My mom is married and my stepdad has been wonderful to me and my brothers. I am extremely close to my dad and I love him to pieces. I want to have both of them in my wedding but I am not sure how to fit my stepdad in without offending my dad. How can I accommodate without making anyone left out?
2006-09-23 12:13:00 · 18 answers · asked by Tzipor 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is the way I solved my problem with this. I had my Father to walk me half way and then my Step-Dad joined us half way and we finished walking down the aisle. This was my way of including both and it it seemed right because my step-dad came into my life about half way through my life. Both were happy with this and made me happy to have both of my Dad's with me that day. When it came to have my first dance with them we did the same, half way through my step-dad finished the dance with me. Believe everyone thought it was beautiful.
2006-09-23 12:27:46 · answer #1 · answered by cejay1953 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure you are talking about the "giving the bride away" thing.
This tradition was started during a time when daughters were considered property of the father and then given to the husband as property.
One thing that is growing popular, and I did this at my wedding, is the bride and groom walking together down the aisle, starting their new lives out together.
This way all the parents can play an equal role in the ceremony by simply taking a seat in the front of the church (or courthouse or whatever.)
BTW, congratulations.
2006-09-23 12:21:07 · answer #2 · answered by thezaylady 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're very lucky. My cousin had both her father & step-father walk her down the isle. My husband's ex-wife has an idea for when their daughter gets married. Have your step-father walk you half way down the isle then let your father walk you the rest of the way to give you away. I've had a step-dad & would never want him around me. Thank God you have a great dad & step-dad. I'm sure both men are adult & understand your dilema & both are willing to help accommodate you & appreciate how much care for the both of them. Congratulations.
2006-09-23 12:32:24 · answer #3 · answered by 2D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your real Dad should walk you down the aisle. DO NOT waver on this one.....Stepdad can wear a tux and you can give him a special dance too.....let him know what a great stepdad he has been. If he's a good guy he will understand completely.
Good Luck
2006-09-23 12:32:00 · answer #4 · answered by Rocky99 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Allow your father to walk you down the aisle but have your mother, father and step father respond to "who gives this woman". If they get along well have them both escort you to the alter. It is YOUR wedding. It depends on whether the two decide to be adults or not.
The best way to work it out is communication. Sit them down together, if possible, and tell them your plans. Make sure that they know their roles in your life. Remind them that this day is about you and your groom, not their egos.
Good luck!!
2006-09-23 12:21:46 · answer #5 · answered by rswdew 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tricky situation but the thing is, it's YOUR day, not your dad or stepdad's. They should be happy for you, not upset that someone may be stealing their thunder.
They can both walk you down the aisle and they can both sit at the table for immediate family at the reception.
2006-09-23 12:15:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
We went thru the same thing with our family. The right thing to do is to have your Dad be the main man, as he is your Dad. Have your step dad do other things, or just be a participant. Your step dad knows he is your step dad so not to worry about this, he is a adult and realizes it.
Your Dad should always be the main Dad when things like this come up, all the adults will understand it, and if they don't don't worry about it, let them work it out!
2006-09-23 12:18:33 · answer #7 · answered by trainer53 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, you could have them both walk you down the aisle, which could be kind of weird OR have neither of them walk you down the aisle and ask each one if they would like to do a reading or say something at the ceremony or reception so they both still get to play a part.
2006-09-23 12:16:27 · answer #8 · answered by LadyRebecca 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would have your step dad as a host maybe as to not offend your dad-----or maybe talk to your dad about it and possibly they could both give you away
key thing is to apporoch your dad like this------explain what you jsut said to us and tell your dad the reason why you are going to him on this is you dont want to offend him----see what he has to say----let him know no one will replace him.
2006-09-23 12:24:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I HAVE ACTUALLY SEEN THIS DONE AND THOUGHT IT WAS SUCH A GREAT IDEA. FIRST YOU MUST HAVE 2 ADULT MATURE MALES THAT WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY. NEXT, APPROACH EACH ONE AND TELL THEM THAT YOU ARE FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO HAVE BOTH OF THEM IN YOUR LIFE AND WOULD LIKE THEM TO SHARE IN YOUR SPECIAL DAY.
ASK THEM TO BOTH, YES, BOTH WALK YOU DOWN THE ISLE. ONE ON EACH ARM. PEOPLE WILL UNDERSTAND WHAT IS GOING ON AND YOU ARE MAKING A STATEMENT.
IF ONE HAPPENS NOT TO BE A BIG ENOUGH MAN TO WORK WITH YOU, HOPEFULLY THAT WILL NOT BE BOTH, THEN HAVE THE OTHER ONE WALK YOU DOWN. I DO HOPE THINGS WORK OUT FOR YOU.
HOW VERY KIND OF YOU TO WANT BOTH.
2006-09-23 12:36:23 · answer #10 · answered by sunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋