What do you think?

4 ⤊

i need help with rhyming so i have been practicing but i can't help it, i am more comfortable with free verse. LOL
Also i need help with the title, have any suggestions?

There’s no need to lie

I won’t cry

U don’t have hide

I know you tried

U don’t have to leave

I need you by my side

I can’t go on, if you aren’t near

I can’t live if you aren’t here

I love you with every breath in my body

Let’s not fight anymore

I promise to listen

If you promise to open your heart.

If only you could see

How much you are apart of me

How much my soul cries for your soft and tender touch

How much I yearn for your lips to caress mine

I want you with me

I need you with me

Like a bird needs the sky

Like a flower needs the rain and sun

Please don’t leave

I cannot survive if your are not in my life.

2006-09-23 10:48:06 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Other - Arts & Humanities

6 answers

I'm no critic but I quite liked it.
I would call it Need

2006-09-23 10:51:26 · answer #1 · answered by cg1209 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋

thats really cute.. aww.. its really good dont be so hard on urself its good... the title can be somehting like.. without u.. or soemthing.. but other than that the poem is good!! =D

2006-09-23 17:50:29 · answer #2 · answered by ballroom babi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋

in the open space after,If you promise to open your heart.

Put,I promise not to fart.

2006-09-23 17:51:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋

call it open your heart

"dont give up" or "what's more to do?"

2006-09-23 17:51:15 · answer #5 · answered by xXxeliasxXx 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋

RHYMING LIKE SMART PART AND CART MART PLEASE MEASE

2006-09-23 17:49:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋