2006-09-23 11:44:38 · 24 answers · asked by rebel one 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Honor her life. Find a way to keep her spirit with you. A mother always knows the hearts of her children. I am sure she knew how much you loved her. A mother never stops believeing in her children, no matter how much they rebel. Give her the honor with your life by turning over a new leaf. Stop the rebellious ways. Be a man of integrity. Teach other young rebels that life is short and not to take Mothers or anyone for granted, they will soon be daeparted. The best way to heal yourself is to accept the past, learn from it and move on to practicing what you have learned. You are a real hero to admit this. I think "real men" can admit their faults, their volunerabilities and always strive to be better. You the man!
2006-09-23 11:49:40 · answer #1 · answered by Shayna 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
grief is both a complicated and comprehensively studied life event. There are 5 stages and getting through them can not only be difficult but sometimes does not get completed. The scenario you present is among the more difficult ones to resolve. No way can I get into all of that using this medium. One thing that helps in all cases is to develop a relationship with God and pray daily preferably at the same time and in the AM b4 you start your day. Lotsa reason this is a good idea, Next if you can afford it find a counselor who specializes in doing this type of couynseling. Do not know where you live but most states require counselors to update skills by taking yearly courses on these types of areas so if you called the state liciensing board and said you wanted to take a course in grief counseling they might give you a list of classes or tell you where to look for those. Then if you call the one that seems to offer the longest most expensive class they can probably tell you who in your area has taken their class. Funeral homes might have people they refer people to. Here's the thing about counselors, just like friends you pretty much need to click with one to make speedy progress. If you are poor then a large church in your area may have counselors available and sometimes they are the best, often they work on a sliding scale for payment so you might want to check there even b4 seeking the more expensive person. This is something that can effect a lot of areas in your life even your ability to hold a job as can any trauma so don't let it go untended.
2006-09-23 11:58:41 · answer #2 · answered by icheeknows 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear sweet person, I wish I could just hold you in my arms and comfort you and take the pain away. I to am a Mom of a rebel child, so your Mom knew before she passed on what your character was, just like I know about my child. Please know that what you are feeling right now is healthy for you, it will pass and allow you to put your life in proper perspective. Your Mom loved you however you are, and she still does. She will walk at the right of you the rest of your life. I have told my sweet child this already, just in case. So please don't get down on yourself, her passing most likely will make you a better person, and she will see the change in you. And be sure to talk with your Mom every chance you get, and please don't forget to ask God for the strength to carry on.
I care, and am sending you Hugs.
2006-09-23 12:17:39 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
try to connect with the rest of your family - your siblings, your aunts and uncles and cousins.
We have a black sheep in our family too. He never comes around to family gatherings. Yeah, he was in prison a few short times - and has a troubled past - but we would all still like to see him and have him at our parties. Maybe he feels ashamed, but I know he has been working and trying to live right and why shouldn't he come around?
It's not good to isolate yourself away from family - especailly if you have a family that is descent and would accept you. If they are mature they will know they are not perfect either and we all have our troubles. Some of their troubles are not as obvious as yours perhaps - but that doesn't matter.
I feel sorry for your loss, it must be very difficult. I hope you find away to find comfort with your remaining family... and remember your mother together. God bless you.
2006-09-23 11:59:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My Dad died six months ago and I always been the black sheep too.Im so sorry to hear about your mom it really does hurt very badly.you feel really alone at first because its hard to exsplain its just a deep wound.please feel free to email me and talk.Sometimes family does not pull together as it should my heart goes out to you I too had a day where I posted a similar question on yahoo.answers and now I have some good freinds through it.please feel free to contact me or others its hard to go through something like this alone.It helps to talk or connect with others.
2006-09-23 11:58:41 · answer #5 · answered by butterflyspy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I AM SORRY TO HEAR OF YOUR LOSS. THE ONLY THING THAT I CAN SAY IS TO PRAY AND ASK GOD TO GIVE YOU CLOSURE AND TO FILL THAT VOID IN YOUR LIFE.
SOMETIMES WE DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THINGS HAPPEN THE WAY THAT THEY DO, BUT YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THAT EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON AND AT LEAST YOU WERE BLESSED TO HAVE HER AS LONG AS YOU DID. BE THANKFUL FOR THE GOOD TIMES THAT YOU ALL SHARED AND STOP FOCUSING ON THE DIFFERENCES. THERE'S NOTHING THAT YOU CAN CHANGE NOW, JUST MAKE SURE THAT YOU TRY TO MEND TIES WITH PEOPLE IN THE FUTURE, THAT YOU DEEM IMPORTANT OR SPECIAL TO YOU SO THAT YOU WON'T EVER HAVE TO EXPERIENCE THE EMPTINESS OR GUILT THAT YOU'RE FEELING NOW.
THINGS WILL ALWAYS BE BETTER TOMORROW AND THE NEXT DAY, AND IT GETS EVEN BETTER THE DAY AFTER THAT...KEEP YOUR HEAD UP. YOU ARE IN MY PRAYERS...GOD BLESS AND KEEP YOU (SMILE)
2006-09-23 11:55:54 · answer #6 · answered by CHASE_ME 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I lost my father when I was young as well. We can give you advice but its how you want to deal with your lost.
I know your heart is in deep pain.. am sure you don't want to even think about all the wrong doing you have done or the pain you might of caused.. I would tell you to sit down write a letter from your heart to you mother. Her spirit is still in you.. no matter what pain you might of cause she love you unconditional. Express what you need to express in writing. Read it aloud or keep it in a safe place.. to start healing is to understand your wrong doing and change who you are, inside.. Your mother body has left this earth but her spirit is in you.. My father has been gone over ten years and it still hurt but i can say am glad i do have some memory.. I did get to know who he was, I did get to laugh with him.. I can say I remember when.. as long as you have that .. the love will keep you.. pray and ask god for strenght, comfort and keep family close in your time in need now is not the time to shut love one out,
May god keep you
2006-09-23 12:09:38 · answer #7 · answered by M M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey sorry about your mother. You say you were a rebel. I'm sure in your mothers eyes you were her cherished one. She loved you no matter what. That's what mothers do. Please try to remember her with the love that she had for you. She is with the Lord now. Try and think of her being in paradise. How happy she must be. Can you just imagine.? I think you need time to grieve and morn for her. Please Lord for giving her a beautiful place to live. She will be looking down on you and would want you to get on with your life. She would want you to be happy and not put your self down. God be with you. Again I'm so sorry.
2006-09-23 11:55:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry. I lost my father when I was younger I know how it feels to lose a parent. I am also the black sheep and never felt I could turn to my family. Surround yourself with friends or one good friend. Counselors are good too. It can be hard to find a good one. You will know when you find one. Again I can't express how sorry I am. Feel free to talk to me anytime. Also try writing in a journal. It sounds cheesy but it works. Writing a letter (to your family members) but not actually sending it helps get your feelings out. Hang in there.
2006-09-23 11:50:14 · answer #9 · answered by Me luv u long time 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know what religion you are but whichever it it...I believe there is always life beyond death so no matter where she is I am sure she would want you to live your life and be happy....thats what any mother wishes!
In my family I am the reble and weirdo and what my uncle always tells me when I feel out or depressed is "You feel bad now...but if anything happens to you or if you leave...you´ll be the one we will all miss more"
Some times you dont need to say "I love you" coz just seeing how you are feeling at this moment I am definatley sure she knows exactly how you feel and feels the same too...
2006-09-23 11:57:30 · answer #10 · answered by sandra_freitas6 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋