with. I just have a thought here Amber, Is it a "feeling" that you want to have sex with another girl or is it just curiosity in thinking what it would be like to have sex with another girl? There's a big difference in the two! Another question is whether or not you have already had sex with your boy friend. If you did and it wasn't a good experience you may be thinking it "could" be different with a girl! Is this "girl" thing a new feeling or have you had it for awhile? Sex is so freely open and talked about today and girls seem to be younger and younger when they start experimenting! Have some of your girlfriends tried it and talked to you about it? Maybe that's made you curious? These are just some of "my" feelings about why you may feel the way you do! This is something for you your mom., and the Dr. to discuss! I'm very glad that you trust your mom.You're very "young" to have to worry about this kind of problem and I'm glad that she can be there for you. You'll find your answer but it won't be on here. best of luck , another mom
2006-09-23 20:52:55 · answer #2 · answered by noditz57 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay - child - get a grip - stop the drama - your feelings are natural at your age - NO BIG DEAL - Okay? All teenagers have these types of thoughts - it just means you are tyring to find yourself and your sexuality...it's not a permanent condition - it is totally transient(it willpass)... just RELAX already - you are not damned or Going to hell or any other such nonsense...give it some time - quit getting hysterical... confusion is a normal, natural part of adolescence,, and you WILL work your way through it. Just talk it out with your therapist without fear or shame and I guarantee you WILL find your way. Calm yourself--it is not the end of the world - it is the beginning! yOU ARE LEARNING ABOUT YOURSELF AND THE WORLD.
2006-09-23 20:49:51 · answer #3 · answered by weezyljm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello,
Don't worry, 90% of people THINK about sex in a broad range from very gay to very straight. Your thoughts are NORMAL!
A VERY wise psychiatrist told me that you can THINK anything you want, no one will ever know what you are thinking, and thoughts can be the 'wandering of the mind'. More important is what you SAY, as then it depends on who hears it. What you say can be recorded, and, as in the Law's Miranda warning "whatever you say can be used against you". Of greatest importance is what you DO. You have not ACTED on your 'bi' thoughts, and therefore are NOT "bi" (ambisexual is the accurate term). It is good to see a therapist, you are beset by guilt and shame, and you don't need to be, thoughts are FREE!
Andy
2006-09-23 20:27:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just calm down hon, its normal for alot of girls your age to think about crossing the heterosexual line and start visualizing sex with other girls, its a normal bodily function to at least think about it, even I have thought of it from time to time, but knowing that you and I would rather be with boys, or guys, (I'm married now) at least you're thinking on the right track, just try to push it out of your mind when you start thinking about it and start thinking about your boyfriend more. Try talking to him about this as well if he is understanding. I will pray for you and don't ever stop praying for help because your prayers will be answered.
2006-09-23 20:28:44 · answer #5 · answered by odafintutuola 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is an evil force luring in your mind, every time u have these thoughts just say in the mind.....rebuke ye devil by the blood of Jesus and these thoughts will go away naturally.
There are evil forces in this world that will get in the mind and try to corrupt it and u, dont fall for it or give it the power.
Love yourself and u can handle this yourself without a therapist.
2006-09-23 20:26:10 · answer #6 · answered by sunflare63 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being bi-sexual is nothing to hate about yourself. If you definitely know that you "are" bi-sexual, it's something that you just can't help. Please don't torture your mind so much. Yes it will be hard, because you have a bf and it sounds like your family may be religious. But in my opinion honey. God loves his children so much and unconditionally. He loves us no matter what we do or who we are. He gave each of us the power of free will. And he created each and every one of us. So if he so loves his children why would he condemn something so beautiful to him?
Take some time and really think about what you're feeling. Who knows it may just be a fascination with girls that you have. I
And please please take those awful thoughts of leaving this world out of your head. The world needs you far too much to go and do a silly thing like that.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
God Bless Always.
2006-09-23 20:33:14 · answer #7 · answered by Christina R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Calm down, the fact that you love boys is enough. Whenever you start to think about it again remember your boyfriend and how you feel when you are around him, and hopefully I will pray for you. But you don't give up your prayers.
2006-09-23 20:42:50 · answer #8 · answered by Hayla 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wouldn't worry about being bi, just because you think about girls....almost all girls have thought about it at some point in their life.some have even acted on it. i'm not saying you do, but thinking about it doesn't make you it. and i'm sorry you're frustrated, and definitely don't kill yourself over something like this. just keep up with your prayers and your therapist and it will all work out.
2006-09-23 20:31:21 · answer #9 · answered by J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to stop worrying, if you don't want to become a lesbian, then you won't. You and you alone control your emotions. At your age it is common to have such thoughts, but rarely do they take effect, even if you had experimented with one on one girl sex.
2006-09-23 20:26:51 · answer #10 · answered by Dale 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋